Okay you don't want to fall, so you're going to have trouble relaxing.
It's kind of like peeing your pants on purpose.
What?
Peeing your pants on purpose.
You know, you spend your whole life trying not to pee your pants.
So letting go, peeing your pants on purpose, it's next to impossible.
How do you know this?
Who would try that?
You were supposed to be inside.
I should have never trusted the flawed calculations of a clone.
Clone? I'm not Ah ah-
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
Aww look at her, she's adorable.
But isn't there like an age requirement for this ride?
Am I wrong? This seems weird, right?
Rex.
I don't know you're here.
Isn't there a- size requirement?
I'm sorry.
For what? Your tiny-
I mean, the way you've been strutting around here, you must be
compensating for something.
Go go go go go go go.
Refreshing, kind of tickles.
I prefer a higher caliber.
Okay, okay, let's take a break.
Now you're talking.
Last one to Mount Everest does the dishes for a week.
Go!
Yeah haha.
Wait, where's Mount Everest?
It's the high one.
Looks like dad's saving the White House
Alone?
Guardians are there too.
Who are they fighting?
Oh, Mauler Twins.
Looks like we won't be getting breakfast together this
morning, bummer.
It's the white House mom, kind of important.
Oh, they rebuild that thing twice a year at this point.
I literally have no idea what any of that means.
Well, I don't know what to tell you man.
Your planet signed up for the program.
See, request from Urath for evaluation.
Urath, this is Earth!
Earth?
Yes.
Not Urath?
No.
Is that with an e or a u?
E!
I'm in so much trouble.
Close one.
It's about time.
No Rex, you're just an-
Well, how is that news?
You should be on my side.
We can tear down the old power structure, build a new order.
I mean, look at the costume they've got you in.
Talk about pandering to gender roles.
I designed my own costume, and I thought your doctorate was in seismology.
Undergrad in sociology and women's studies.
I had a minor in African dance, but enough politics.
We've got security turned up to 100 on you two.
New cameras, new guns, new doors, new guards, you ain't going nowhere.
Did you?
Oh, yeah, I- portals now didn't I mention that?
Mom. What?
I'll be out in a minute.
I don't have a minute.
Mom!
My bathrooms out of soap, get over yourself. I used to change your diapers, kid.
There's nothing going on down there I haven't seen before.
Just get out!
So when you say cursed, is that like a metaphor or-
What the hell?
I mean, it's cursed.
Permanent midnight, perpetual darkness, summer on the dark side of the moon.
So weird.
Let me know when you're done playing tourist.
What happened?
Dad saved us from the flaxans, but he went into one of their portals.
Oh, so he'll be late for dinner?
I was worried before because I've never seen your father so badly hurt.
But taking on aliens in another dimension, that's just Tuesday.
But it's been months and quite frankly Livingston, this is the US
Space Administration, not therapy.
Oh, God no.
Well, I don't know how else to say this.
Please don't kill me.
What?
Spare me.
I won't fail you again, I swear on my three chambered heart.
Just please do not stab all three of them.
Christ on a Christmas tree, no one's killing anybody.
Oh hello chums.
I'd like to run while remaining in a stationary location.
Is that cool beans?
Where are you from?
For real? Where are you from?
Go ahead Shapesmith.
I'll just be over there, in a stationary location.
You think you could just punch your way out of this?
I know where your family lives, and that means you work for me until I
say you're- done.
Oh, Jesse see?
Impressive- like that is exactly why I'm never letting you go.
Plus, now you got to pay for the desk too.
This was imported Italian maple.
Calamari for dinner?
Get that off my counter.
Aw you sure, it's considered a delicacy in some places.
And an aphrodisiac.
Like you need it.
It's an honor to meet you and I'm very sorry for what my father did
but I can't do this.
And definitely not here in front of everyone.
Okay? This is kind of awkward, but I have a girlfriend.
Her name is Amber, and we're finally in a good place so even
though, you know, you seem super nice, it just wouldn't feel right.
To-
What do you speak of?
As the original article my intellects undiluted by the cloning
process that created you.
Oh please, just open the door.
Say it.
You cheap, genetically inferior knockoff.
Say it or stay here forever.
I'm the clone.
Oof!
One of you is better in the kitchen.
No wonder your bourguignon is terrible, can't even make decent
lemonade.
Argh. Hibernian is exquisite.
You- and so is my lemonade.
When it's not laced with a modified mycotoxin, that is.
College is a fresh start, and I want you to enjoy every second of it.
This is your chance to figure out who you are. And I don't mean Invincible.
I mean Mark Grayson, my only son.
My- my baby boy.
My-
Okay, okay.
I love you mom.
Mm.
And don't do drugs.
Would they even work on me?
You do not need to find out.
Pack a lunch my-.
Uh, two tickets for Midnight Slaughter.
That's rated R.
I see.
And?
You need your parents to buy you R-rated tickets.
That's ridiculous, how does a parent's presence change a film's
suitability for the underage?
It changes it in that I don't get fired for selling you a ticket.
Hey, it's fine they're my kids, they can see the movie.
What?
You want to do a DNA test now?
Oh hey, you're back early..
Wow.
Uh, how was Mars?
By the looks of it, less eventful than whatever was happening here.
We'd love to hear more over dinner.
Sweetie, we're having chicken.
You want me to fight that?
Seems a little unfair.
Okay, I win.
Can I go now?
That makes a lot more sense.