You ever gone to a class and taken a test
and you seriously have
NO CLUE
as to what you're looking at on the page?
Start looking around the room, everybody's writing except for you.
I hate that feeling.
And then the teacher says, "Okay when you're done you can turn in your test
and leave,"
so you went for like five minutes and then you turn your test and the teacher
gives you that look.
You get the tests back the next time you go to class and
BOW!
Big ol' fat F then you say "Bump this i'm studying!"
But if you're like me, you suffer from chronic procrastination and you wait 'til the night before,
To even open your book to study, And you study like a BOSS
Like you cram sesh in a fex
You get that book open and your studying for hours. You quiz yourself
You cover up the answer, and you read yourself the question, You start hyping yourself up
Like "What!? I'm gonna kill this test!"
Take the test and BLAW! Big ol' fat F so I start doing what some of you guys have
Probably done at some point, I.
Cheat.
Yes, I check my emails and I see what some of you ladies are saying "Swoozie, Tell us stories
About the old you"
I know exactly what you're trying to say, you're trying to say "Swoozie, tell us about
when you was a bad boy. Becuz i like the bad boys."
I'm gonna give you that today
Here we go I, Cheat. but I did it wrong at first I did what I call now
"Freestyle Cheating" where you just kind of turn your head and peak off the person
Next to you's paper. But, see, I learned you can't do it like that there's too many
Random Variables but people write their answers all tiny and small you can't
even read it. And it used to frustrate the crap out of me like how am i supposed to cheat off of you, If
your answer looks like Braille." People used to either write too tiny, or they were just
Too sloppy. Cuz the sloppier your writing is, the longer i have to stare at your paper
To figure out whatever your chicken scratch means. And it makes it pretty obvious that i'm trying to cheat.
It would make me so mad,
I would just wanna take my pencil and throw it at them, Then run over and rip up the test
How am I gonna cheat off you when your handwriting looks like the alien
Hieroglyphics from Lost
Look, right there. You even drew a bird and the numbers from the hatch
So, I try to Freestyle Cheat and get my test back and
And, BLAW! big ol' fat F. I gave up. I was like "Bump it.
I'm gonna fail this dumb class, I don't care anymore." But the next test that we had
I started noticing some sketchiness going on in the class.
Questionable sounds like people coughing and sniffling. How come Shayan
always develop these flu symptoms. Every time there's a test and then I saw it she
coughed and like 8 people around her all of a sudden would write down an answer and
then she'd sniffle and the same 8 would write another answer and I'm like,
"What the Flux Capacitor is going on here. This is a Multiple Choice test. These people are cheating!"
I look over at the teacher, totally oblivious as to what's going on.
I'm like, "Bump this. Everybody else is cheating, they didn't include me on this,
Oh no it's not going down like this." So I devised a plan. First thing I knew I needed, Accomplices.
So, i got my friend Paul and I got my friend Josh. I was going to be The Point Man,
Paul is going to be The Diversion, and Josh, Josh didn't do squat he's got a free ride
So in History class, That day before we actually took the test he would ask us
Some of the questions from the Answer Key and i watch him, Real carefully
He'd go up to the Podium, and he'd always take the answer key with him
And it was all multiple choice. And at the end of class he would always leave the answer key up there.
All right, so then i get Paul and Josh and i explain my master plan to 'em.
Blueprints, Charts. And I go Michael Scofield Prison Break on these kids.
So, the day before test, He gets up like he normally does, go to the front Podium
starts asking us a bunch of questions,
the bell rings, he goes back to his desk, and his name is Mr. Masters. Me (Swoozie Boy) and Paul
will give the little signal
Paul walks over to him and he's like, "Mr. Masters I have some questions about the
Embargo Act of 1807
so then I activate phase 2 - I walk over to the podium and I open up the answer key
and flip to the questions are going to be on tomorrow's test and I start
talking all loud
ok attention class i'm going to read off all the answers to the test
BBC DA
BBDC Mr. Masters looks up like, "What are you doing!?" I'm like don't worry don't wor-
*scoff*
Nobody's gonna hear me who's gonna sit here and memorize all these answers
anyway AA BBC C se- see there's nobody here
So he just shakes his head and go back to answer in Paul's question unbeknownst to
the teacher
I've got a tape recorder tucked away in my pocket recording all the answers
BOOM (can't tell him nuffin')
It's not cheating it's giving yourself a successful advantage
Like a BOWSE
*boss
Me, Paul, and Josh meet out on the patio
it's time to memorize this bad boy take a wild guess we do next
we turn those answers into a rap song
WHAT.
LET'S GO
B B C (yeah)
A (yeah) D D (yeah)
A C B (yeah)
B C B *igh* *igh*
Next day we walk into class
We bout to handle our
BIZZNASS
*business
Stone cold
Game faces on it's go time
We all sit on opposite ends of the class cuz we know
we bout to get A's what you gonna do about it you can't say
NAFFIN
*nothing
But see now when i start taking these tests everybody thinks I'm crazy cuz i'm
sitting there mumbling to myself like
*scats, beat boxes, idk*
no mercy
Get the test back
BLAOW!
Big ol' fat A
"The teacher's job is to grade the student's mind, not the paper." - Swoozie 2011
Think about that.
And that's how we justify it
We weren't cheating,
we were collaborating.
Tiger blood? Forget tiger blood running through your viens
we got ninja blood on deck
There was one more collaboration that went down but if you guys promise not to do any
collaborating / cheating
in the meantime I'll tell you guys that story in an upcoming video
Caption Editors:
PRIXGAME
Kenia Sanders
Tia Kitty
Anmol yadav
Volume
& KingJon37
okbye