what's up everybody it's Chris so just a little intro to this video this is going
to be another audio chapter from my book cancelled and this was one of the
chapters I was most scared to write so I just want to explain my motives and
intentions behind this and you might call me a liar and say I'm doing it to
hurt somebody else or whatever I understand that I can't force anybody to
believe me but when I decided to write this book I wanted to not only take back
my narrative but I really wanted to give people an in-depth look on canceled
culture like it's not just a bunch of strangers saying ridiculous things about
you but the the man I'm talking about in this video I considered a friend and he
was the last person I thought would distance himself from me and it hurt it
hurt a lot so what you're about to listen to in this chapter I understand
I empathize why he did it he had this happen to him and it happened to me so I
know what it does to you mentally and he had to distance himself for his own
mental and emotional well-being but this is me sharing my experience but here's
the thing so why am I putting it on YouTube why am I putting in a YouTube
format well if you put watching my videos I explained kicking off this
whole series that I came to the realization that people who watch
YouTube don't read books alright so there's nothing that I'm putting out
here that hasn't already been discussed months ago in this book but I know many
of you don't read books so I decided to put this as well as some other chapters
in a video format but here's the thing and and I when I was released in the
book and when I realized that I bunch of drama channels were gonna read
my book as well I was like they're gonna figure out who I'm talking about and
they're gonna go after him and I don't want that to happen but here's the thing
I mentioned this in my last video about the right opinion I'm pretty sure most
the people who claim they've read my book haven't because I was preparing to
make videos defending this person or making statements defending this person
when the drama community attacked him and it never happened
so people you know from the drama community like it proves to me that they
never read my book because I was so worried that once they read this chapter
they were going to use it as a weapon towards this guy so before I let you go
and let you listen to this chapter I just want to say a few things do not go
attack this man if you if you do like you're no better than anybody else and I
don't want you part of my community I still believe in my heart that this is a
very good person and I think much like myself there was false narratives
created about him I feel like he he did this as a form of self-preservation
which is a part of human nature and what we got to do to protect ourselves I
forgive him and I hope you forgive him too I'm glad that he's had a lot of
success recently but anyways here's the chapter chapter 20 during my time on
YouTube I have a pretty good track record of being against canceled culture
it comes from my addiction background I don't think there are many people who
should not be forgiven hell I even said Logan Paul deserved our forgiveness the
next person that I thought was a good friend is someone who is not only a
creator who was targeted by canceled culture but they're also another man in
recovery I hate to say it but I hold much higher standards for people in
recovery the reason is because not everyone goes through therapy or
actively tries to become a better person but those of us in recovery are forced
to others I often think well they just don't know any better but someone like
this definitely does this creator was someone who was in the drama community
that I absolutely loved when I made the transition to try and tie mental health
topics with the drama going on I absolutely loved this man's content
he wasn't just sitting there talking about all the drama and how awful
everyone was he had a ton of compassion he always tried to give people the
benefit of the doubt and believe that people should be forgiving he also has
an incredible work ethic which I admire he and I talked a few times through dm's
about being people and recovery but not much more
I also learned that like me although he wasn't a licensed therapist he had a
background working in addiction treatment much like myself my theory is
that other people in the dorama community felt that he thought he was
better than them I just saw him as someone who was trying to add another
layer to the drama by giving people something that may help them out in
their own lives as well also like myself he was doing great before canceled
culture came for him he was gaining subscribers and was loved by many a lot
of my subscribers begged us to do a collab because they saw us so much in
common with our channels unfortunately someone who he considered
a friend in the drama community turned on him I watched both sides of the story
and it just seemed like the other person got upset over some silly stuff that
could have been handled in a conversation rather than an exposed
video I thought he'd be able to weather this storm because he had a previous
controversy the year before but everyone came to his defense this time was
different much like what happened to me that drama channels ganged up on him one
of the drama channels even made a video about him that was over an hour long and
so did a watcher video but I had to turn it off because there was so much
misinformation in the first 20 minutes of the video much like what eventually
happened to me you have people who don't understand the mental health profession
or laws and they're trying to Google their answers in an effort to ruin
someone's life since people would rather believe drama
instead of doing their own research this creator was cancelled when I saw this
happen I reach out to him to let him know how sorry I was that it was
happening to him I let him know that I knew everything she said in that video
about him like lying about being a councillor was ridiculous and anyone
with knowledge of the mental health field would know how wrong she was while
the entire community was going against him I decided that I was going to stand
up for him I ended up making a video discussing his situation and explaining
to people my views on it and saying that he wasn't a bad person he thanked me in
private for standing up for him but he didn't want to say anything publicly
like many others he just wanted all of this nonsense to die down as time went
on we ended up becoming better friends we chatted more and dm's and then we
swapped phone numbers we talked on the phone and I'd be there for him while he
was going through all of the canceling process and I'd give him encouragement
we talked about recovery and how things were going to turn out all right then
the initial rumbling started to happen where you could tell that drama channels
were going to come after me at first he was there for me he talked to me more
and had my back the way I had his back during his situation and I really
appreciated it he even told me that he had some dirt on other Creators if I
