Welcome everyone, this is Skillopedia, the place to learn skills for the real world and
my name is Michelle. We often find ourselves in some conversations that we really want
to escape. May be because we are not enjoying it or sometimes we want to do other things
but the question is how to escape such conversations? And how to do it gracefully in a manner that
no one feels hurt? Okay, so this session is all about that. Today, I'm going to tell you
some interesting ways to escape conversations that you don't want to participate in. so
keep watching, my name is Michelle and let's start.
The first trick to exit a conversation gracefully is by introducing your conversation partner
to someone else. So this means that when you're talking to someone and you wanna get out of
it, you could introduce them to another of your friend, whom you think would be interested
in talking to them. Or maybe when you’re speaking to that person and there's another
friend passing by, you could just ask them to roll in and have a conversation. Once these
two start talking and they start hitting it well, which means once both of them start
enjoying the conversation, you could just say, hey it was really nice talking, I'll
just get back to you. Like that, you can exit the conversation and do, what you want to
do. If you are not able to introduce another friend to this person, then what you can do
is, you can ask them to introduce you to other people. Obviously, especially if you are at
a networking event, you could share your future goals with them. Like if you're planning a
start up and you could tell them that you're planning a start up and you need to meet other
people who could support you with this goal. So you can tell them that, can you introduce
me to someone else who can help me with my future goal? And if you're at a very general
party, then you could simply ask them, would you introduce me to other people here? I don't
know anyone. So like this, you can gracefully exit the conversation and meet other people
at the party.
Another graceful way to exit the conversation is, by asking them for a drink or food. You
can offer them to get a drink. You could say that, hey, can I get something to drink for
you? Or can I get something to eat for you? And most probably their answer would be, no,
it's okay and then you can get out of there and you know how to exit after that. That’s
the right way to escape but to your bad luck, if they say, yeah, why not? You can go get
a drink and get a friend along and when you have another friend, you could get both of
them talking or you could keep talking to your friend while not making them feel as
if you're ignoring them. You can have a few words with that person also while you talk
to your friend and enjoy your drink. This way at least you can relieve yourself of a
regular conversation with that person.
Another tricky way to skip the conversation is by using your phone. Of course, we've all
got phones and we can often use them to get out of a conversation. You could always say
that, hey I need to step out to make a call to my mum or you could say, hey, my friend
has been waiting for my call, can I just call her and get back? And you can obviously exit
the situation and if you wanna get even more tricky or sneaky, then what you can do is,
you can use some of the apps which allow you to get fake calls on demand. All you need
to do is, just press the button for fake call and you will immediately have a fake call
and once you have it, you've also got the reason to escape the conversation. So use
your phone to escape any conversation that you want to.
Now I have for you quite a tested excuse and I think you may have already guessed it. you
could always say, hey I’m sorry but I need to use the toilet and then you have no turning
back and you're never coming back to continue the conversation. In other cases, you could
also leave it a bit vague by saying, please excuse me, they may not even question you
back, like what happened? You need to go somewhere? May be because they don't even know you that
well. So you could simply say, please excuse me and not come back at all. So you could
use this vague excuse or you could say, hey, I need to use the toilet.
You could use a very natural transition. What I mean here is that, you could just look around
in the room while speaking to them and as soon as you see the clock, you could just
act like you remembered something and you could say, hey, it's 8 o'clock I just remembered
I need to get going, my daughter is waiting at home. So like this, you sound very natural
because you're just looking around the room and you just remembered something. This is
called spontaneous interruption or natural realization. So you could use this tip to
exit the conversation.
It’s a great idea to put things from their perspective. What you can do is, you could
tell them, hey, I don't want to take all your time or maybe you could say that, hey I think
other people also want to talk to you. By doing this, you’re making them feel that
they are really important people and other people also want to talk to them. By giving
them such importance and prominence, they won't feel bad when you say this and they
will actually not feel that you're rude but you would also be able to escape the conversation
quite gracefully while leaving them feeling great.
