There are a lot of
weak scary men out there
at least that's
how a lot of women feel.
That's what a lot of women are saying.
They're telling me these men are intimidated,
they cannot handle a strong woman,
they're all just running for the hills,
and don't know what they want.
But why?
Why are men intimidated by you?
Well, I'm going to explain to you why
but I'm also going to explain to you that
it may be more than just
the issue of intimidation.
So, my name is Stephan Labossiere
aka Stephan Speaks.
Your life and relationship coach
here to provide you with
dating, life, and relationship advice.
Today it's going to be
relationship and dating advice
for women, all right.
And as I said in the beginning,
I'm going to explain to you
why men are intimidated by you.
So, before we begin
as always be sure to like this video,
share this video,
subscribe to this channel,
and give me your feedback.
Have you come across the man
that was intimidated by you?
Tell me yes or no,
tell me your stories,
leave your comments,
tell me why you think men are intimidated,
let's talk.
But let's break this whole thing down.
And I want to say right now from the jump,
you need to watch this to the very end
because I have an important message
that I have to explain to you
in regards this whole
intimidation dynamic, all right.
So, now yes,
are there some men
who are intimidated by women?
This does exist, you know.
There are a lot of men who are not
walking in their masculine energy,
who have not found themselves,
found their purpose and
when that's the case, it can be very
easy to become intimidated.
But again, I want to give you some very
specific things to understand
why this intimidation is happening.
But we're going to be looking at this
from two different angles.
Because again, there's so much more
to this intimidation
than just simply, men are weak
or men don't know what they want
or men don't know how to
handle a strong woman, all right.
So, let's get to number one.
The first reason why
a man may be intimidated by you
is because he knows
you have better options,
plain and simple.
Some men who are not
confident in who they are,
who are not confident with what they
bring to the table,
are going to feel intimidated
or anxious dealing with a woman
who they know can do better than them.
Who they feel like
all these men want,
all these men are in their DMs
or whatever the case may be.
And that bothers him.
He does not know how
to feel secure amongst
this kind of attention that you get,
which is why yes,
there are some men out there
who prefer to find a woman
who doesn't get too much attention.
They feel safer there it's easier.
Now, listen, this isn't something
you can do anything about.
The fact that you have
better options than him, all right.
And that's better options
in the way that he perceives it.
Because sometimes and this
happens to both men and women.
They don't understand the value
that you see in them.
Now, in some cases
you flat out have better options
and you flat out are dating down.
And you're dealing with someone
you probably shouldn't be dealing with.
So, naturally if you do date down
you can almost expect
that some level of intimidation
is going to creep in
or insecurity is going to creep in
because the reality is that yes,
you could be doing a lot better.
But other times it is a matter of
insecurity within them that
you can't really fix because
they have to be able to see themselves
in the light that you see them.
It's almost like when
you see potential in a man
but he doesn't see that
own potential in himself.
There's going to be a disconnect, all right.
Not that you shouldn't be dating potential,
but we'll talk about that in a whole another video.
But the point is that yes,
him knowing you can do better,
him knowing you have better options
can intimidate him
and can cause that man
to self sabotage, run away,
become very toxic,
even become very controlling and demeaning.
Because now he's trying to
bring you down to a level
where he feels like
he can now control you because
he's basically devalued you
and now lifted him up
in the process, all right.
Which is why some men will become
very verbally abusive,
talk down to you,
tell you, you ain't nothing, all this stuff
because he's trying
to make himself feel better.
But bottom line is yes,
you having better options
is a reason why
some men are intimidated by you.
The second thing
that we can talk about as far as
men being intimidated by you is that
you're much more accomplished than him.
So, again, there are
a lot of women who are finding success
in the workplace, all right.
There are a lot more women
starting their own businesses,
there are a lot more women getting educated.
And because of this there are going to be
a lot of scenarios where
the woman is more accomplished than the man.
And so once again, it kind of all
feeds into number one about
him feeling like you have better options
or that you actually
do have better options.
When you're more accomplished
that can be a hit to his ego.
Because he has not accomplished
enough in his life
or he has accomplished nothing
in his life, all right.
And so again,
when the issue is your accomplishments
and if you notice I'm naming things first
that you really have no control over.
Like, I'm not going to tell you
to not be accomplished
to make him feel better, all right.
There's something else that you could do
we'll talk about that at the end.
But you just simply having graduated,
having your own business,
having achieved so many different things
if that's what you've done,
that's what you've done, all right.
And a man has to be willing to
see past that in regards to
not allowing that to affect him,
his mindset, and his understanding
of his place in your life, all right.
There is some
self-work that needs to be done
in order for him to handle that.
Now, let me just also make it clear.
There are tons of men
who don't get intimidated because you have
plenty of options.
There are tons of men who
don't get intimidated by
you being more accomplished.
I just want to repeat that
in case some of you all think
none of these men can handle this.
But no, there are plenty out there
but yes, there are
a segment of men that exists
that these things will apply to.
And again, this isn't something
that you can do,
I want you to be mindful of it
to understand the whole dynamic
but your accomplish, your accomplish,
it is what it is, you know.
You don't have to dumb down
your accomplishments so to speak.
But again, keep watching
because I am going to tell you
what you can and should do, all right.
A third reason why
a man may be intimidated by you
is you make more money.
Now listen,
the discussion of money is a very...
It's a source of power for a lot of guys.
