- Ew, bro, look at her cellulite.
- Ew!
- SHUT UP!
Rich: Isn't this guy ugly?
His pores are disgusting and he's got a little stubby neck.
All the signs of being an ugly, worthless human being.
This-- (laughs) this is how a human should look.
No imperfections at all; and a body only video game characters can achieve.
And how did they achieve this look?
With photoshop of course.
The only problem is you can't bring these photoshop wonders into real life.
OR CAN YOU?
I'm Rich Muscles and I'm gonna make you into the cover model of your dreams.
Ever since I was a little tyke, I was obsessed with fashion magazines and soon became frustrated that no one actually looks like the people on the pages.
So I did what any sane person would do.
I opened my own unlicensed plastic surgery clinic that specializes in my own ground-breaking technique.
PHOTOSHOP PLASTIC SURGERY!
Who needs a medical degree when you could just spend a couple hours researching it on Wikipedia.
And now I'm able to use that knowledge to preform some of the most popular proceeders that you see done to people in photoshop.
Check out these masterpieces!
Smaller nose.
Ian: Woah!
This is awesome!
Rich: Get that anime look with some big-ass eyes.
Rich: We'll even get rid of these ugly pores.
Holes in your face are gross!
Woman: I can't feel my face.
Rich: Super skinny waist.
Teenage Girl: Awesome, but I think my liver's bleeding.
Rich: Super long neck.
Worker: I look like a giraffe!
Woah, woah, woah woah woah!
Rich: Super long d***.
Asian: What's up ladies?
Rich: And I know you're asking yourself, "How could possibly do it so cheap?"
Well my friend, it's as easy as A, B, C.
That's acid, blowtorch, and chainsaw.
But, you don't gotta take my word for it.
Just listen to my happy customers.
Herman: Not only do I look good, but now I can also shop in the kids section.
Richard: I used to have a massive nose and small eyes and no one wanted to be my friend.
But with my new perfect look, everybody loves me.
Richard: Aw come on!
I just wanted a hug!
Rich: PHOTOSHOP PLASTIC SURGERY!
And to prove I stand by my service, I'm gonna have myself transformed into the most beautiful, sexiest person in the world that would even put shame to the photoshopped models.
Drill me.
Finally, I'm officially the hottest person alive.
Photoshop Plastic surgery, conveniently located in the basement of Mr. Wang's Happy Ending Massage Parlor.
Tell him "Rich sent you."
and we'll swap your belly button and your anus for free.
- To see bloopers and another awesome Photoshop surgery, click the link in the description below.
- You can have the JWoww.
- Whoa!
- Click the subscribe button and get a penis attached to your chin.