[MUSIC PLAYING]
The number one show in late night.
Nothing but illustrious guests.
Tonight, we are honored to have who in the building, Mero?
Finally, the-- the-- the brands have collided.
Mm-hmm.
We have-- we have the illustrious comedian, artist,
genius, and Michael Jordan showing
of his cock on television, Eric Andre, ladies and gentlemen.
Make some motherfucking--
- Eric Andre in the building. - --noise!
That's my fucking boy. - Give it up for Eric Andre!
- Yes, that's right. - Thank you.
Thank you. DESUS: Listen--
Look--
DESUS: --right up-- right off the bat, big shout out to you.
You are a huge inspiration for everything we do in comedy.
We used to sit and watch "The Eric Andre Show."
And we was just like, how do we make this?
Like--
How do we take this show and make it our own?
You-- you put us on our path.
And we want to say thank you, Eric.
Man, the feeling is mutual.
I love you guys.
And you guys are just getting more and more successful.
It's so nice.
You guys did it all on your own.
No help.
You just grinded, hard work.
And it paid off.
And fuck VICELAND.
Showtime, shout out.
Yerrr.
You're probably-- you're probably finally getting paid.
Not fired.
I don't give a fuck.
I'm letting it all hang out tonight.
Let it all hang out.
I'm letting it all hang out.
I don't give a fuck. Shout out--
DESUS: Yo.
--to the Hunt's Point 6 train stop.
Shout out to Duane Reade.
Yerrr.
Yo, I remember reading an article about "The Eric Andre
Show" that when you first recorded it,
it was like in a empty bodega, right?
Yeah.
So I think it was like either Bushwick or Bed--
not Bed-Stuy.
It was like the Kosciuszko stop on the JMZ I want to say.
Right.
There was this abandoned bodega
that they, like, turned into, like, a punk
rock, like, show space.
And then that fell apart.
Then kids were just going in there
and doing drugs and doing graffiti and stuff.
And then that kind of fell apart.
And then we rented it out from the guy for, like, 300 bucks.
And we filmed the first version of "The Eric Andrew Show"
there. I'm eating blueberries.
I'm sorry.
- Yo, that's beautiful. - I respect it.
It's healthy. It's healthy.
You know what I'm saying?
Yo, shout out to Golden Crust.
Shout out to the goat curry platter at Golden Crust.
DESUS: There we go.
There we go.
Shout out-- shout out to Ting with a little bit of rum in it.
- You know what I'm saying? - Listen.
Make sure you get there before 11:00 AM,
or that goat is gonna be sold out.
Exactly.
It's the Haitian, Dominican, Jamaican connection right now.
There you go.
Right there, the triangle.
It's been love between all Caribbean people.
Caribb-- Caribbean people used to fucking hate each other--
DESUS: Yeah. - --when I was growing up.
I wouldn't tell Jamaicans or Dominicans I was Haitian.
Now-- now, we love each other.
It's all love.
DESUS: Yes.
Peace and love.
Now, we're just like, yo, Americans, stay out of here,
go away.
We know you love the beaches here and shit, but go away
please. Stop.
You guys can't come back.
Yo, Eric, your new comedy special,
"Legalize Everything", I've seen it, hilarious, you know.
ERIC ANDRE: Thank you.
And it's-- it's definitely in your comic
style because it's got that kind of chaotic wow,
dick jokes here.
But at the same time, you're talking
about, like, the cops, police brutality, social justice.
How do you-- how do you find that balance?
How are you able to just, like, walk that line?
You gotta-- you gotta have that balance.
Because if you're too--
too political the whole time, you're kind of preachy.
And then you lose the audience.
But if it's dick jokes the whole time,
it's that there's no dynamics and stuff, right?
DESUS: Right.
You gotta-- you gotta-- it's called highbrow-lowbrow.
You've got to go, like, poop joke, then something political.
Dick joke, something political.
You've got to, like, go up and down
and intertwine the two to-- to keep the audience's attention.
That's the formula, man.
Like, yo, that show was so iconic, right?
And it's like, also, like, how did Hannibal come into the mix?
Because he was, like, your perfect--
like you know what I mean? Like--
Oh, I've been--
I've been knowing Hannibal--
Hannibal and I have been doing it since the very beginning,
since we filmed in that bodega.
Me and him were doing awful open mic
comedy together in, like, 2005.
