Hey there viewers! How well can you gauge people?
Have you met any two-faced individuals? If you are naive, fake-nice people can
take advantage of your goodness. The feeling of being used for someone's selfish interest can be
disappointing. But not if you are vigil enough to see right through their mask of pretense.
In today's video we will be discussing how to spot fake-nice people. Is ghosting a warning sign?
What about not listening to you? We are discussing all that and more....
1. They are self-centered It's ok to be your own cheerleader
on rough days, but tooting your own horn all the time is a sign that the person is fake. When you
lose the capacity to attend to others' needs, your personality becomes toxic. Fake people
often are narcissists. They lack empathy and feel unable to make a meaningful human connection.
Genuine people on the other hand will be more giving.
They will not have selfish interests, be willing to make new connections and will always try to
put others first. Their sentences will have less "I" and "me" and more of “us” and “we.”
While the fake people want to steal the spotlight, genuine people don't mind sharing the stage.
2. They will use flattery Compliments from a fake person
means they will often have ulterior motives. Fake people will always find a way to manipulate you.
They will try to get in the good books of people who might help them achieve their selfish goals.
This is the most insincere way of fulfilling rotten motives.
They will never compliment you truly on your abilities, even if they are your friends. Once
their work is done they might even act like they don’t know you and ignore you completely.
On the other hand you will find genuine people compliment from the bottom of their heart. It
can instantly make your day. They will stay away from buttering people up and instead offer
authentic praise and accolades. Even for those who might not bring wealth or other advantages.
They are all set to make the world a better place. They usually cherish friendships forever.
3. They respect only well connected people A person's true character is reflected when
you see how they treat juniors vs seniors. Fake people will only talk respectfully to
powerful and affluent people. They will treat others as unimportant.
They are very calculated and only see you as an opportunity for a better career.
We don't even want to imagine being a junior to fake people.They will walk all over you.
Genuine people on the other hand won’t categorize people. The goodness in their
heart is equally shared. They foster a feeling of mutual respect for everybody,
make their juniors feel safe and always stand by people without being judgemental.
4. They’re overly excited about you
When you meet fake people they will act phony and over excited to see you.
They may even make it sound like it was your mistake for not meeting them sooner. As if
they didn’t have your number! They might say that they missed you but it’ll be painfully obvious and
shallow. They clearly didn't miss you at all. Genuine people on the other hand make you feel
like home. They will always have the warmest welcomes waiting for you.
Even if you haven’t spoken for a long time. You’ll feel connected and enjoy your time together.
5. They are never around when you need them
Fake people have a million excuses when you ask them for the smallest favor.
They might even stop responding to your messages and calls. They will be completely unavailable
for emotional support or physical help. It’s a give an inch take a mile situation.
Genuine people, on the other hand, take time out of their busy schedules for you.
They will be all ears when you have lots to discuss. They don't mind being there for you
or helping you move apartments. They will make sure you are not alone in a crisis.
6. They have the look of contempt
Fake people often consider themselves superior to others. In their heads they’re already the
“Queen Bee”. They are also known for the angry stare or looking down on you.
Don't forget about the nonchalant eye rolling that comes free with their intolerable personality.
Studies have shown that a contemptuous people have failed marriages, shame coworkers and
even tend towards terrorism. They can have antisocial tendencies, disagreeableness,
machiavellianism or racism. They have inflated self views and a cold disregard for others.
Genuine people will have a warm smile and maintain good eye contact.
You can read their emotions through their eyes. Their body language will be much more
pleasant, with no signs of hostile behavior.
7. They will mine for your approval
Genuine people don't need to be liked by everyone. But fake people cook up all kinds of stories in
an attempt to be likable. If they sense you’re not buying their stories they will keep trying
until you finally give in. Most of their fables end up portraying how great or giving they are.
Genuine people will always have numbers, facts and figures ready in any debate.
They do not need anyone's approval as they will have it in black and white with no gray areas.
You will naturally feel more confident interacting with them.
