[APPLAUSE] - How are you doing?
Fine. I'm really well.
Good.
You look fantastic.
Thank you, as do you.
How's the family doing?
They're-- they're wonderful.
JIMMY KIMMEL: They're doing well?
They're delicious.
Everyone's healthy, no one's gotten the flu.
I mean, we got our flu shots, but thankfully--
JIMMY KIMMEL: Nobody had the flu?
- No, no one had the flu. - Wow.
That's remarkable.
And we've been traveling a lot, too,
so it's kind of remarkable with the things we've been touching.
Do you feel like you're staying
a step ahead of the flu?
I certainly hope so.
Are you very conscientious about washing your hands
and not touching things?
I don't touch my kids. JIMMY KIMMEL: Right.
Yeah. No, you can't.
Because they're Petri dishes, so--
JIMMY KIMMEL: They are filthy, yeah.
But with the amount of stuff we have touched--
because we use-- we go on a lot of road trips, use
a lot of gas station bathrooms.
And I feel like we're very lucky that we haven't.
Right.
You do go on a lot of road trips, so like--
Yeah.
You went on a road trip, I think,
over Thanksgiving, right?
Yeah.
Well, we've been on two in the last two weeks.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Two in the last two weeks?
We just got back from Mammoth and then we
drove to Oregon over Christmas.
Yeah.
We-- we are road tripping family.
JIMMY KIMMEL: How old are your daughters now?
Oh, I don't know.
Anybody?
Three and four and a half.
And for most families, that would be a nightmare--
traveling with a three and four and a half
year old kid in the car.
Yeah, but I kind of-- we also do a lot of--
like we live in a motor home sometimes.
So I like getting in a small space, not using our phone.
I mean, we do, full disclosure, put the TVs on in the back,
obviously. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah, sure.
But we like being-- you know, Dax
and I like being in that space.
We, you know, listen to podcasts and talk.
And he's always-- without exception--
if we drive over 75 miles, he will
tow his Razor and his trailer.
Oh, yeah. His, uh--
Which is a huge, off-road vehicle.
There it is. - Right.
That was the-- yeah.
That was the recent trip to Oregon.
And I'm not kidding--
sometimes we don't even use it.
- You just tow it? - No, no.
For real.
Why would you bring it, if you're not going to use it?
Because it is a symbol of his freedom.
And he--
What? In what way?
And he wants to tow it. I don't know.
He just wants to.
I don't question it. You know why?
Because life is about compromise.
I make him bring the dog when we road trip
and he's like borderline asphyxiating the whole time.
Oh, he's allergic?
So I'm like, you can tow it.
But here's the other thing that he doesn't know
that I recognize what it is.
Look, it's an attachment.
It's a lovey.
My one daughter has a lammie, my other daughter has a blanket,
my husband has a 1,000 pound, off-road vehicle,
and I, you know, have my vape pen, I think.
This is his security thing.
Why does it-- why--
[APPLAUSE]
[CHEERING]
#edgymom.
Yeah.
Does he-- we went camping together over the summer.
- Yeah. - Our families.
- Yeah. - And Dax--
Yeah, not just you and I.
- That would be weird. - There was more people there.
Although I'd be open to that, if you were interested.
- Me, too. - But Dax brought a--
he brought a full-size bouncy house.
Yeah.
And I'm not talking about like one of the--
one you would get some-- - At Toys 'R' Us.
- From, like, your uncle. - No, no, no.
Like on you'd rent or would be at a carnival.
It's the size of this desk, rolled up.
I know because it's in my garage.
It's why I can't park in my garage.
Yeah.
And then he plugs this thing in.
- Yeah. - And it starts inflating.
And it's huge. - Yeah, it's gigantic.
And the kids start going just wild--
- Yeah. - For it.
And then the guy who runs the campsite
comes over and goes, uh, no.
Hey, what's this?
No, no, no.
And then I realize we have a problem.
So I feel like I have to go talk--
like just kind of keep the guy occupied for 20 minutes,
while the kids bounce in the house.
Yes. Yeah.
And negotiate.
And didn't we say, next year, we'll
sign waivers or something?
JIMMY KIMMEL: They didn't want any waivers.
No, they didn't.
But-- well, if you remember, we were all given
a task for that camping trip.
And ours was to entertain the kids.
Some people were like, you bring the salads,
you bring the soups, our job was like crafts
or entertaining the kids. And--
You really delivered. Yeah.
Well, did we?
Or did my husband find the only toy
where you can actually leave your kids unattended
and get a break.
Like it's the lazy parents choice.
It is.
Because you're really just like, go bounce, sweet.
And then like nighttime mask.
And then we were out.
They should put a--
they should actually-- you should be able to lock those.
Zip them in here. I agree.