And then I just thought he was genius from--
Yeah.
--from that first time at standup.
And-- and he's perfect because polar opposite in energy.
Energy, yeah.
He was just like--
Complete opposite in energy.
DESUS: Yeah.
I'm like-- I'm sweating.
I was shouting out the Bronx and Golden Crust so hard,
I'm, like, sweating.
DESUS: You've got the drip.
Yo, I be sweating.
It's natural.
Don't-- don't fight it.
And shout out to Hannibal.
Hannibal-- like, when we met Hannibal,
that was like one of the coolest--
the coolest people we've ever met in Hollywood.
He was-- it was South by Southwest.
And he was just chopping it up with us the whole time.
Just a good dude.
Shout out to the homie.
Oh, yo.
Oh, man.
My funny-- I have a-- - Are y'all like--
--you don't remember this, Eric, because this is,
like, a throwaway.
It was at a Dave Chappelle show at Radio City Music Hall.
And I was in the audience.
And I seen you.
And I came up to you.
And I was like, yo, Eric, big fan, da, da,
we got to get you on the show.
Dah, dah, dah.
And you were just like, I'm sorry.
I have no idea who you are.
Oh, no!
No way.
That did not happen.
That happened. Yes.
But then--
There is no way I would say that.
You said it.
No, you said it very-- you didn't say it,
like, in a mean way. You were just like--
you're like, could you remind me who-- like,
you didn't know who I was.
But then I went and talked to Cipha Sounds.
And he was like, yo, Desus, what up?
And then you were like, oh, you're Desus?
Because at the time, we weren't-- like,
the show had just started.
So there wasn't-- you didn't know what I looked like.
You might have just known us off a tip or something.
And I was that brutally honest?
Usually-- usually I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'll hit you up.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm down.
What up? You know what I'm saying?
DESUS: No, you were-- you were-- but the thing was
I was just like, yo, I talked to Eric Andre.
That's crazy, bro.
That's-- really, I feel like our shows
came out at the same time.
It feels like you guys-- you guys are still coming.
No, this was--
no, this was super, super early on our-- like, super-- like,
we had-- like, we weren't really on the radar yet.
We had--
Yeah.
--just gotten off of "Joking Off" on MTV 2.
- Yeah. - So like--
Yeah, that was-- those was rough days.
Those were rough times.
So basically is there still Golden Crust?
Does Golden Crust still exist?
MERO: Hell yeah.
Oh, yeah, Golden Crust still exists, still out there.
MERO: Go through it.
Selling-- selling overpriced patties and stuff.
We out here.
Goat curry, I fuck with goat curry.
Yeah, it's so good, right?
The-- the thing that I fuck about--
that I love about you the most that I fuck with so super hard
is that like you'll literally just do whatever the fuck
you want. And like--
I do.
--and you-- and you get to cook.
Like, how do-- how do you get-- like, how do you convince cause
you know how it is, bro, when you go into, like, pitch
meetings and shit like that.
You're with executives.
You're like, yo, this is what I'm trying to do.
ERIC ANDRE: Yeah.
Like, do you actually tell them what you're trying to do,
or do you-- are you like--
ask for forgiveness instead of permission type of dude?
A little bit of both.
I mean, I've--
I've only really successfully sold one show.
And it's "The Eric Andre Show." And that--
DESUS: Right.
--we did just by filming it ourselves
because I knew when it--
I wouldn't be able to sell it with just the pitch.
I knew I-- it wouldn't, like, convey what I
was trying to do with the show.
So we went out, and we filmed this thing in the bodega.
But we also filmed, like, a prank where I dressed
up like Ronald McDonald.
And I went to a McDonald's.
That was in Manhattan.
That was, like, right across the street from NYU.
And then we did it again in Union Square.
So I went in McDonald's dressed as Ronald
McDonald smoking a cigarette.
And I fired everybody.
I was like, I'm the boss, you're fired.
You're hired.
You're fired.
And then-- and then we drove way out into the country.
And me and Jermaine Fowler crashed
this Civil War reenactment.
Mm-hmm.
We were dressed like slaves.
And while-- DESUS: Yes.
ERIC ANDRE: --while people were doing this Civil War shit,
we jumped out in slave shit dressed like Kunta Kinte.
And we're like, fight us.
Help us.
Oh my god.
And we had our white friend, Sean,
chase us around with a whip like, get back here, Toby.
