Hi, Matt!
Hi.
How are you doing?
I'm good.
How are you doing?
[CHEERING]
This is, like, livelier than normal.
Yeah, well, they didn't know you were here.
This is a surprise.
Oh, OK.
So they had no idea.
[CHEERING]
Oh, great.
So it's a little bit livelier.
It's always this lively, but a tiny bit.
How's the family?
Great, great.
Everybody, the kids and everybody's great.
So I saw pictures you went to Australia.
I did.
That wasn't your first time?
No, no, I've been there before.
But it was the first time I went to Byron Bay.
We were visiting Chris Hemsworth and his family.
Because we're all friends.
I mean, you and Chris Hemsworth, people
would freak out to see the two of you together walking around.
Well, I mean, I kind of hide pretty well.
Like, he can't hide at all.
Yeah, he's a big guy.
He's a big guy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He sticks out in a crowd.
Yeah.
And a nice guy too.
He's-- yeah, he's great.
The whole family, just really good brothers, right?
Good genes.
Yeah, they're great.
Yeah, I've become buddies with all three of the brothers.
The whole family is great.
Yeah.
So and you hung out in-- did you go like snorkeling and scuba
diving and all that stuff?
Are you--
We went to the beach.
We took the kids to the beach.
It was funny because Australia is
famous for having a lot of poisonous things.
And you know, and I'm telling my kids, don't worry.
It's fine.
And Chris is like, oh, it'll be fine.
Don't worry about it.
Come on over.
Yeah.
And my daughter, my six-year-old got stung by a jellyfish worse
than anything.
It was the worst thing.
Oh, man.
I mean, even Chris said he was like,
mate, that's the worst thing I've ever seen in my life.
Yeah.
Like, it was really bad.
Where'd she get stung?
She was-- she was in a little bit of surf, like in about
a foot or two of water.
So just like her leg?
No, I think she--
this thing like literally wrapped around her.
It was this little blue bottle with these long tentacles
that, I mean, I could show you pictures
that would turn your head.
I mean, she had like these looked
like shoelaces, kind of red shoelaces around her body.
So you saw.
It was on her still?
You had to get it off of her?
Oh, yeah.
We pulled it off.
Yeah, yeah.
Did you get stung pulling it off?
Yeah, a little bit, but not like her.
I mean, she was really--
Did you pee on her?
We did not.
In fact-- because that's what they say you're supposed to do.
But--
It's so weird to pee on your daughter.
I mean, I would think--
but just--
Well, you know, she peed on me enough in her life,
so you know.
But no.
In fact, there was enough around her chest
that a lot of the locals said you should actually
call the paramedics, because you can go into shock.
And so they showed up, and they said actually hot water.
Like if you put her in a hot bath
and just gently sponge away.
Because they stick to you with these little needles,
basically.
Man.
Really, really painful.
Well, I'm glad she's OK.
Me too.
Yeah, all right.
So is Halloween a big thing in your house?
Is everybody dressing up?
Are you into it?
Yeah, it's a big thing, and it's bigger than when we were kids.
I mean, it's like now all the parents get dressed up.
Like, it's getting weird.
Theme parties.
Yes.
But you'll take them around trick or treating?
Yes, definitely.
Yeah, and you'll dress as what?
Well, the jellyfish child.
The jellyfish child.
My seven-year-old wanted to be a devil.
And so my wife is going to go as an angel.
And they're going to kind of be like a duo.
And then my nine-year-old wanted to be a cop.
And so she asked if I'd be a robber.
So I think that's what I'm--
Like an old fashioned robber?
Like an old fashioned--
Like with the black thing around?
Exactly, like the Hamburglar.
Yeah, and then the black knit Hamburglar.
Well, you could go as either.
You can decide what you want to be.
Right.
Yeah, the Hamburglar or--
Or just a robber who carries hamburgers, you know.
Yeah, it's good if you're on a long hike or something
to have that.
Because candy doesn't really fill you up.
No, no.
Food is much more-- you need protein.
Yeah, so you're doing this really cool thing.
You and Jimmy Kimmel are having dinner together.
And then people are going to have dinner with the two of you
to raise money for a good cause, right?
Yeah, Jon Stewart is doing Next for Autism.
And we've auctioned off an uncomfortable dinner.
Yeah.
On Omaze.
So you can go on Omaze, and it will
be incredibly uncomfortable.
Where will it be?
Where will you and Jimmy be?
I mean, presumably here in LA somewhere.
I mean, so--
That's clearly Jimmy's house.
Yeah, that's the promotion for it.
And we'll fly whoever it is out.
And it'll just be the three of us for dinner.
So it's one person?
Yeah.
With the three of you.
Oh, that's going to be so awkward.
It's going to be horrible.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
I mean, I hope they're a good conversationalist,
because I don't talk to Jimmy.
No, I know.
It's so great that you all are doing that.
So George Clooney-- now, I think the last time you were here,
I guess I don't know if he had had the twins or not,
but has he changed?
Do you see him as a different guy now, having kids?
Yeah, I mean, I think he finally--
it took him like into his 50s, but I think he grew up finally.
Yeah, yeah.
No, he's loving it.
He's great.
And he's-- yeah, he's a lot calmer than I thought.
With twins, that's really--
That's a lot of work.
Yeah.
But he did confide in me that they went on to solid foods
last week.
And so he's trying to get off diaper duty now.
That's a whole other level.
I didn't know what you meant, and then now I
do know what you mean.
Yes, that--
He was like, diapers are easy.
And I was like, wait for it.
Yeah.
That sounds-- yes, that's a horrible thing.
I forgot about that part of it.
Yeah.
Besides just the crying and sleeping and not sleeping.
I mean, the twins thing, I can't even-- people would say,
do you give him advice?