needed it but I declined because that's not something I wanted to do this was
right around the time I went to California for some other collabs and he
happened to be out there too so we were going to link up to do a video together
we didn't end up making this video together because our schedules had
changed and he had to make a flight weeks after the trip to California is
when everything blew up he talked to me a little but as the snowball effect
continued to get bigger and bigger he talked to me less like the previous
young woman I discussed who had been through the same thing I was going
through he had mentioned before that he didn't want to go through it again as he
slowly stopped replying to my DMS and text I knew what was happening like I
said earlier this one was different because he's someone else in recovery
not only that but the same people who went after him were all coming after me
when he stopped talking to me completely I felt even more alone and more betrayed
because of how much I defended him during his own controversy a couple
months passed and the James Charles versed hottie Westbrook drama happened
during that time he was still making videos and kind of steering clear of the
other drama channels and he was doing fairly well but then things went really
well when he started covering the James
Charles situation his video started blowing up again I remember how he told
me about how much money he had lost from this controversy and he even had
sponsorship deals fall through so I was happy that things were starting to go
well for him again not only was he starting to get views again but he was
also gaining a ton of subscribers he went from about a hundred thirty
thousand subscribers to over two hundred thousand subscribers pretty damn quick
and it was awesome to see I even sent him a text saying how happy I was for
him that things were starting to turn around but like always he didn't reply
not long after the James Charles situation there was all of the news
about the issues between Nicki Caudill avocado
and Trisha Paytas in which she ghosted Nick I was following this story and I
watched one of this creators videos and sent him the following text here's what
happened me so I watched your new video and I'm feeling pretty weird about it
you're talking about how Trisha goes to Nick and he held on to that pain for so
long and how has happened to you but you haven't been talking to me I want to
keep this between us and not go public so I'm messaging you I've looked to you
as a mentor type in the community many people have disappeared on me and
distanced themselves publicly because of the drama that happened to me a couple
months ago but it bums me out that you haven't talked to me since you've been
through this as well and not going to lie it hurts as well because I had your
back throughout the whole time the drama community was attacking you he replied
with this hey Chris okay I feel you deserve an answer and since you promised
me you would keep it between us all explain when all of the drama was
happening with you the focus was immediately put on me and I couldn't go
through it again I honestly didn't trust that if we talked you wouldn't tell
people that I was being supportive which would directly affect me I could not
justify or defend some of the things you had done when I talked to my sponsor
about it she suggested I distance myself from you
in the situation for my own mental well-being unless you reached out to me
for sobriety support which I always offered as well as my firmly believing
in the responsibility statement of a a that didn't happen so I didn't respond
and it's been hard but I never publicly said anything against you I'm trying my
hardest to learn from my mistakes of the past and be a better person and you do
deserve an answer I'm not mad at you I don't hate you I think you made some
poor decisions I have gone through hell on YouTube and that is not your
responsibility but I just couldn't go through it again I hope to some degree
as human beings that make sense and you understand I replied with I accept your
apology I totally get it and I figured that was the situation I definitely made
some mistakes but when shit hit the fan a lot of Lies got spread and people were
blowing things out of proportion it got to a point where people were saying I
told a suicidal person to kill themselves
and they tried ruining my mom's career but again I totally get why you had to
do that and sponsors know best so I have no ill feelings towards you and just
want to remain friends finally he replied Kris every video out there about
me is threaded in lies the ramifications of those lies had directly affected me
way past YouTube in social media and has been a mess for me which is why I
decided not to address it or partake in it further I wish you all the best I am
sorry I didn't respond before I honestly didn't know what to say without getting
pulled into it and like I said I'm always here for you as a sober person
back to the book it's been difficult because we're taught from a young age to
treat others the way you'd like to be treated
something I learned in my sobriety was that my expectations lead to a lot of my
problems so for a long time I had no expectations of people the problem is
that is part of human nature we expect that when we're there for people they'll
be there for us when we need them I also expect those who have been
through what I'm going through to empathize even more I thought that
because he had every one of his friends leave
when his controversy happened that he'd be there for me but I was wrong one of
the biggest problems with canceled culture and sometimes humanity in
general is that we're all just in it for ourselves we put ourselves first and
trust me I teach people that they need to put themselves first when it comes to
their mental health as well as their sobriety but there's a certain point
many of us get to where we can begin helping others working in the treatment
center I had a ton of bad days and things affecting my mental health but I
knew I had to be there for others during the most difficult times of their lives
it's one of the reasons I worked so hard on my mental health so I can be there
for other people I feel bad for them though since I've been through it I know
why he's afraid to get pulled back into it it's traumatizing I was serious when
I said I forgave him but someone needs to break this cycle and that's why I'm
writing this book and will continue to defend people when they get cancelled I
just can't live with the idea of whenever someone gets canceled in the
future it's the norm to bail on them I want to set a precedent that when
someone gets cancelled we defend them I hope we can quit being selfish and
realize that standing up for what's right is more important than our own
reputation because if we don't have our integrity what do we have when I
defended him during his drama was I worried about the hate mob attacking me
of course I was but that fear was not stronger than my drive to stand up for
what is right and if you're reading this book I hope you start doing the same
thing for your friends