Oh my god.
We filmed all that by ourselves.
And we-- I edited it together.
And then I sent that to Adult Swim.
And that's how I got the show.
So that's-- that's all I know on how to get a show.
And that's the only show I've ever sold.
So and then everything else, I just try
to push it to the legal limit.
I've pushed it over the limit and got arrested before.
And that sucked.
So I try not to get arrested.
Yes.
Do you guys get free shoes?
Sometimes.
But I still got to buy them.
Shout out to them.
Get me some Jordans.
What's up, man?
What size are you?
Let me hold some Jordans.
11 and 1/2.
11-- oh, that's a--
that's a-- that's a perfect size right there.
Well, we'll hook-- you don't gotta--
you don't gotta-- you don't gotta, like, a connection?
Oh, I got--
I got-- yeah, I'm talking shit.
I got--
That's what I figured.
I'm like, I know he's gotta have some kicks.
Come on, bro.
Stop making that stuff up.
Bro, I know you sitting on the floor
in, like, an AirBnB and shit, like, you don't
got sneakers on deck, bro.
Come on.
Yo, so how's corona been treat-- how's quarantine?
Like, how you surviving?
It sucks, man.
I want to fucking get out of my house.
I've been drinking too much.
DESUS: Yeah.
But here's my-- here's all the alcohol I've been drinking up.
DESUS: Hey, yo.
MERO: Hey, yo.
I got--
This seems like an episode of "Bar Rescue."
--I like rum.
I got a lot of Jamaican rum. - Hey.
I got Hennessy.
I'm half black.
I got-- I got a big thing of Hennessy.
Don't worry.
Hey, the hen dog.
Oh, yerrr.
Wait a minute.
And I've got a lot of--
I love rum.
I've got a case of rum.
I got Cuban rum, which you can't get in America.
I snuck this into America.
- Woo. - Oh, wow.
The flex. - Oh, shit.
Smuggling shit.
We out here.
Look at that.
Eric Andre, comedian smuggler with a bird on it.
He out here.
He got--
He has two kilos taped to his smash right now.
You guys still live in-- in the Bronx, or what's up?
Where are you guys at?
I-- I had too many kids, bro.
Like, I literally could not fit in my apartment.
I had to move to Jersey.
You in Jersey?
- Yeah. - You're in Jersey?
And also I was like--
I was, like, because during the discussion,
it was just like, yo, it's impossible to buy
a house in New York City, dog, like, unless you're, like,
a multimillionaire. - No.
I was just like, bro.
Like, I'm looking at houses and like,
you get a trap house for, like, $800,000.
I was like, fam, I got four kids.
Like, I wanted to have, like, you know, a little space
to run around and shit, like--
You're fertile.
MERO: Yeah.
Your-- is your wife Dominican, Puerto Rican?
Jewish.
Jewish?
Jewish Dominican.
You know I'm Jewish and Haitian.
Oh, shit.
Hispaniola can't be out here.
- The combination. - Dominicans.
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] I saw--
I went to Haiti.
I saw Christopher Columbur's fucking anchor and shit.
DESUS: Oh, wow.
I just-- yeah, I just went to the island.
That's fucking crazy.
You got a Dominican--
I know some Dominican Jews.
I can't remember off the top of my head.
But OK, l'chaim.
MERO: They out there.
Did you get circumcised later after the marriage or what?
No.
You know, the wildest shit, though, is like-- like--
like--
You got an anteater thing.
You got a vacuum cleaner. - Yeah, no, I got--
Like a flap.
--five anteaters in the house. You know what I'm saying?
Like, all of them.
And they all pull them, like, fucking--
like it's fucking Laffy Taffy.
Like, they in the shower, like, just playing
with their little things.
I'm like, yo, stop, stop, you're going to hurt yourself.
This-- this is a very Eric Andre interview.
You got any kids?
No. Look how many sneakers--
- You don't have any kids? - --I've got.
There's-- there's no way I can have some-- there's no
way I could have kids.
So you're in the-- you're in the city?
You're in Manhattan?
No, I'm-- I'm still in the Bronx.
OK, man.
You know, I never, ev--
I don't think I've ever been in the Bronx more than,
like, five times in my life.
You got to take me.
I mean, if you don't live there, there's--
You know what?
That means-- that means we have to bring-- when-- when
everything opens up, we got to wild out in the Bronx
with Eric Andre.
