DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE.
DO YOU FIND YOURSELF AVOIDING
CONFLICTS? CHARLIE SIMPSON
WITH THE ARKANSAS RELATIONSHIP
COUNSELING CENTER IS HERE TO
HELP YOU AVOID SWEEPING
PROBLEMS UNDER THE RUG. Is
sweeping problems under the
rug that bad? Sweeping
problems under the rug
typically does not start off
that bad but ends horribly.
When you are in the honeymoon
phase you may experience
conflicts but because you are
having so much fun, it's
easier to sweep those
conflicts under the rug and be
ok. As the Relationship
manifests, conflicts may
become a little more frequent
and we really start sweeping
issues under the rug. Next
thing you know, you look at
the rug and it's a mountain of
mess. Then a major conflict
happens and not only do you
talk about that conflict but
you begin pulling conflicts
from under the rug. Other
people may allow the conflicts
to overcome them and continue
to shut down emotionally which
is very dangerous for the
relationship. Is there
anything a couple can do to
manage the issues under the
rug? There are two things a
couple must do to manage
conflicts. The first is
maintain a strong friendship.
It's hard to argue when you
are having fun just like being
in the honeymoon phase. You
have to deliberately and
purposely find time for the
relationship in order to keep
the friendship strong.
Planning date nights without
the kids is important to keep
the emotional connection. What
is the second tip to managing
conflicts? The second tip is
to improve conflict
management. Listening, is one
of the best ways to manage
conflicts. The biggest tip is
to learn to validate by simply
saying "I'm hearing you
say..." then restate what your
partner said. Often times
during conflicts we don't
argue about the topic, but
argue to be heard. So it's
important to validate your
partner's perspective to avoid
sweeping those issues under
the rug. Graphics: 0.Sweeping
conflicts under the rug can
cause emotional disconnection
0.Build a strong friendship
0.Learn to listen