- 10 tips for building
a strong emotional connection
with your partner.
(gentle music)
Hello, my name Greta Bereisaite,
a dating and relationship coach for women.
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And just before I will share with you
those 10 tips on how to build
that strong connection with your partner,
don't forget to take my free self-awareness test
to find out,
"are you behaving as a high value
"or a low value woman?"
Which I will drop down
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And now, without further ado,
let's start with your tip number one:
"Make him feel like a man,"
which sounds completely crazy,
and bizarre, and should be common sense,
but it's not because guess what?
A lot of women don't really have
much knowledge about differences
between men and women.
And nowadays, we are so influenced
to believe that we practically the same,
which is not true.
We are very, very different.
But when we are influenced
by today's society to think
that we are the same,
a lot of times women start
to treat men like other women.
They would treat men the way
they would treat their female friends.
And guys lose attraction
in these type of women very quickly
because these type of women don't let
a guy lead,
they don't let a guy pursue you.
They wear their heart on a sleeve,
they call and text whenever they feel like it.
Basically, behaving exactly the same way
as she would be behaving
with her female friends.
Ladies, guys get really turned off by that,
and this is not how you build
an emotional connection with a man.
If you want to build
an emotional connection with a man,
first you have to be aware
that men and women are different.
And then, you need to let him be a man
by treating him like a man.
So for example, you let him lead you,
you let him arrange the dates.
Words such as "I like you," "I love you,"
should always come from a man first.
So, and when...
Ladies, when you let a man be a man,
you automatically will start
to feel very feminine with him
because he will start to treat you
in very charming, masculine ways.
And this is exactly when you will
both start to feel emotional connection together,
by complimenting one another.
Number two is "Respect him."
Ladies, so many of you 'let a man lead,'
but then you tell him exactly
how to lead you
and all the mistakes he's making
along the way.
Ladies, this is not letting a man lead.
This is actually you taking the control,
you're taking the lead,
and you're not showing respect towards him.
And when you behave this way,
guys usually get really irritated.
We start to feel disrespected by you.
We feel like we are not good enough for you.
We start to hold the grudge.
We get a bit angry,
we get a bit aggressive,
or we pull away.
Therefore, ladies, if you are letting him lead,
let him take that lead.
And sometimes, even if he does mistakes
along the way,
ignore those mistakes.
For example, if he's driving a car
and he is telling you that he knows
a really good way to go
but you know a shorter cut,
and he's that type of guy
that likes to take the lead
and kind of wants to be praised
by taking the lead,
and now you are telling him,
"No you're not going the right way,
"you should turn here.
"Why did you turn here?
"Why didn't you let this car go through?
"Why don't you stop here?"
He will get really, really irritated.
Saying this, there are types of men
that will ask you "what is the shorter way?"
And they will follow your lead.
Saying this, I do find it that
they only doing it in the beginning to be nice.
They don't necessarily like it.
And later on, along the way,
they usually take the lead,
they take the control.
And if I were you,
I would pick my battles.
And if he is leading me somewhere,
even if he's making a few mistakes
along the way,
I would totally ignore it
because pointing out those mistakes
and damaging the mood for the day,
for me, personally,
it just would not be worth it
so I would just go with the flow.
Number three, "Don't give him advice
"unless he asks for it."
So I find this often happens
with ladies that are entrepreneurs,
or we're very successful in their business,
or we work in high corporate environments,
and let's say we are dating a guy,
no matter very successful
or not very successful,
and we go on a date.
And for example, maybe the guy doesn't have
such a wide knowledge as she does.
A lot of times, these women start
to give a guy advice and tell him
what to do with his life.
And ladies, if you are on a date
with a user,
he'll be very happy with your advice
and he'll definitely take it
and will employ it.
However, if you are on a date
with the guy that's actually looking
for a real relationship,
many times he'll start to feel
like you are smarter than him,
or you know more,
and that he's not good enough for you.
And a lot of times,
we actually start to disagree,
even though if you're making sense,
or negate you.
Saying that, obviously there are
very secure men and very confident men that,
let's say, don't earn as much as you do
or have a lesser job,
but they will take your advice
and will respect it.
However, the safest way to do it,
only give a man advice
if he asks you for it.
And if he doesn't ask for something,
just let him figure it out by himself.
And if he's making mistakes along the way,
let him do it
and let him learn from it.
Number four, how to build a connection
with a guy is "Respect his downtime."
So maybe his downtime is
to be calm and quiet,
and just have peace in the home.
Maybe his downtime is
to hang out with his friends.
Maybe his downtime is to go fishing.
Maybe his downtime is just
to step away from everyone, including you,
or just to pull away just specifically from you.
At the end of the day,
respect his downtime
and don't chase him, don't call him,
don't nag at him for it,
and don't look for attention from him.
If he needs peace,
or if he needs to wind down,
or hang out with his friends,
respect his decision
and give him that space.
This will make you come across
very secure, very confident,
and will show him trust.
And if you will not question him
when he's having his downtime,
he will really appreciate it
and will come back to you,
giving you his full attention
and his full energy in no time.
Number five, "Don't expect too much."
