-A little-known fact.
I actually have a degree in psychology.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-And -- Yes, it's very impressive.
And right now, I am finally going to put that degree
to good use for the first time in a brand-new segment
"Photo Feels."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Okay, so, this is how it works.
I'm going to show you a series of photos.
And then you will tell me how that photo makes you feel.
-Happy. -I will --
-Good. I hope that's the case.
I will then analyze those thoughts
and give you my assessment. Are you down?
-Yeah. -Yes.
-Okay. Let me -- All smart people wear glasses,
so let me just quickly... Ahh.
Oh, psychologist, Doctor Lilly. Thank you so much.
-Real good. -Thank you.
This first image.
I want you to tell me how it makes you feel, okay?
-[ Gasps ] Curious.
-Yeah? Curious? What do you got?
-It makes me feel stared at?
-Mm-hmm. Interesting.
-It looks like a penis. -Yeah. Interesting.
-Yes. -Okay. This is actually --
Those are interesting observations,
but what it actually is --
[ Laughter ]
What it actually is... -Intimidated.
-...is live footage of your uterus betraying you.
Okay? This is live footage.
This is how this should make you feel.
But you said penis, which is interesting.
-Yes. It's not a feeling. Or maybe it is.
-Yeah. A penis can be a feeling.
-Yes. -A general feeling.
-Interesting. A lot to think about there.
-Sometimes, like, yeah, I feel penis.
-All right. How do I feel today?
-I feel penis today.
[ Laughter ] I just feel penis.
-I just woke up today,
and I was like, "Oh, I just feel penis."
-All right. The second one. [ Clearing throat ]
Okay. The second one. Ah.
How does this make you feel?
-Oh.
[ Laughter ]
-You better swallow that grass, duck.
[ Laughter ] -Is it a goose?
-Interesting. Interesting. What do you got, Kathryn?
-It makes me feel seen.
[ Laughter ]
And it makes me feel captured.
-Okay. Well, when you see this photo, it supposed to remind you
of that time you offered to pay for dinner
and then you saw the check.
[ Screaming ] -That's right.
-But you're both rich and famous,
so perhaps that doesn't relate to you.
All right. This next one. Are you ready?
-Uh-huh. -Yes.
-Eesh. -Oh, mother.
-Ohh. Okay.
-Um. -Hmm.
-This makes me feel exposed.
[ Laughter ]
-This makes me feel sorry for the one on the bottom.
-That's right.
-It makes me feel, um --
Yes, it just makes me feel trapped.
-Ketchup and mustard. -Yeah, ketchup and mustard.
-Ketchup and mustard.
And mustard blue razz.
-Blue razz. [ Snorts ]
[ Laughter ]
-Ketchup, mustard, blue razz. Nailed it.
-Interesting. -Blue razz.
-This photo is actually an artistic representation
of the elusive fifth base.
Yes. Very few people ever get there.
I've never been there, but I have seen it once.
In my uncle's room.
-Wait. Fifth base
like a sexual position or like a musical note?
-I'm going to go ahead and say sexual position.
Yeah. Did you see this in your Internet porn research?
-I did not.
Certainly not wearing those tights.
-Okay. I'll send you a link. -Okay.
-All right. Next one. Are you ready?
-Yep. -You're doing great so far.
I love getting a lot answers. -Not sure if we are.
I hope so. Penisy is still --
-[ Gasps ] -Ohh!
Oh, you're bad! I'm bad, I'm bad.
I'm bad. I'm bad. -Little bit of shame.
-Oh, interesting. That's very interesting you would say that.
Yeah. I see what's happened.
This photo is saying something completely different.
Yeah, no, see, when you see this,
you should be feeling outrage because this is a very good boy
and there's no way to prove what's happened is his fault.
-Ohh! Right!
-So assuming he's guilty says a lot about you, actually, okay?
-Ohh! My God.
I'm a recovering Catholic. That's probably why.
-Yeah. -Okay.
-And not to mention, if this is chocolate,
that's a whole other issue. -Right, right. Right.
-Well, that definitely has something to say about me.
Well, now I feel shame for real.
-Bet you feel less penisy about it, right?
All right.
-[ Gasps ] -Ohh.
-Ohh!
This makes me feel friendly!
[ Laughter ]
-Um, I feel -- I just feel awake.
-Yeah. -All of a sudden. Real woke.
-I just feel -- yeah. Invigorated.
-Yeah, me too. -Okay.
-It's interesting how this photo made you feel,
because what you should have felt
is extreme sadness, actually.
Because the banana is currently collecting unemployment
because it's been replaced by a darker, larger,
more desired emoji named the eggplant.
-Ohh! Okay.
-So, you know. It's a huge issue.
-Okay. -I'll give you that one to keep.
-Oh, thank you! Hello.
-Ohh. What a beautiful sheen.
-It really is.
-Last one. Here we go.
-Gonna give it to you.
-Ohh.
-How does this photo make you feel?
-Um... -Accused.
-Accused. [ Laughter ]
-It makes me feel, um, athletic!
-Oh, right. I forgot about the basketball team.
[ Laughter ]
It's still a team, right?
-You know, I think so, but here's the thing.
There's a lot to unpack in this photo
because this is clearly a very sexual image.
Do you know why?
-Horns. -No.
It's clearly a robot having sex with a crab.
[ Laughter ]
-Oh, my God!
-You didn't see it, which means you're very sexually suppressed.
-Oh, thank you.
-Yes. Do you see -- -This is fun.
-Do you see the robot having sex with the crab?
You'll never unsee it now. You're welcome. You're welcome.
-Wait. That's crazy. -That is crazy.
-That was "Photo Feels," everybody.