The Miz is your new Intercontinental Champion!
DX give the Revival ‘the rub’!
And The Undertaker says some stuff!
I’m Oli Davis, and this is Raw’s 25th Anniversary episode ...in about 4 minutes,
but probably 5.
Absolute Stunner After opening retro-style at the Manhattan
Center, ICOPRO banner and all, Raw then kicked off proper with Stephanie and Shane McMahon
saying we all have to thank one man for bringing us so much wrestling joy throughout the years.
So let’s give a big welcome to Kevin Dun-I mean, Vince McMahon!
Vince said he’s not one to pat himself on the back - mainly because of the rest of the
throwaway nostalgia show would do that for him - but then morphed into his heel Mr McMahon
character for the night’s best segment.
Which brought out Stone Cold Steve Austin to not just stunner Shane, but also Vince
too.
That, sadly though, was where the In Awe stuff ended.
The Women’s Division Next up was Asuka, Mickie James, Sasha Banks
and Bayley beating Mandy Rose, Sonya Deville, Nia Jax and Alicia Fox - because WWE appear
to have given up on Absolution as a rogue faction.
Fox tapped to the Bank Statement, remembering the actual finish for once, and then Asuka
threw her own teammates over the top rope.
A lame bout, but a cool post-match angle to build the Women’s Rumble.
NostalgiaMania As fun as all the WWE Legend cameos were,
quantity far exceeded quality.
In the next few segments we had Brother Love, Teddy Long, Torrie Wilson, the Brooklyn Brawler,
Jonathan Coachman (COME ON COACHMAN!), Torrie Wilson, the Boogeyman, John Laurinaitis, William
Regal, Eric Bischoff and Torrie Wilson all get barely a line each.
Torrie Wilson, in particular, deserved much more screen time.
Undertaker Promo Package But oddly the most underwhelming was The Undertaker’s
long hyped WWE return - the Manhattan Center trading in smoke and darkness for house lights
and disappointment.
Rather than start an angle or say anything of substance, he just mysteriously said: “For
all of those who have fallen, it is truly time you rest in peace.”
Which isn’t conclusive enough to act as another retirement, or teasing enough to build
any excitement.
The Miz beat Roman Reigns Raw’s most promoted match then came at the
start of the second hour.
The Miz and Roman Reigns work together very well, and after some Miztourage shenanigans
and an exposed turnbuckle, The Miz beat Roman to become an 8 time Intercontinental Champion.
A fun match, and a good result for all those involved.
Christian Peep Show: Seth Rollins & Jason Jordan
In another lacklustre legend return, Christian hardly featured in his Peep Show segment once
guests Seth Rollins and Jason Jordan came out.
Jordan’s heat was fantastic, though, with the crowd barely letting him speak for all
the boos.
The Bar then came out for a brawl, and Rollins accidentally kneed Jordan in the face.
Bray Wyatt beat Woken Matt Hardy Meanwhile, at the Manhattan Center Raw viewing
party, they’re actually getting a match!
Bray Wyatt and Woken Matt Hardy finally clashed after over a month of feuding...in a short
match that Bray won clean, which was very disappointing.
Elias & John Cena After bumping into Chris Jericho backstage
- who got one of the loudest pops of the night - Elias trashed the WWE legends and - even
more criminally - Jimmy Fallon in the front row.
This brought out John Cena, presumably starting a feud between the two, replacing the one
Cena was supposed to have with Samoa Joe.
Elias got the better of Cena, giving him a low blow and smashing a guitar over his back.
NostalgiaMania II NostalgiaMania ran wild through the night
with JBL hazing younger wrestlers backstage.
I mean, various legends dropping in on an APA poker game - featuring Ted DiBiase, Jeff
Hardy, and a blink-and-you’ll-miss-him MVP.
This culminated in Titus Worldwide accusing Heath Slater of cheating, which turned into…
Titus Worldwide vs Rhyno & Heath Slater A match between the two teams.
It was quickly called off though - partly because the brawl got out of control, and
partly because the Dudley Boys needed to put Heath Slater through a table.
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING!
In one of the most awkward transitions we’ll see all year, Generic WWE Interviewer No.
3 observed: “Wow, the Dudley Boys really are one of
the greatest teams of all time.
Speaking of great, here’s The Phenomenal AJ Styles.”
Segue!
AJ rightfully kicked Generic Interviewer off for her complete opposite: the super charismatic
asker of real questions Mean Gene Okerlund.
Sadly, Styles used Mean Gene’s time to try and make ‘Kami’ happen.
DX Return Meanwhile, back at the Manhattan Center - don’t
worry, WWE forgot they were running a show there too - Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Road
Dogg, Billy Gunn and X-Pac came out as DX to thank the fans, and then turned it into
a Kliq reunion, bringing out Scott Hall for a Too Sweet.
Because they can hear Too Sweets from up to 16 miles away, the Balor Club turned up to
do the hand gesture with them, while the Young Bucks cried in each others arms at home.
Galanderson beat The Revival This turned into Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson
quickly beating The Revival.
And as last week’s show predictably set up, this led to Dash and Dawson to be hit
with each guy’s finisher.
It gives the Balor Club a good rub, but sadly it was at the expense of The Revival.
Royal Rumble Go-Home The big angle to close not just Raw’s 25th
anniversary, but also serve as the hot go-home cliffhanger for the Royal Rumble, was a very
lacklustre brawl between Kane, Brock Lesnar and Braun Strowman - where Brock F5’d Kane,
and Strowman put Lesnar through the announcer’s table.
Unlike Raw’s 1000th episode, which was notable for CM Punk’s heel turn on The Rock, WWE
appear to have treated the 25th anniversary as a throwaway nostalgia clip show.
After months of build and hype, we were treated to a fantastic opening, inconsequential matches,
occasionally inspired backstage segments, but ultimately confusing and frustrating booking.
Which, in a way, captures the highs and lows of Raw’s 25 years rather well.
So that was this week’s Raw in about four minutes.
Vote in the poll above my head to give your rating, where you can choose from - In Awe,
Cor, AVRAWGE, Poor and Bore.
Usually, this episode would be a Cor.
But because of the build and it being the Royal Rumble go-home show, I expected considerably
more.
This week’s Raw is Poor.
What are 25 Raw facts you probably didn’t know?!
Click the screen now for more great wrestling videos.