I find that a lot of women nowadays
really fall for these fairytale fantasies
and we start to expect from men
way, way, way too much.
Like, we, for example,
expect a man to treat her like a princess
all day, every single day,
hugs, cuddles, kisses.
All day, every day, calling her "babe" and "love"
all day, every day, nonstop.
Like, he should not switch off.
And these are very high,
humanly impossible expectations.
How will a man treat you like this
if he has problems?
Maybe he's got problems at work
and he wants to focus on those problems.
Maybe he's tired from work
and he wants to wind down,
and he just does not have the energy
to treat you like this queen princess,
by putting you on a pedestal 24/7.
Maybe somebody in his family passed away
and he's mourning towards that,
and he can't give you any attention
perhaps even for a few weeks
or longer than that.
So ladies, my advice here would be have
realistic expectations,
and if he's very sweet and kind to you,
and is treating you very, very well,
majority of the time,
the days that he doesn't
and he takes his space
for whichever reason,
respect his space, do not nag,
and do not seek attention,
or try to "communicate"
what you are unhappy about in a relationship.
Because if he actually loves you,
he will start to lose attraction
for your needy behavior.
And on top of that,
if he truly loves you,
he will start to feel like
he's not good enough for you,
like he just physically cannot make you happy
because he doesn't have a capability
to give you as much as you want
or need him to.
Number six, "Set in boundaries."
A man will not love a woman
that he does not respect.
Why is that?
Because ladies, if you don't have boundaries,
you're showing that you don't
really value or respect yourself.
A lot of times, men,
and people in general,
will test your boundaries,
will test how much you value yourself,
will test how much you respect yourself,
will test "can he play you?
"Can he manipulate you?
"Can he walk all over you?"
And if you will allow that,
their respect for you will start to go down.
Therefore, it's very important
to set in healthy boundaries,
then you will stand up for yourself.
This is when a healthy, high value man will
actually start to feel the love for you
because he will see that,
no matter how kind you are,
you have your value and worth
and you stand up for it.
Therefore, he will start to value
and love you more too.
Saying this ladies, a very important note:
If you're dating somebody
and you feel like you need
to set in five boundaries in a day,
that's a toxic guy.
Don't even go that way.
However, if you're dating somebody
and you feel like you might have
to set in some sort of stronger boundary
after about couple months,
or three months' time,
that's normal, that's fine.
Number seven, ladies, a guy needs to feel
that you like him,
that you are into him,
as this is the way
that he will keep pursuing you,
he will keep coming after you.
If he feels that you are just not into him
because you're behaving too arrogant,
too aggressive, ultra-confident,
like you don't care,
he will stop pursuing you.
Okay, so this is a very important note.
A man needs to feel
like you are interested in him
but you are not obsessed by him.
This is a huge difference.
So when you show a man
that you're interested,
you can actually have a healthy relationship
and he will still keep pursuing you,
and coming off to you,
and sweeping you off your feet, etc, etc.
However, if you take it to another level
and you actually show him
that you're obsessed with him,
this is when it's gonna get
too much for him
and he will start to lose interest
because a woman that's interested behaves
in a high value way.
A woman that's obsessed behaves
in a very low value way,
and guys lose interest
for these girls very fast.
Number eight, "Show him trust."
Just an example would be,
let's say, you guys are living together
and he's going out with his friends.
You just don't question him,
you just stay, "Oh, that's awesome, have fun.
"I hope you have a good time, bye."
If he wants to share who he's going out with,
he's free to do that.
And a lot of times when you don't question him,
they actually share everything with you.
But it's when you question him,
that's when they hold things to themselves
and don't want to say anything.
Because you know, guys like to tease as well
and make you a bit insecure.
It just becomes a whole new game.
And when you question a guy,
you also show him that you don't trust him.
And majority of times,
women don't trust men
because they feel insecure themselves.
They are dealing with their own insecurities,
which then makes you look quite unattractive
and he starts to lose interest in you,
and obviously the emotional connection too.
Number nine, "Be positive."
This is very attractive
in women and in everybody.
When things are not going as well,
see the good side of things, have faith.
You will make people around you feel good
by giving them the positive side of the coin,
by encouraging them to have faith.
And you will follow this type
of example yourself.
People will just start to see you
in more positive light,
and we will just want to spend
more time with you
because after spending time with you,
they will feel good.
Yet, if you are being negative,
if you are always criticizing somebody,
if let's say a guy gives you
some sort of idea
and you're telling him "It will never work,"
obviously that's not gonna make him feel great.
And do it a few more times,
and he will start to pull away from you
'cause he's losing emotional connection with you.
And the number 10,
how to keep emotionally connected to a guy,
is "Keep growing yourself as a person."
Keep educating yourself,
keep improving yourself
so you stay interested in your life,
and therefore he stays interested in you.
As you learn new things in life,
therefore you share new things in life.
Ladies, girls and guys get very boring
when we get into the routine
and we don't grow in life.
We just live on the other people's gossip,
and drama, and that's it.
If you want to be a high value woman
and you want to attract a high value man,
you just cannot go that path.
So ladies, these are my 10 tips
on how to keep
and how to build emotional connection with a guy.
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So thank you so much for watching,
kisses from the (indistinct).