'She's awake now take her to the other cave we made the one with no exit.'
Welcome back to my Dark Corner of this Sick World.
‘Do you think there are little green men?’
From Phil Tucker, the man who brought you Robot Monster,
comes The Cape Canaveral Monsters that starts with a pair of alien energy balls arriving on earth.
‘I told you we could find suitable bodies here’
They follow their chosen targets.
Travelled across the universe but they have to hitch a lift on a car bumper.
Unfortunately this leads to the car crashing and
‘Your arm!’
Oh dear.
‘I’ll take it and sew it back at the laboratory’
This pair of alien bodysnatchers are here to disrupt rocket launches.
Leaving scientists baffled...
‘For this there is no reason. There is just no reason’
and leaping to conclusions.
‘Flying saucers or something like that’
This idea comes from "student" Tom.
‘Only the young are so very sure’
and he is roundly mocked for it.
‘You think because he is young I should spare my tongue’
although professor Von Hoften may not like him because he is making eyes at the professor’s niece, Sally,
who is fine with it.
‘After all, this isn’t Germany’
Yeah, it’s not Germany.
‘I didn’t mean that.’
Maybe it is Germany. I don’t know where I am.
Anyway, back to the blown up rocket.
‘Tomorrow we make another shot’
Eh, we got plenty of rockets. I could do this all week.
Meanwhile in the grounds, the guard dogs have been chasing an alien intruder and...
‘Your arm. It has been torn off again’
Can you not be more careful?
‘What the hell is it?’
It’s an arm. I know you’re not a biologist but come on.
'I’ll see that it gets back to intelligence’
Okay, but they’ll tell you the same thing; it’s an arm.
The aliens check in with the revolving pancake they answer to back home
‘How long before the next missile test?’
and we learn of their terrible plans
‘How is the invasion fleet progressing?’
They’re also abducting humans to send back home for experiments.
‘We need more human subjects. Particularly females’
At the same time, Tom and Sally are double dating with friends.
‘Told you she looks cute without her glasses’
Huge compliment in 1960. But the alien transmission disrupts their music.
#Radio static over light piano music#
'There it is again. Static like a transmitter being turned on and off.'
There’s only one logical explanation.
‘Well I think we’d better tell your uncle about it. This may have something to do with the missiles.’
Shall we tell him now? No, let’s wait till we’ve lost another.
#OH DEAR GOD! OH HUMANITY#
But Tom’s theory is dismissed
‘Just because Tom isn’t 40 years old’
True, but he is 30, can we stop pretending he’s a teenager,
honestly every film we look at, was there no one under 25 in 1960.
‘Maybe I’m dreaming all this’
The ‘youngsters’ return the following night and the other couple are left alone.
‘I’ll protect you’
I’d like to see them get past this.
The roof as well, give the aliens a chance.
'What is it Tom?'
'I thought I heard something.'
While their friends are taken, Tom and Sally make an astonishing discovery .
‘There’s a pool of water in there. I wonder if it has anything to do with the…’
I like to think that the actor didn’t finish that sentence because
even he found the idea that a pool of water in the mountains was suspicious
and probably related to radio interference and sabotaged rockets, too ridiculous to say.
‘I knew we should have proceeded instead of talking’
The aliens have now finished with one of their abductees
‘You were right about his lack of life force. He’s dead’
That would certainly leave me with a lack of life force.
But waste not want not, alien Hauron needs an arm and, for some reason, a chin.
‘His chin to replace yours’
There are so many of these carbon copy alien invasion films they really need something different for us to bother and weirdly, the severed arm was it.
‘Now that arm must be replaced’
Once he gets his arm back I totally lost interest.
Tom and Sally are captured, with Sally’s feminine carelessness letting the side down
‘When Tom doesn’t show up for the test this morning’
‘Oh, a missile test?’
while Tom’s masculine intellect outwits the aliens
'No Tom don't say anything...'
#Pig Latin, I tried to translate, but I have not idea.#
‘What language is that you speak?’
Who naturally don’t kill them.
‘Why not now?’
‘Their science can be of use to us. Perhaps the tool by which they die’
and whose attitude to captivity is; now you two behave yourselves while we’re gone.
‘I don’t think there’s anything here you can hurt. Alright Nadja, let’s get into the tank’
While the aliens backs are turned they are defeated via a 2 minute chemistry lesson
‘Now if add sodium chloride to a hydrogen base...’
'You release heat as a side product in the in the amount of 1300 Calories per mole.'
‘Now if I remember correctly polyethylene is an unstable compound’
Now I don’t anything about chemistry but my Dad is a research chemist...
'Now the sodium chloride is easy,'
'The polyethylene is easy too, all of yu have wallets, well the inserts are made of it.'
'Some of you have plastic belts.'
So I checked with him to see if it possible to make a bomb from table salt and a plastic wallet.
'No.'
And it seemed so well researched.
I don't think so. ‘There are plenty of guys my age who are a lot smarter’
And the aliens would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for those meddling adults.
I think I might have used that joke before.
Thanks for watching. For more alien invasion reviews click here.
What are the little quirky touches that can liven up an otherwise dreary film? Let us know in the comments below.
'The leader decides who returns to our planet and when.'