Hey everybody, happy thursday!
Now today's question comes from Twitter.
You know Twitter!
Hopefully you're following me on there
but I asked you for all of your
eating disorder based questions
and one of the questions that I selected was
''Hey Kati, what's the reason that our
eating disorder speak to our competitive nature?''
Very good question and in parenthesis she asks
(you know, when we see someone
skinnier and want to compete.)
I thought this was a really good question because
eating disorders are competitive and why does that happen?
Now, eating disorders can be
competitive for a lot of different
reasons because it really depends on why
you have your eating disorder,
what purpose it serves for you,
and why it started in the first place
because as we know eating disorders are
coping skills for something larger meaning we're using
overeating, undereating, over-exercising
any of our eating disorder behaviors
binging, purging, you name it...
as a way to numb out, express, or something all of the
other things that we're feeling or other
things that have been going on and so
that is honestly why it gets competitive
because for many my clients their
eating disorders are the only thing that
they feel that they owned themselves
like it's all theirs, no one could take
it from them it's what makes them unique
a lot of people feel that way and so
because our eating disorders tells us those lies,
that this the only thing that you're good at
this is the only thing that only yours
this is the only need to control this is what makes
you special and unique whatever it is
when we encounter someone else with an
eating disorder we automatically think
''Well I do it better than you''
''This is MY thing''
''What are you doing in my world?''
''This is the thing that I do, don't you know that?''
and immediately we're like combative,
obviously we're not actually
saying any of this it's all going on up here
but we automatic compare our body
we automatically compare what we're eating
and truthfully that's honestly why I think
treatment centers when you eat in
groups is really helpful and healing
because we have to get out of that
we're forced to eat the same
we're forced to sitdown and do activities with each other
and we're almost forced out of that
competitive nature 'cause it's constantly
challenging it therapeutically
I've also heard from a lot of my clients and
viewers that another reason it's kind of
competitive is because we use our
eating disorder as a way to scream for help
meaning, we're feeling terrible
bad things are happening,
we don't like where we're at
and we're using the eating disorder as a way to
to express all that is we're feeling
therefore, our eating disorder is our way to
''prove'' that we're having a hard time and
''prove'' that we struggle if we encounter
someone else who has an eating disorder
we're like, wait I'm sicker than you
I deserveto get help, I'm the one who screaming to be heard
and so that's another reason
why our eating disorder can really be competitive.
And lastly, I just want to acknowledge
how nasty eating disorders are
and how no matter how sick we actually get
our eating disorder will always say that
we're not sick enough, we're not thin enough
we're not doing it enough
we're not ill enough we're struggling enough
or feel shitty enough there's never
enough that we can do to make our
eating disorder happy
I did a video with Nikki Phillippi last week
and if you recall, she mentioned how when she was
struggling with her eating disorder
she knew that it would never be enough like
the ideal body that she was hoping to
achieve would never be there because it
wasn't a real tangible thing that she
could accomplish the eating disorder
keeps moving the finish line and
therefore if we come into contact with
someone else who's struggling with an
eating disorder or we suspect are struggling with an eating disorder
our eating disorder is going to be like
we'll look at them they're
worse off, look at that, look how sick they are
you, you're not even that sick
and it starts this negative cycle up again
therefore, then we end up thinking
Well I need to be worse and we're competing
with them even though like I said before
whenever never actually having these conversations,
it's just going on in our head
and it's essentially our healthy voice
with our eating disorder voice, kind of going at it.
but know that this is a very
normal part of having an eating disorder
and a normal part of recovery
and if you are out there,
and you are struggling with
and eating disorder, you find yourself competing with
other people, checking in with other
people noticing their body, how much
they're eating all the time
please reach out for help
there are tons professionals that are available tons of
treatment centers available to you so
you can get the help that you need and
deserve and I didn't have a free eating
disorder workbook I'll link it in the
description is on my website you can
download it for free you can get started
because know that recovery is possible
and you can and will get better
Keep working with me! Keep checking back as we
work towards a healthy mind and
a healthy body
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see you next time, bye!