Also, you will never get the “ultimate savior of mankind” vibes.
8. They will try to break your self confidence Fake people are always ready with a list of
taunts and insults. They might make fun of your weight, height, new haircut, clothes or even the
food you eat. Literally any topic under the sun. But they will not take a dig at you directly.
They will make you believe that they are on your side and then break your self-esteem.
This is a form of interpersonal rejection that can leave a deep impact on you. Studies have
shown that romantic rejections, dissolution of a friendship, estrangement from family members,
or merely being ignored at casual encounters has a myriad of consequences.
The person targeted can feel hurt, jealousy, lonely, guilty, socially anxious, and embarrassed.
They might just pretend to be listening to you while you try to reason with them. They
want you to do well, but not better than them. That is why they don't have the best intentions.
Genuine people will be motivating. They literally build people up and give a
sense of confidence. If something goes wrong they will never leave your side.
9. They never stick to their word Fake people are the best at giving false hope.
Sometimes even running away from commitment and responsibilities.
They are of the mind that promises can be broken easily. They will promise to
be at your birthday party but make lame excuses and bail out.
Once you see this behavior repeatedly, you’ll know that their words mean nothing.
Studies have shown that people who break promises may be tempted by monetary benefits.
Such people fail to foster social cooperation and trust. Promise breakers are selfish and dishonest.
Genuine people stand by their word. They will find it morally conflicting and unfair
to break promises. Even if they are wrong they will accept their mistake gracefully.
10. They thrive on gossip
You must have heard the saying that great minds discuss ideas, empty minds discuss people. Fake
people love to gossip. It does not matter if you are their best friend or just an acquaintance.
They will see to it that your reputation is tarnished by spreading false rumors.
Studies have shown that gossip and rumors spread at the workplace
can increase the emotional exhaustion, performance pressure and reduce the
organizational-based self-esteem or identity of the targeted person.
But fakers really wouldn’t care even if the most horrible things happened to you.
Sometimes they might be the one starting gossip in the first place. They could be extremely sweet to
your face but say nasty things about you when you turn your back. They enjoy the misery of others.
When genuine people are your friends they won’t indulge in small talk and gossip.
They may even ask other people to stop spreading false news.
11. They love to brag You call it “bragging?” fake
people simply call it “self exuberance!”. They want everybody to know all about their donations
to charity or how expensive their watch is. They want all the credit without doing the work.
Studies have shown that grooming one's appearance just to grasp other peoples attention or bragging
about your own talent and abilities is related to narcissism. They enjoy publicizing their
accomplishments and exaggerating their positive attributes. They just want to be admired.
Genuine people are always humble. They try to never
project insecurities by mentioning or boasting about their accomplishments.
12. They are poor listeners Do you always have to say “Are you
there with me?” Or “Are you listening?” while talking to your friend on the phone?
Are you getting too many “Whatevers!” from them? This is clearly a red flag to stay away.
A great conversation is the one where both parties get to speak equally.
That is the foundation of a well balanced conversation. But if
they continuously interrupt you, they are definitely fake people.
They are too focused on their own stuff that sometimes they even tune out when you talk.
They love the settings where they can own the mic in front of an audience. They wish to be
the only speaker in the room.They may even get a sense of superiority by not allowing you to make
your point and draw their own conclusions. That's an indirect way of belittling you.
Genuine people give an equal opportunity for everybody to speak their heart out.
They are patient listeners and focus on truly understanding your point of view.
They are never in a hurry to prove themselves correct.
Cutting ties with toxic family members might make you feel guilty.
Although you might feel terrible initially, it is for your own mental peace.
Let's keep the conversation going by a couple of more
videos related to toxic family members, shall we?
Watch 12 techniques to set boundaries with toxic family members
or When To Cut Toxic Family Members From Your Life
Go ahead, click one. Or better yet, watch both, and learn more about how to bring balance in your
life. Have you made any more observations of fake people? Let’s know in the comments below!