Yeah, what are we going to do?
You've got to take me to some pla--
I want to eat some Jamaican food.
I want to--
We're going to get Jamaican food.
MERO: Yeah.
We're going to get you some Coochie Fritos--
MERO: Little Orchard Beach.
Orchard Beach.
We gonna do it, bro.
And we're going to do it in full body green suits.
So we could-- overlay graphics on them.
You know what I'm saying?
[LAUGHTER]
It's sponsored.
Look, a human NASCAR car, and shit.
Like, running down Ocean Beach and shit.
Just with a dick hole cut out.
Yeah?
But, yeah, naw, like, yo-- what you were talking about,
like, high-low, like--
I don't know what the--
I mentioned this shit before, but I forget what magazine it
is, and it has, like, the culture
matrix, where it's like, highbrow, lowbrow, despicable,
whatever.
And I was like--
I always look to them, like, yo, that's a good, like,
barometer of, like, comedy.
Like, yo, like-- you know, keep the shit into, like, up here,
but then you gotta come down here, and come down here.
Like, you know, mix it up so so you--
Right.
I mena, that's why your guys' show works.
You guys can-- you guys are obviously hyper intelligent,
but you can talk shit like you're with your homies.
You know what I mean?
You want to be able to, like, talk shit, like,
with your boys, but you guys are smart.
You know what I mean?
And that-- you guys have that balance
that makes you guys-- that's what
makes you guys so successful.
Thanks.
Eric, how are you feeling about this election?
Miserable.
I feel miserable about this country.
I'm feel miserable about this fucking election.
I feel miserable about everything.
I was a Bernie supporter, so you know--
I'm glad Bloomberg lost.
Fuck stop and frisk, fuck Bloomberg.
Yeah, it's always--
Fuck red lining.
It's always fuck Bloomberg.
Did you guys ever get thrown up against a fucking
gate by the cops?
Bro, we're from the Bronx.
Like, we get that--
bro-- bro, we got--
we have double digit stop and frisk memories.
- Really? - OK?
Damn.
Listen--
It was part of my grad--
it was part of my high school graduation ceremony.
Oh, my god.
Bro, literally, it was at-- at one point, like,
we were getting into position before the cops
even said stop and frisk.
Like, the cops would just stop the car,
and you'd just be, like, all right, let's go.
All right.
Oh-- the nearest brick wall?
All right.
How are you doing, Officer Johnson?
How's your-- how's your wife?
All right? - Everything cool?
Yeah. All right.
You know.
Yeah, no-- uh, I'm not super into butt play.
Hey, you caught that Knick game last night?
Yeah. Bro.
OJ Wild--like.
That sucks.
I can't believe it.
I can believe it, but it's fucked up.
Yeah. Naw.
And the fucking shit is that you grow up thinking,
like, yeah, this is regular.
This is normal.
Like, this is what, you know, cops are supposed to do.
And now, you know, at our big age, we're like, yo, hold up.
This is not right.
Yes, I love that Mike Bloomberg got fucking
roasted during those debates.
Elizabeth Warren roasting him, and he was like, ah, mm, ah--
Ah, well, I mean, ah, well, you know, ah, well, know--
I'm rich, and you had stock, right?
Free watch.
Yeah.
And he-- he wasted--
he wasted so much money with that fake presidential run.
So much money. So much.
But you know what's wild?
Could have went to anything else.
Like, to him, I feel like wasting that money was
like, if you leave an avocado out overnight,
and you throw it out.
Like, that's the equivalent of--
Oh, he's worth 80-- he's worth,
like, 82 billion, kazillion--
Yeah.
He didn't-- he didn't even feel that.
Didn't feel that at all.
Feel that at all.
Wait, but where--
where in the Bronx are you living?
South Bronx.
Over Mott Haven.
I dated a Jamaican girl off the Hunts Point stop,
off of on the 6 train, like, in 2005.
That's my only-- that McDonald's off that--
Oh! Right there.
It's right there.
That's my date spot.
It's a couple blocks away.
Oh, wow.
I was like, bro, $0.99 menu.
Fuckin'--
Listen, everybody has a point in their life
where the dollar menu has held you down.
Yeah.
You-- you had it memorized.
You were like, oh, let me get a McChicken,
a McDouble-- hey, you know what?
I'm feeling-- let me get the four nuggets.
Thank you.
Yo, you know what?