Yeah. And just let them bounce.
Just zip them in. They can't get hurt.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Well, they-- they do--
I guess they'd hit other. I guess.
Yeah. They could hit each other.
Yeah. I'm not a lawyer.
But then we just wrap them in bubble wrap or something.
I think we could figure it out. - We're onto something.
When you're on a road trip, what music do you listen to?
Who chooses the music in the car?
That depends. It depends.
And we've been on a lot of road trips.
I mean, we've probably logged 15,000
to 20,000 miles together.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, wow.
But one of our-- music is paramount.
And it's deeply personal.
And one of our first road trips was right after,
"When In Rome."
We drove on a motorcycle--
I don't know why we thought this was a good idea--
he thought it was a good idea--
from New York City to Detroit, to go see our families.
And we were newly in our relationship.
And he had chosen the music for the first two states.
And he likes a lot of, you know--
when he went into the service station
I thought, well, that's a wrap for me.
I'm up to here with the yacht rock, outlaw country.
Let's get some show tunes, right?
So I switched the iPod.
Well, he was not happy.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, I bet. Yeah.
Because I didn't ask, we didn't discuss it.
And it was also like-- we're both control freaks,
beginning of our relationship.
That fight got bigger and bigger as we're on the road, which
morphed into a fight about helmet laws
because Dax Shepard believes that if he's in a state that
does not have a helmet law, he should
be observing the local culture and not wear his helmet.
Well, you did just shoot, "When In Rome," so, yeah,
that does make sense, in a way. - Yeah.
And I was like, excuse me, no, you have to wear a helmet.
So this morphs into an even bigger fight.
And we ended up compromising on if he was on the highway,
he had to wear the helmet, but if he was on side streets,
he didn't have to wear the helmet.
And I'm not joking-- he took side streets for like four
hours, just to prove a point.
But then it started raining.
And I said, hold up, we didn't anticipate rain.
This is force majeure.
We need an addendum to this compromise.
And you have to wear it if it's raining-- period.
He was not happy.
And it-- the rest of the road trip--
I think through all of Ohio, up to Michigan--
we were fighting so bad.
We both lost our voice because we were screaming at each other
on the motorcycle.
And I refused to hold on to him, so I held onto the back
of the motorcycle, like a boss.
JIMMY KIMMEL: With show tunes blaring the whole way?
I just held onto the back.
I was like, I'm not touching you right now!
And the worst part is that we pull up to my mom's house
and she is oblivious to the near-breakup breakup we are at.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, right.
Yeah.
She meets us in the driveway with camcorder and digi-camera.
The whole thing getting coverage, right?
After a medium length photo shoot next to the bike we rode
in on, she's-- the first time she meets Dax,
she said, I'm so excited to have you here.
And honey, I have great news.
I pulled out all the VHS tapes of our favorite show.
Let's go in.
We sit down in the den.
And I see, on the table, there's eight VHS tapes.
And on the spine of every one of them, it says "Alf."
Because that was our favorite show.
And, at that time, I thought it was a really good show.
In retrospect, I do understand, they actually shot
off the set during the, uh--
during the title sequence.
I was like, did I just see lights and a crew?
Anyway-- because, yeah, I've watched it since.
So we sit down.
And he describes this experience--
how long have I been talking?
I don't know, but it's OK. I mean--
Sometimes I honestly think that--
and I wore a watch, so I thought I'd check.
Oh, not too bad.
Do you want to take a break and come back to "Alf"?
Yeah.
Let's take a break.
When we come back, the thrilling conclusion to Kristen Bell's
story about Dax and "Alf."
[APPLAUSE]
Before the break-- so Dax and Kristen are in a big fight.
First time meeting your mom.
Yeah.
Mom brings you in and, wisely, sits
you down on a couch to watch a stack of "Alf" VHS's.
Right.
Exactly.
And Dax describes that moment as-- he says,
he sat down and he said, I had an out-of-body
experience because I just--
I hate this girl I'm sitting next to, we're on the verge
of a breakup, I think her mom is crazy,
and, all of a sudden, I'm watching "Alf," and I can't--
I'm just-- he was fully outside of his body.
And we got-- we got through two or three eps
before he politely excused himself,
and went, and visited his dad. - Oh, wow.
He left the house? - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I wanted him to leave the house.
Did you continue watching "Alf" as he left?
No.
Or did you then take a break?
No, we took a break, but we continued dating, Jimmy, and
that's the moral of the story.
JIMMY KIMMEL: And you wound up getting married.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- Because we-- - And now you have kids.
Yeah. We worked through it.
It's about compromise.
It's about understanding the other person's wants and needs.
And, you know, we weren't listening to each other back
then, but now we listen. JIMMY KIMMEL: Now you listen.
- Yeah. - That's nice.
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