[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] >> Stephen: GIVE IT UP FOR
LOUIS CATO AND THE LATE SHOW BAND, EVERYBODY.
RIGHT OVER THERE. LOUIS, THIS EVENING, WE HAVE YET
ANOTHER, WE HAVE ANOTHER, YET ANOTHER SPECIAL GUEST THIS
EVENING. PLEASE REMIND EVERYBODY WHO IS
SITTING IN ON THE SACKS OVER THERE.
>> Louis: ON THE TENOR SAXOPHONE, FRIEND OF THE BAND OF
THE SHOW. >> Stephen: I ALSO HAVE A
SPECIAL GUEST TONIGHT. I HAVE THE STAR OF THE NEW TV
SHOW ON CBS ON THURSDAY NIGHTS, CARRIE PRESTON FROM ELSBETH.
IN JUST A FEW MOMENTS SITTING RIGHT OVER THERE ONE OF MY
FAVORITE BROADCASTERS OUT THERE FROM "ALL IN WITH CHRIS HAYES,"
CHRIS HAYES WILL BE RIGHT OVER THERE.
FOLKS, I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS I IT.
I LOVE AMERICA. [CHEERS]
BUT IT'S BEEN BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THERE ARE OTHER
COUNTRIES OUT THERE. MEXICO, JAPAN, BARBIELAND.
THEY'VE JUST BEEN THROUGH A TERRIBLE CIVIL WAR.
SOMETIMES FOR YOU I LIKE TO CHECK IN WITH WHAT'S HAPPENING
ABROAD IN MY BRAND NEW INTERNATIONALLY-BROADCAST
SEGMENT... ♪ ♪
>> "WHAT'S GOING ON OVER THERE." >> Stephen: THE PEOPLE ALREADY
KNOW. WE'VE NEVER DONE BEFORE AND THEY
ALREADY KNOW IT. HOW DO THEY KNOW IT.
TONIGHT'S FIRST DESTINATION. DEUTSCHLAND,
THE BIG SCHNITZEL, THE COUNTRY SO NICE,
WE DEFEATED IT TWICE. LAST WEEK, GERMANY LEGALIZED
RECREATIONAL CANNABIS USE. JA WOL.
THIS IS GOING TO HAVE MAJOR EFFECTS ON GERMAN CULTURE.
THEY'VE ALREADY GOT OKTOBERFEST, NOW THEY NEED TO ADD
"SMOKE-VEMBERFEST" "WEED-CEMBERFEST,"
"GET REALLY INTO PHISH-UARY." OKAY, EVERYBODYBACK ON THE TOUR
BUS, 'CAUSE NEXT WE'RE GONNA FIND OUT...
>> WHAT'S GOING ON IN SCOTLAND? >> Stephen: SCOTLAND!
WHERE A LOT OF INTERESTING AND VITALLY IMPORTANT NEWS STORIES
ARE OCCURRING ON A DAILY BASIS. BUT ALSO THIS.
EL CHAPO'S GRANDDAUGHTER HAS JOINED THE HUNT FOR THE LOCH
NESS MONSTER WHILE ROMPING THROUGH SCOTLAND.
[APPLAUSE] THAT IS THE LAST TIME I GET MY
NEWS FROM MAD LIBS. YOU KNOW THEIR SLOGN,
"ALL THE NEWS THAT'S AQUARIUM TO FART."
APPARENTLY EL CHAPO'S GRANDDAUGHTER HAS BEEN
INSTAGRAMING HER SCOTTISH VACATION, POSTING PICS AT
A JOHNNY WALKER WHISKEY TASTING AND HITTING THE HIGHLANDS FOR
A BOAT TRIP ON LOCH NESS TO LOOK FOR ITS LEGENDARY RESIDENT.
IT'S THE MOST FUN DRUG LORD RELATED VACATION SINCE
THE DOUBLE DECKER BUS TOURS HOSTED BY PABLO ESCOBAR.
AND THERE'S MORE NEWS FROM THE LAND OF SQUEALING BAGPIPES.
>> WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON IN SCOTLAND?
>> Stephen: LAST WEEKEND IN GLASGOW, A WILLY WONKA-INSPIRED
EXPERIENCE WAS BROUGHT TO A HALT FOLLOWING COMPLAINTS IT WAS
"AN ABSOLUTE SHAMBLES OF AN EVENT."
AFTER FAMILIES TRAVELING FROM ALL OVER, PAYING $40 A TICKET
FOR AN "EXHILARATING AND IMMERSIVE ADVENTURE" CALLED
WILLY'S CHOCOLATE EXPERIENCE. STILL BETTER THAN THE ENGLISH
ATTRACTION, SPOTTED DICK'S CUSTARD EXPLOSION.
GOOD OLD. VISITORS WERE PROMISED GIANT
MUSHROOMS, CANDY CANES, AND CHOCOLATE FOUNTAINS, BUT INSTEAD
WERE MET WITH BASICALLY AN EMPTY WAREHOUSE AND EXTREMELY SAD
OOMPALOOMPAS. YOU ALL KNOW THEIR SONG.
♪ OOMPA LOOMPA OOMPA DEE DEE DEE ♪
♪ WHY DID I GO TO THEA-TER SCHOOL ♪
THE EVENT, WHICH AGAIN, WAS LABELED A "CHOCOLATE
EXPERIENCE" WAS SO POORLY ORGANIZED, PERFORMERS GAVE
THE CHILDREN ONE JELLY BEAN EACH AND A QUARTER CUP OF LEMONADE.
AND GUESTS WERE ALSO TREATED, FOR SOME REASON, TO A COMPLETELY
MADE-UP VILLAIN, AN EVIL CHOCOLATE MAKER
WHO LIVES IN THE WALLS CALLED "THE UNKNOWN."
HERE'S A LOOK. >> WHAT IS THAT?
>> IT'S THE UNKNOWN. >> NO!
>> Stephen: "WAIT, WAIT, WHY ARE YOU CRYING, BUDDY?
IT'S THE BELOVED CHILDREN'S CHARACTER: SEX CREEP FROM
"EYES WIDE SHUT"! WHERE ARE WE GOING NEXT, GLOBY?
>> BUON GIORNO, JARED LEHTO. >> Stephen: ITALY!
THE NORTHERN PROVINCE OF BOLZANO IS TRYING TO CRACKDOWN ON THE
SCOURGE OF DOG POOP IN THE STREETS AND HAS ORDERED ALL DOGS
TO BE DNA TESTED. THE TEST RESULTS WILL BE
INSERTED INTO A DATABASE, WHICH POLICE CAN THEN REFER TO
IN THEIR SEARCH FOR THE CULPRITS AND THEIR OWNERS.
[CHEERING] IT'LL ALL BE COVERED IN THE NEW
ITALIAN COP DRAMA. >> IN THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE
SYSTEM, THE PEOPLE ARE REPRESENED BY TWO SEPARATE YET
EQUALLY IMPORTANT GROUPS: THE POLICE AND THE GUYS WHO HAVE
TO DNA-TEST THE POOP. I SWEAR IT'S A REAL JOB, MOM!
POOP-POOP. >> Stephen: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH CHRIS HAYES, EVERYBODY. ♪ ♪