Let me get a McChicken with cheese.
Tisha, I know you, so like, hook me up.
Don't charge me $0.30 for the cheese.
Cause I don't got it.
Eric, what advice would you give
any up and coming young comedians,
just starting in the game?
It's more hard work than anything.
Like, you can be the funniest guy amongst your friends,
but if you're not willing to put in the work, like,
it's all going to go to shit.
You have to put in a ton of hours.
You just have to love it, and be obsessed with it,
so it doesn't feel like work, but you have to grind.
And-- and your failures make you stronger.
Failure is the greatest teacher, so
just go up every night on stage, bomb, rewrite your jokes,
keep--
keep chipping away.
But it is-- it's a marathon, not a sprint.
You really gotta put in the hours.
What's your favorite, like, medium to like, work in?
Because, like, stand up--
I like--
I like pranking-- I like pranking--
I like pranking people.
I like going on the street, and the subway,
and pranking people.
We're doing a fifth season of "The Eric Andre Show,"
and we did--
I was actually at the Hunts Point stop, we started there--
I dressed like an MTA subway conductor,
and I had a live rat with me.
And I was going up to people on the subway, on the six train,
with this rat crawling all over me, like,
did anybody lose a rat?
I'm looking for the original owner.
Oh, my god.
And people were like, get the fuck away from me!
That is the best one.
Like, Jamaican grandmas were, like,
jumping out of their seat.
Like, jumping down the fucking subway.
I was like--
Is this your rat?
Like, people--
Listen-- that was one of the funniest scenes--
Get that shit away from me.
That was one of the funniest scenes
on "The Eric Andre Show."
I think it was-- maybe it was the L train, when you had
all the M&M's in the suit thing, and you were
just dropping M&M's on people.
And then-- because I'm watching it as a New Yorker,
and I'm like, what the fuck would I do in that situation?
If someone just comes on the train and is just dropping,
like--
in your mind you'd be like, yo, get the fuck out of here.
But at the same time, you're like, yo--
because then you're looking at other people,
like, do you see this?
Has this guy got M&M's?
Yo, what's going on?
Like--
That's how jaded new Yorkers are, dog.
You can see some shit like that on the subway
and just be like--
Yeah. You either take--
Just give it, like, yo, this motherfucker
dropping M&M's on the floor.
I need to not look.
Look--
I just crammed the M&M's into people's face,
and that's how you get them to pay
attention, and get off their--
then they-- then you light 'em up.
I did a-- I did a bit where I go, excuse me,
ladies and gentlemen, I'm selling Chinese food
for my basketball team.
$0.50 a bite.
And I was on the subway, and I was shoving
lo mein in people's faces.
And they were, like, uppercutting
the lo mein out of my hand.
DESUS: Yes!
Yo.
Oh, my god.
When you go into shit, like, do you--
like, do you think, like, yo, I might get fucked up?
Like, some shit might go down? Or like--
ERIC ANDRE: Yeah.
Are you ready for that?
Every single bit.
Yeah, I mean--
Do you, like, train, like, MMA and shit?
Like, just to be ready?
No.
I've never gotten in a fight.
I would get my ass kicked every single time.
I mean, I just push people to a point where they're
about to kick my ass, and then I kind of like, dial back,
and then I push them, and dial back, and I kind of--
but it gets intense.
It sucks.
Love it. I love it.
Listen--
I just know it's going to be funny in the editing bay,
but in the moment, it's fucking terrifying.
Listen, that's why you are the kind of what you do, Eric.
Yo, thank you for coming on the show.
This has-- hey, this has been a fun interview.
And just chopping it up with you, man.
Like-- - Thank you.
Getting ideas-- and we gotta do something together, man.
We gotta do, like, a bigger sketch.
It's just--
Let's prank Trump.
Yeah. I would--
Oh, that would be great.
That would be-- listen, we'll make that happen.
We thank you for being on the show.
Eric, everyone that comes on the show,
especially our most illustrious guests, get a neon sign.
What would you like your neon sign to say?
Oh, shit.
Uh, bukkake.
No, I don't know.
Uh-- Golden--
Golden Krust.
Golden Krust?
Give it up for--
Gotta give Golden Krust some love.
For overpriced patties.
Golden Krust. Give it up.
Big ups to Golden Krust.
Yo, give it up for Eric Andre in the building.
[SHOUTING]
Bird up!