New Year's Eve is the absolute worst holiday everyone knows this here's
something interesting 2018 is over three-minute to 2019 hooray
for us or something it's worth revisiting the year that was and in the
finest tradition of the most important time in all of our lives I'm of course
talking about high school handing out 2018 superlatives let's do this
Best Performance by someone running in 2020 who pretended they are not running
in 2020 Amy Klobuchar now one of the most delightful dances delightful in
modern politics is this people who are running for president her 10 they
haven't made up their mind about running for president take for example John
Kasich who told the radio host in November that he doesn't have a quote
burning desire to be President and quote but he does have a quote burning desire
to make a difference for our country cool story bro or Bernie Sanders who
delivered this humblebrag quote if there's somebody else who appears who
can for whatever reason do a better job than me I'll work my ass off to elect
him or her if it turns out that I am the best candidate to beat Donald Trump then
I will probably run a bit Bernie's really looking hard for that other
person but the winner of this year's points up relative is Minnesota's Amy
Klobuchar whose longtime political operative gave her a hometown paper this
gem of a statement quote many people have approached Amy about running for
president but right now she is still thanking people who helped her lead a
major winning ticket in Minnesota she's still very busy thanking people for her
last victory she can't be busy with this next victory
best campaign ad a literal dumpster fire that was a little on the nose here by
democratic Minnesota Senate candidate Richard painter but somehow still quite
fitting for 2018 now painter didn't win his Senate race
but he wants something our point award with a prize absolutely nothing well
deserved best oval office visitors the Kardashian West's West Kardashians and
reality TV star Kim Kardashian never heard of her met with Donald Trump and
other senior advisors in May to advocate on behalf of low-level drug offender
Alice Marie Johnson sort of 21 years in prison a week later
Trump commuted her sentence that girl gets results not to be outdone ever her
husband Kanye West made his own trip to the Oval Office in October presumably
also to talk about prison reform this time though cameras were in the room in
rolling the rapper delivered a 10-minute soliloquy on there was hydrogen planes
alternative universes 13th amendment something about when I put this hat on
and made me feel like Superman you may get a Superman now that's my favorite
superhero and you made a Superman cape it was unreal so it's a tie Kardashian
and West but really let's be honest Kanye one hydrogen planes best loss that
was actually a win Robert Beto O'Rourke now the breakout star of the political
year didn't actually you know win anything but that over arcs two point
loss to senator Ted Cruz in the red state of Texas transformed him from a
very little-known congressman into a national democratic darling and his
timing couldn't be more perfect 2020 presidential race is just beginning and
the Democratic field is wide open Federal Work may have lost that Senate
race but honestly it's 2018 as he looks to 2020 couldn't have gone much better
best come-from-behind victory Kyrsten Sinema
now when we all finally crawled in the bed on that very late night of the
midterm elections it looked like Republican martha mcsalley was headed
toward a picture in the hugely important swing state Senate race in Arizona six
days later it became clear that cinema the Democrat had actually won the Grand
Canyon State race flipping outgoing Republican Senator Jeff Flake seat from
red to blue cinema's come-from-behind win and others like it for Senate
Democrats in Montana and Nevada gave the party hope that even after
losing two seats in 2018 they can gain enough in 2020 to have a reasonable
chance to take back the US Senate best White House briefing room special guest
dr. Ronnie Jackson now the former presidential physician quite the year
first he briefed the press about president Trump's physical health which
case you were wondering is totally completely perfect 10 out of 10 he has a
lot a lot of energy he's 71 years old and his bilateral and corrected vision
is 2030 is very sharp and you know he's very articulate when he speaks to me no
concerns about his cognitive ability when asked how a borderline obese man on
cholesterol-lowering medication could still be considered in excellent health
Jackson had this to say it's called genetics I don't know a
trump-like that what a surprise so he nominated Jackson to lead the VA
that went less well Jackson withdrew his nomination in April after a flurry of
allegations about his professional conduct worst PR advice Cindy hyde-smith
campaign team whoever told Cindy hyde-smith to stick to her statement
after a gaffe in which she said of a supporter quote if he invited me to a
public hanging I'd be on the front row you did bad that advice led to this
epically cringe-worthy public appearance by the appointed Mississippi senator why
people as they should not see it as offensive we put out the statement
yesterday and it's available and we stand by that statement
I put out a statement yesterday and that's all I'm gonna say about it yowsa
biggest surprise out of the Muller probe Paul Mann affords ostrich coat why tell
you about Paul man affords $15,000 ostrich coat when I can show you
Paul man affords $15,000 an ostrich coat
okay I mean it does kind of just look like a coat but it was a $15,000 coat so
you know it's nice which is why prosecutors in the case against Trump's
former campaign chairman worked very hard to show it to the jury as evidence
of mana for its lavish lifestyle maybe because of the coat maybe not but manna
fort was found guilty on eight counts of tax and bank fraud in August best
instance of history repeating repeating quote but her emails
evanka addition know if your last name is trump and you work in the White House
the only thing you definitely can't do is use a private email address to do
government business what's simple just that one thing
and yet that's exactly what a funky Trump eldest daughters of the president
and senior advisor at the White House did in 2017 when called on her private
email use Ivanka told White House officials wait for it she was unaware of
the rules governing use of private emails to do official business so the
idea of lock her up doesn't apply to you know which and I checked with science on
this one it's literally impossible given that her father's but the entire 2016
campaign savaging hillary clinton for using a private email server to do
business while serving as Secretary of State
serenity now and here's one fun superlative fact that we need to end on
an eighth grade I was named Best Dressed boy here's your big takeaway
superlatives are stupid and also very much in the eye of the beholder and that
is the point we do this twice a week every week including in 2019
check back for new episodes every Tuesday and Thursday