Agree or disagree?
Forgiveness is the most important aspect of marriage.
Well, I suppose you could disagree with that
by saying that "agape" love is.
Love is something we're talking a lot about today
because it's Valentines Day.
But, to be fair, forgiveness is a big part of that
selfless, "agape" love.
Since you know that
sin is going to take place in your marriage
because every marriage is
made up to two sinners.
I'm not sure how a marriage could survive without true forgiveness.
The truth is, many don't.
Well, what does God say about marriage?
There was a time in Jesus' ministry when Peter
excitedly came up to him and asked him a question,
"Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother
when he sins against me?"
Now when you're asking a question
and you want the person to give a response,
you need to pause
so that they can actually answer it.
Peter was not interested in Jesus' answer
because he just wanted to show his generosity.
He immediately shouted out,
"Up to seven times?"
As though that was a great number.
You see in that day and age there was
a misconception about,
number one, how God forgives.
And then by extension,
how we should forgive.
The misconception was this:
Some of the rabbis taught
that God was willing to forgive a sin
to an individual up to three times the same sin.
And so, by extension,
if you want to be a very generous forgiver, forgive like God,
you'd be willing to forgive three times.
Well, Peter wanted to
one-up that, or four-up that and he said,
"Well, I'd be willing to forgive up to seven times."
Jesus needed to correct
Peter's understanding and our understanding of a couple of things.
Number one, how God forgives.
And then number two, how we are to forgive.
And so Jesus tells this parable.
It's an earthly story with a heavenly meaning.
He tells Peter about this king
who wanted to settle accounts.
And so, he calls a servant in.
And this is just an incredible,
it's almost an unbelievable story.
He calls a servant in who owes him 10,000 talents.
To put that in perspective, that's the equivalent of
billions of dollars.
This would never happen.
And so the king demands that the servant pay this money back.
But the servant's not able to pay, obviously.
And so he falls on his knees and he begs.
He says, "Please have patience with me and I'll pay back everything."
Which could never happen.
Again, put it in perspective.
Let's say you owe $5 billion.
And the interest rate is 6%
and you have a job that makes $50,000 a year.
How long is it going to take you to pay that debt back?
You would never be able to, right?
You'd just go further and further in debt.
And so the king knows this
and he does the most, again, unbelievable thing.
He forgives the debt.
And he lets him go.
Can you imagine the relief
of that servant
who just had that incredible debt forgiven?
Just to give you a microscopic view of that relief,
what if I said to you today
that your mortgage is completely paid for?
Right? The relief you would feel.
So then the servant who had that debt forgiven,
he goes out and finds a fellow servant
who owes him about 100 denari,
which is about three months' wages.
Now please don't misunderstand.
Three month's wages is a lot.
That's not a small amount, right?
If you lost three months wages, would that be a big deal?
Absolutely.
However, the point is,
it's nothing compared to the billions of dollars
that he had been forgiven.
So he demands the debt from the servant
and the servant falls on his knees before him
and begs, "Please have patience with me
and I will pay back everything."
Does that sound familiar?
It should. That's what the servant did before the king.
But this time the servant refused.
And he had the man thrown in jail until he could pay back everything that he owed.
Are you outraged?
So was the king.
He called that servant back in
and he threw him in jail until he could pay back everything he owed.
Which meant that was for eternity.
Do you see the point of the parable?
We are that first servant
who owed the king an unpayable debt.
And what did the king do?
He forgave it.
Everyone of us can relate to Barabbas.
Do you remember Barabbas?
He was the criminal that was
convicted of murder and standing in jail
awaiting for crucifixion
with Jesus and the other two criminals.
His conviction was for murder and a host of other crimes.
Not unlike our list.
Well, there he is, sitting in his jail cell,
and he hears the footsteps of the soldier
walking down the hall.
And he hears the sound of the key in the cell door lock
and he hears the door open.
And the guard says to him the same thing God says
to each one of us.
You're free to go.
Jesus is dying in your place.
That's what Jesus did for you and for me.
That's how much he's forgiven us.
And so now what do you want to do
in your relationships, in your marriage?
Well, one word.
Forgive.
If your spouse tried to sin against you
as much as they could for the rest of your life –
please don't do that, by the way –
they could never sin against you as much as
the debt that we owed to God
that he has already forgiven us.
So forgive each other
because Jesus has forgiven you.
And then actually act like that at home.
One of the most powerful things in the world
is when a spouse forgives
and then acts as though they don't remember that sin anymore.
It's a way for you to love your spouse.
It's a way for you
to show your spouse how God acts.
Let's pray.
Dear Jesus,
Thank you for forgiving me so enormously.
Help me forgive my spouse and others in my life that completely.
In your precious name I pray.
Amen
Happy Valentines Day.
I hope you have a wonderful day.
And I hope you remember all of the things we talked about this week about love
so it's not just a Hallmark holiday.
Share below something special you're going to do today
with your spouse.
And then keep your eyes peeled in the coming weeks
because we're going to have another series on
marriage and especially our relationships within the marriage.
May God bless your day.