hey what's up you guys it's Travis.
Before I begin this video I have a question for you guys.
If the person that you with cheats on you but they come and
confessed and apologized. Do you: A. Forgive them or B. Leave them
based on previous experience I've learned that once a cheater always a cheater but I want to hear
what you guys have got to say about this. So leave a comment in the comment section below
and I'll look forward to seeing those when this video's posted.
One thing inspired me to make this video is I get
a lot of messages from you guys asking me for dating advice and this is
probably because I wrote the book "Ten Steps to Stop being a Crazy Girl",which is still not published but
for those who don't know it's a memoir about some of my dating experiences where I was
by all means a crazy girl.
So basically the story that I'm going to be telling you guys
today is a chapter from that book that kind of covers the ground of excuses.
the whole concept
behind the idea of no excuses is basically summed up in one sentence
if someone wants to call you be with you text you or do anything with you they will
find a way to make it happen period.
Instead of getting all preachy with you guys
I decided I was going to share a story of what happened to me when I started making excuse for the guy that I was
dating, which is why today I'm going to be telling you guys the story
about the time I caught my boyfriend cheating on me
This story takes place when I was 20 years old I was living in
Denver at my friend Amy she introduced me to her friend Nick, who was this really
nice guy that pursued me hard.
He would not take no for an answer. I eventually
caved and so finally I decided to give him a chance and we became boyfriends.
He was a promoter in Denver so he was this super social guy. He was always the life of the
party and one of the things that attracted me to him the most was that he made me feel like
I was the most important person in the room at all times.
He was proud to call me his boyfriend and that felt really good.
Anyway, a couple of months into the relationship
Nick get this phone call from the producers of this reality show and the
producers were like "hey we're moving our next season of the show to Denver."
They wanted him to show the cast around the nightlife of Denver.
Nick, of course, was really excited about this.
I, on the other hand, was a little bit apprehensive.
Reality shows aren't known for bringing out the best sides in people in case you haven't watched
any reality show in history of ever.
But being the supportive boyfriend that I was I was
happy for Nick so I gave him all of my support.
A couple of weeks later the night came when Nick was
supposed to go meet the cast and take them out on the town.
So, I took a shower. I cleaned my cookies. I put on my nicest
outfit and I was ready to hit the town, but then when Nick came out of the bathroom
he was like, "Listen babe, I'm sorry I don't think you should come this time."
" I just don't think it'll be very professional if I bring you along with me."
Let's forget the fact that a club promoter is probably the least professional job in the history of jobs
But again I was still trying to be the understanding boyfriends, so I was like
"Ok I guess I'll stay home I mean I ironed my shirt and shit, but ok if you want to go you go do your thing."
The next morning I asked Nick how the night went.
He just kind of replies with, "It was fine."
The things you need to know about Nick is
that this is one of those people that makes everything the most exciting thing ever
He could take a shit and write a trilogy about it so I knew damn well then his night was more than just fine.
Finally he was like, " I wanna tell you how the night went, but I can't because I signed
a confidentiality agreement. I can't really talk about anything that happens on the show so I'm sorry."
That seemed like a perfectly legitimate excuse so I let it go and I just kept doing my thing.
Well the producers of this reality show liked Nick so much that they decided to
ask him to come back to host the cast for the rest of the season and that
would have been all well and fine if Nick didn't start becoming more distant from me as the season progressed.
Suddenly all that attention he was giving to me at the beginning
to make me fall for him was slowly fading away. Sometimes he would just stop
texting me mid conversation or he'd forget to call me when he said he would but no
matter what happened Nick always seemed to have an excuse.
On top of that every time I'd bring it up to him, he'd find a way to turn the conversation
around to make it look like I was crazy.
fast forward to a few months later.
the reality show had finally wrapped and the season was about to air. So every week my
friend and I would meet up at one of their houses and watch the show where I finally got to meet all
these strangers that were occupied so much of my boyfriend's time.
As with many reality shows there was your typical cast of characters one of which included
a gay castmate.
Nick didn't say anything about a gay character being on the show.
That little thing stood out in my mind but I just slipped it aside along with the rest of my common
sense and intuition. So yeah every week my friends and I would get together to
watch the show and we'd watch the entire season where we didn't see Nick on it
one time until the season finale.
I still remember the night like it was yesterday.
I was sitting there with this big bowl of popcorn wedged between my legs
I had sauce in my bag
swag
My long blonde hair blowing in the wind
Just air going through it.
We were ready for that season finale.
So there my friends and I were watching the episode
like any other episode and as I was about to shuffle the next piece of popcorn into my
mouth I stopped because there he was.
The cast was out at some bar in Denver and Nick was there with them.
Every single one of my friends faces just turned at me and I could feel their eyes piercing into the
core of my soul
Still didn't know why that girl wore a hospital gown to the viewing party to be honest.
For a second while we're watching everything's fine, but then it happens
Nick and the gay castmate start making out in the middle of the bar and
suddenly that piece of popcorn that I was holding up oh so close to my mouth just slips out of my hands
and falls slowly to the floor.
Time slows down as my friends' eyes follow the popcorn as it slowly fell to the floor
like thunder that popcorn crashed several times before it finally
rolled to a stop
Boom, boom, boom
Finally, that piece of popcorn fell to a stop and for a moment all was quiet.
All my friends jumped out of their chairs and ran for
that TV like a herd of elephants. Their footsteps hitting the ground as they shook the earth running to turn off the
TV, but before they could get there I was like
"Don't touch it!"
I wanted to watch what happened next.
I had to! For so many months, I had driven myself crazy thinking that I was
paranoid and finally the truth was sitting there right in front of my face
at that point another friend of mine, Cassie, decides to play the hero and step in front of the TV
where she's like, "It was just a kiss Trav! It was just a kiss!"
As much as I appreciated Cassie's efforts it wasn't a second later before we heard Nick's voice
over hers say, "Do you have a condom?"
Sweet little Cassie she didn't even turn back she just sat
there and closed her eyes as tight as she could as if she was trying teleport to
any other place in the world other than where she was right then.
The rest of us, on the other hand, just kinda leaned past Cassie to look back at the TV where I then got to see my
boyfriend Nick having sex with the cast mate at the cast mates house.
Yeah it was a bad night.
Obviously we broke up that night and I haven't really spoken to him since then. It's easy for me to laugh at this now
because it's been so many years, but at the time I was really devastated by this
I don't condone revenge and I don't condone violence and since this all happened I've forgiven Nick, but I did
happen to find Nick's current address on google maps where it's just gonna be right over here.
Oh oh look. This is the street view of his house and wow that's kind of crazy. That's a nice front door and that
window looks like a pretty good point of entry in case if someone were to break in there, but
we're not gonna do that because we are the bigger person but the address will be posted in the
description section below so...just go say hi to Nick and tell him I miss him.
If there's one thing that I want you to take away
from this is the no excuses rule. This is a perfect example of letting someone take
advantage of you by giving excuses as to why there not treating you the same way they used to.
Obviously it's not always going to be cheating, but if someone's not giving you the
same attention that they used to it's important for you to realize that something else has that attention
and you're no longer their number one priority.
That's it for my story time you guys.
if you guys want to see more from my book leave a comment bellow and say
I AM NOT A CRAZY GIRL
cause you're not girl. We believe you alright. You're my titty. There's that address again in case you missed it.
Go find him.
and that's all I have for right now
So thank you guys so much for watching
and we'll see you next time.
the reality show started filming in Denver. Finally the night came when beep!
Fu*k I said his name!
Wanna try the remnants of my toothpaste?
I don't know about that one.
Oh it's still there?
I already tried it.
We're disgusting