And I went no.
I mean, two babies at once?
That's horrific.
Yeah, because one cries, and then wakes--
The other one wakes up.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, I couldn't.
I couldn't.
And then you start crying and I just--
And then all of you are crying.
All right, we're going to take a break.
More with Matt after this.
You were shooting this on the lot here.
And you walked out wearing an outfit like that.
And I was asking what you were shooting.
And you had just done a scene, you said,
with Julianne Moore, where you were using a ping pong
paddle to spank her, and your child walked in.
And I was like, what is this movie going to be?
And then I watched it.
And it's really hard to describe what this movie is.
So I'm going to let you do it.
I can't describe it either.
Yeah, it's hard.
Yeah.
No, it's a movie about this--
[LAUGHS]
No, it's the suburbs in the '50s, and this family that
seems to be--
it's kind of a perfect-- picture perfect family,
but it's this very kind of dark, what's
really actually going on.
Yeah.
And part of it's based on a true story, where
an African-American family moved to-- this actually happened
in Levittown, Pennsylvania.
And the entire neighborhood and town
petitioned to have them removed, and harassed them,
and made their life really uncomfortable in an attempt
to get them to leave.
And they stood their ground, and stayed.
Yeah.
It was hard to watch.
That was-- and I knew that was a true story that was really--
so your character does some very disturbing things.
You're not a good guy.
Not so much.
No, not a good guy.
Well, it depends on your perspective.
I guess so, compared to what exactly?
I don't know.
A raving psychopath might think he's great.
So you're riding this little tiny, tiny bike in a scene.
And that had to be hard.
Yeah, and George actually got it smaller, but we had a bike.
And George was like, it's just not small enough.
And here you're watching me trying
to pull away on this thing just with the knees going out.
There was a lot of-- he just-- sometimes
I think this entire thing is just an elaborate prank.
Not really a movie?
The ping pong paddle thing, I'm supposed
to be hitting Julianne, but we realized the angle of the shot,
it actually worked if I just hit myself.
And which was good because I could really hit myself and not
worry that--
I knew how much I was hurting myself,
and I wouldn't hurt Julianne.
And so I actually got home and had a--
I got out of the shower, and my wife went like, oh my God!
And I had a completely discolored right cheek, which--
In the shape of a ping pong paddle?
It wasn't.
I hit it so many times, the whole thing was just--
Oh, man.
It was like purple.
You were really hitting yourself hard.
I was giving it to myself.
Yeah.
You got way into it.
Apparently.
I learned a lot about myself on this movie.
But--
So now that's what you do to yourself in bed?
No, no.
I just-- my wife and I are taking ping pong lessons now.
I see.
I understand.
All right.
We're taking a break, and we're going to play a game.
We'll be back.
We're back with Matt Damon.
And you do a lot for charity.
All month long, we've been partnering with Ulta Beauty
to raise money for breast cancer research.
So we decided to give you a chance
to raise some money by playing our game Pitch Please.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Pitch, please!
All right, so what we're going to do
is you'll be selling a product like they do on QVC.
You won't know what it is, but the audience will.
OK, great.
So I'll ask you questions about the product.
And in the end, if you can guess what it is,
Ulta will donate $20,000.
Oh, fantastic.
OK.
All right, so what you'll be selling-- you'll look at me.
You won't look over there.
No, of course.
This is what you'll be selling.
OK.
So the audience--
Yeah.
I'm so happy about this.
Yes.
Are you proud to sell it?
Well, I am.
Yeah, I am.
That's great.
OK.
You know.
I mean--
What do you-- just tell us mainly what you like about it.
My dad always had a saying with his friends.
He would say, that's a hell of a product.
And when you could find something
that just would make a difference in your life,
you just-- you'd call one of your friends and say, look, I
got a hell of a product here.
Right.
And I want you to know about it.
Right.
So all kinds of things across--
What do you do with it?
I mean--
Well, it depends.
I mean, you can do--
I mean, some people use it more than once a day.
Some people-- I mean, some people--
some people use it once a week.
I mean, it's just kind of--
that's what's great about it is it's versatile,
and it's very user friendly.
Right, right.
And when you use it, does it make you feel happy?
Does it make you feel--
how does it make you feel?
Relaxed.
Yeah.
Which is really the goal.
It's like at the end of a stressful day, you want to--
You want to relax.
You want to kick back and relax a little bit.
But you use it alone, or would you use it with other people?
Oh, both.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right.
And your wife also she loves it?
Well, that's who I heard about it from in the first place.
Yeah.
So she called.
She called me.
I was at work, and she goes, hey, this
is a hell of a product.
Yeah.
[LAUGHS]
How would you care for something like this?
Well--
How do you take care of it?
Well, I mean, I think, look, you take care of your gear,
your gear is going to take care of you.
So you know, I think you want to buff it.
You want to clean it.
You want to oil it.
You just want to keep it ready to go.
Right, right.
Does Jimmy Kimmel know you have this?
Well, Jimmy is not classy enough to have something like this.
This, I can guarantee you, is not something
that Jimmy has or has ever had or used.
Right.
Because you have to be a certain type of person to use this.
Right.
So if Jimmy knew you had this, he'd be so jealous.
Yeah, I mean, he's jealous anyway.
But yes, absolutely.
Yeah.
All right.
Then I think it's time you see what you've been saying.
I have no idea what this is.
That your wife-- that your wife was so happy to tell you about.
And that-- OK, yes.
[APPLAUSE]
I like-- you even gave it a hairy chest.
Oh, it's so wrong.
Oh, that's $20,000 from Ulta.
Suburbicon opens in theaters tomorrow.
We'll be right back.
Matt Damon.
[MUSIC PLAYING]