You should look for some lulls in the conversation. What do I mean by lulls? Lulls are those pauses
in the conversation that you often feel. Whenever you finish telling a story or the person that
you are talking to, finishes telling about an experience, there's a sudden pause in the
conversation. If you're smart, you’ll use that pause because what happens at those pauses
is, either you can start of a new topic or you could introduce them to someone else or
in other cases, you could simply end the conversation without sounding rude. Because that looks
like an appropriate moment to stop but how to do it? You could say, hey, it was great
catching up but now I need to go and call Sarah, my friend who has been waiting. So
this way, you can exit the conversation. So take note of those momentary pauses and don't
miss that opportunity when you can exit.
If you want a smooth ending, you could bring the full circle of the conversation. What
I mean by a full circle is, you should start again by the reason using which you started
the conversation. So let's say that you asked your partner for advice. So you could say
the reason, why you asked for advice and then you could thank them and in the end, tell
them what you've learnt from them. For example, if you ask them for, an advice for a recipe,
you could say, hey thanks for the heads up. Thank you for your advice about the recipe.
I’ll check that book, thank you so much and I'll see you later. This is a quick way
to exit and they'll definitely not feel bad because they'll feel that you’ve learnt
something from them and then you have valued their words. So this way, you could exit the
conversation with a very smooth ending.
Okay, now we have another very gentle way to end the conversation and that is by offering
them to stay in touch. This means that you are making future plans to interact with them.
May be, sometimes we don't have enough time to talk to a person but we actually enjoyed
the conversation. So we want to get back to them. If this is your case, then you could
obviously share your number with this person. It’s up to you, whether you want to take
their call in the future or not. So you could share your number or may be, make a plan to
go out somewhere. Like you had a conversation about a restaurant. So you could tell them,
hey let's catch up in this restaurant next week. So like this, you're offering a future
plan and asking them to stay in touch. You could also tell them that, I will read the
book that you've suggested and I'll share the reviews with you. So a future plan is
a very nice way to keep in touch and get to talk more to that person.
It’s a good way to ask for someone's phone number but if you’re at a business meeting,
it doesn’t look good if you ask for a phone number immediately after you meet a person
for the first time. So instead of the contact number, you could ask for a business card
and once they give it to you, please don't stuff it in your purse because that's a sign
of disrespect. read it carefully, take a minute, just mumble softly what you read on the card
and that shows that you care and you respect the fact that they shared their business card
with you and this way, you can also sweetly and kindly exit the conversation by saying,
thank you.
Try this, I love talking to you but I’ve got a few other people to catch up with. I
hope I can see again at the end of the event. What does it sound like? It sounds like you
really enjoyed the company and that's why you said, I loved talking to you. So you can
definitely, show if you enjoyed someone's company and you could also say that you wanna
meet them again but it's a better idea to add their name to it. You could say, hey I
love talking to you, Rebecca, I hope I can see you again. Not only that, you could also
thank them for their time. So you could say, I love talking to you, Rebecca, thank you
for your time, I hope I can see you again at the end of the event. I've got a few other
people to catch. So this way, you can make them feel valuable and very special.
You can never exit gracefully if you don't do
what you've said. What I mean here is, if you're telling them that you need to get a
drink, then go and get a drink. Or if you’re telling them that you need to make a call,
then go and make a call. Well, like I told you, some of these reasons may not be real.
in that case, what you can do is, you can act as if you're trying to make a call or
you can act as if you're trying to get a drink because if they're looking at you and they
find out that your reason was fake, all the impression that you’ve made is lost. So
make sure that what you’ve said, you do that, to exit gracefully and to create a lasting
impression on that person's mind and I hope that none of you will actually feel bad.
So here we are, at the end of this session where today we have looked at some very interesting
and tricky ways to exit a conversation. Though all these ways are very graceful ways, for
example, if you're going to grab a drink, you could get one for your conversation partner
or you could ask a friend to rescue you. If this also doesn’t work, then fake calls
can surely work or you could say that you need to call somebody. So revise and go through
all these tips next time when you’re going for a business meeting or for a party and
make sure that you use all of them.
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Thank you so much for watching this session with me. I’ll come back for more sessions
with you all. My name is Michelle and thanks for watching Skillopedia and also if you want
me to do any video on a particular topic, please leave it in the comments and I'll pick
those up for you all. Thank you, bye.