SO MUCH HAPPENS, SHOPPING, WRAPPING, BAKING, PARTIES.
IT'S EASY TO FORGET THAT FOR MANY, THIS CAN BE A STRESFUL,
LONESOME TIME.
THE SICK OR THOSE REMEMBERING LOST LOVED ONE.
CAROLEE McGRATH SPOKE WITH DR.
STUART ANFANG, CHIEF OF ADULT PSYCHIATRY AT BAYSTATE
MEDICAL CENTER TO HEAR FROM HIM HOW TO COPE WITH ANXIETY AND
DEPRESSION.
>> SO, THAT'S PRETTY COMMON, SOME DEGREE OF ANXIETY AND
DEPRESSION.
REMEMBER, WHEN WE TALK ABOUT THESE THINGS, ANXIETY'S A NORMAL
EMOTION.
THERE'S A REASON WE HAVE ANXIETY.
THE PROBLEM IS WHEN IT BECOMES SO SIGNIFICANT THAT IT CAUSES
FUNCTIONAL IMPAIRMENT AND THAT'S WHEN CONCERN SOME COMES.
IT'S OBVIOUSLY A HECTIC TIME.
PEOPLE ARE PLANNING THINGS, BUYING THINGS.
SOME PEOPLE FIND THE FAMILY TOGETHERNESS STRESSFUL.
THERE IS FOOD AND ALCOHOL AROUND.
IT CAN INCREASE ANXIETY AND MOOD ISSUES.
AT WHAT POINT DOES IT CAUSE FUNCTIONAL IMPAIRMENT WHEN IT
MIGHT BE MAKING IT HARD FOR YOU TO FUNCTION AT WORK OR SCHOOL OR
DOING YOUR EVERY DAY ACTIVITIES.
>> SO, WHAT TO YOU DO IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'VE HIT A WALL OR
EXPLODED?
YOU DON'T ALL THE PRESENTS, YOU DON'T HAVE THE MONEY?
>> THE FIRST THING YOU TO IS STEP BACK, PAUSE AND TAKE A
BREAK.
AND A BREAK COULD BE, YOU KNOW, A TWO-MINUTE BREAK.
A BREAK COULD BE A TWO-HOUR BREAK.
MAYBE UNPLUG FROM WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
PUT THE SMARTPHONE AWAY, STOP WRAPPING PRESENTS, GET OUTSIDE.
GO EXERCISE.
RECHARGE YOUR BATTERIES.
SEPRATE YOURSELF.
THAT WOULD BE THE FIRST RECOMMENDATION.
THE SECOND THING IS, DO EVERYTHING IN MODERATION.
DON'T TRY TO OVERDO IT WHETHER IT'S EATING OR DRINKING OR
SHOPPING.
IF THOSE KINDS OF THINGS DON'T HELP, YOU ALSO WANT TO BE
MINDFUL OF YOUR SLEEP.
MAKE SURE YOU'RE GETTING REST, ALL THE THINGS WE KNOW ARE GOOD
FOR HEALTH.
IF YOUR TRY ALL THOSE THINGS AND THAT'S NOT HELPING, THEN MAYBE
THAT'S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO BRING TO THE ATTENTION OF YOUR
PRIMARY CARE PROVIDER.
>> I THINK, FOR MOMS IN PARTICULAR, THERE'S A LOT OF
PRESSURE TO GET EVERYTHING DONE AND MOMS MIGHT PUT PRESSURE ON
THEMSELVES.
WHAT ADVICE COULD YOU GIVE THEM ABOUT EXPECTATIONS?
SOMETIMES WE HAVE EXPECTATIONS THAT ARE UNREALISTIC FOR GETTING
THINGS DONE.
>> MOMS ALWAYS HAVE A DIFFICULT JOB.
MOMS MIGHT BE THE UNSUNG HEROES OF FAMILY LIFE ALL THE TIME,
RIGHT?
YOU'RE EXACTLY RIGHT.
OVER THE HOLIDAYS, THERE'S A LOT GOING ON.
THERE'S INCREASED EXPECTATIONS AND PRESSURES AND MOMS SHOULD
CUT THEMSELVES A LITTLE SLACK AND PROBABLY WE SHOULD CUT MOMS
A LITTLE BIT OF SLACK.
ALTHOUGH THE REALITY IS, MOMS WILL SAY, IF I DON'T DO IT, IT
WON'T GET DONE.
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO MAKE EXPECTATIONS MORE REASONABLE?
YOU DON'T WANT TO WORK YOURSELF TO THE BONE OR WORRY YOURSELF
FROM THE BONE, THAT WILL DETRACT FROM THE EXPERIENCE AND JOY FROM
THE HOLIDAYS >> THAT BRINGS UP A GOOD POINT
ABOUT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HAVE THIS JOY DURING THIS HOLIDAYS
AND HAPPY WITH YOUR FAMILY.
HOW CAN YOU HELP PEOPLE WHO HAVE LOST SOMEONE DURING THE
HOLIDAYS, GET THROUGH THIS TIME AS THEY'RE TRYING TO CELEBRATE
WITH OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS, BUT OF COURSE, THEY'RE MOURNING THE
LOSS OF THAT LOVED ONE?
>> SO, WHEN YOU SAY, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPY AMONG THE
HOLIDAYS.
THE REALITY IS, NOT NECESSARILY.
THERE IS NOT A SHOULD, OR SUPPOSED TO BE.
IF PEOPLE HAVE LOSSES, FAMILY STRESSORS, THIS IS NOT THE TIME
TO IGNORE THEM AND PRETEND THAT THEY'RE NOT THERE.
IT'S OKAY TO FEEL SAD AROUND THE HOLIDAYS.
IT'S OKAY TO MISS LOVED ONES AND RECOGNIZE THE PRESSURES THAT
YOU'RE UNDER.
AT THE SAME TIME, THE GOAL IS, IS TO SORT OF TRY TO PUT IT INTO
CON CONTEXT.
ATTEND TO THE THINGS THAT ARE MORE POSITIVE.
IF SOMEBODY IS HAVING THOSE KINDS OF FEELINGS, SAY, MISSING
A LOVED ONE OR DEALING WITH A DIVORCE IN THE FAMILY, REACHING
OUT FOR SUPPORT TO OTHER PEOPLE IN THE FAMILY OR FRIENDS OR
PROFESSIONAL HELP OR A CLERGY MEMBER.
PEOPLE SHOULDN'T SUFFER IN ISOLATION.
IT ONLY MAGNIFIES THE STRESSORS.
REACHING OUT AND MAKING A CONNECTION AND HAVING A LEVEL OF
SUPPORT AND VALIDATION.
>> DR.
STUART ANFANG, THANK YOU.
VERY GOOD ADVICE.
>> THANK YOU.