Because the reality is
that society promotes
and society says that
to a lot of men you're not worth much
if you're not successful or
if you're not financially stable, you know.
And I'll be the one to admit
that I talk to men
or I tell men you need to
find financial stability.
Not that I want to say
they're not worthy so to speak.
In some ways yes,
in some ways not worthy in the sense of
everyone's worthy of love,
everyone should be treated
fairly, all these things.
But when we're talking about
being in a committed relationship,
a committed romantic relationship,
there is a level of
qualifications that we have to meet.
There is a standard we have to meet.
And so, yes, you may not
be at that standard or level yet
so you need... You've got work to do
and I don't even see anything wrong with that.
But getting back to the main point
yes, having more money can be
a source of power for a lot of men
but also let me say this.
A lot of times
it's not simply the fact that
you have the more money,
it's the PTSD they have
from the last woman they dealt with
who made more money than them.
Now again, I'll break it down deeper
when I get into that main point
later on in the video.
But essentially, a lot of women
just to kind of give a sneak preview.
A lot of women who make that...
They know they make more money
than that man
don't realize how they talk down to that man.
Don't realize how they
emasculate that man.
Don't realize how they use that
to try to control and
run things with that man
and that becomes the problem,
not the money itself.
Because there are tons of men out there
who would love to join forces
with a woman who either
makes good money or even
makes more money than them.
There is a lot of men out there
who would have no problem
leeching off of you.
So, trust and believe
the money itself
is usually not the issue, all right.
But there are men that yes,
the money itself will
cause them to start acting funny,
they'll start projecting
on to you these issues.
They'll start being very
guarded or on edge
because they think you're
looking at them a certain kind of way
because they don't make as much as you.
That they can't live the lifestyle that you live,
or they cannot provide you
with the lifestyle you currently live
and so now they feel less than.
So, that does happen,
that is an issue but again,
if you're making a lot of money,
I'm not going to tell you to give your money away
just so you can make a man
feel comfortable, all right.
That's not the key
but I will tell you what the key is soon.
So, now, let's get to the next one.
Now, the last thing before we get into
kind of the flip side of
why this "intimidation" is happening is
you don't tolerate nonsense, all right.
The bottom line is you come across
as a no nonsense,
I ain't taking nobody's crap
type of woman
and that vibe,
that energy can be intimidating.
It can be like, all right,
I don't have any room for error here,
I've got to come correct.
It is like going to a job interview
and you're feeling like, man if I don't nail this,
I'm not getting this job
and that can get intimidating
because you're like,
it makes you more on edge,
more worried about all the small details
rather than just relaxing
and being yourself.
And so, that can happen with a lot of men
because they feel like okay,
I really want to make this work
but she looks like she has
a short leash, you know.
Or she doesn't tolerate much
and so, you know,
some men may not even try
to take that interview so to speak.
They may not even try
to walk into your space
because you know what?
That seems like
I can't handle those standards,
those expectations and so on and so forth.
So, yes, you exuding a woman
who doesn't take anyone's crap again,
is going to be intimidating
to a lot of men.
But let's flip this
let's get the other side.
Now, listen, if you've been agreeing
this whole time, all right.
Don't start getting mad and salty now
that I'm going to explain to you
the other side of this.
I want you to be just as open minded,
I want you consider what I'm telling you
because I'm trying to help you, all right.
Let me make this very clear,
I'm not trying to blame you
because I notice whenever I point out things
about the woman and what
she could be doing differently,
some of you all take it as
I'm blaming the women.
No, I'm trying to help correct an issue.
I'm trying to help you see better success
in a certain area.
And I'm explaining to you
why this happens
and I'm trying to give you perspective,
a well-rounded perspective,
so that you understand this
from as much angles as possible
so that again, you can achieve success.
So, now, let's get to it.
The first thing I'm going to mention,
you look mean.
Bottom line, you look difficult,
you’re walking around,
you’re mean mugging people.
If you don't know what mean mugging means,
it means you got like
a frown on your face,
you look hard or
some people call it resting B face
I don't want to say the word but it's
the b-i-t you know what face.
And yes, that
negative energy you're exuding
it's not even about intimidation.
And that's the thing that we're
going to be really highlighting here.
It's not about intimidation,
which is what I'm about to lay out for you,
it's about you come off too negative.
And many of you hide behind
oh, they're intimidated because I'm successful,
they're intimidated because I have money,
they're intimidated because of all these things.
No, check your attitude,
check your energy,
check the fact that how mean you're looking.
Now, I'm not saying
you've got to walk around 24/7
with a big O smile in your face
looking like you're in the circus, all right.
That's not what I'm trying to imply,
but at the very least,
you've got to get to a place
where you’re relaxed,
where you are at peace from within,
which is good for you first and foremost.
And let that energy
shine through you,
let that positivity come out of you.
That whole looking mean
it can be fixed, that is correctable.
Many of us don't realize
how we're coming across.
I've had people come to me
or actually DM me
who said I saw you in the gym,
but I didn't want to approach you
because you look mean as hell.
And so, I can't say,
oh, well, no you’re just intimidated
by a confident man.
No, I got to check myself, you know what?
Maybe I am looking a little
unapproachable in person
I need to be more mindful of that.
So, be mindful.
Are you looking mean?
Because that can be
the real problem that you're facing.
So, now, the next thing
I'm going to mention
and I kind of this already said it
but I'll reiterate it or
repeat it and just
emphasize it some more
is you give off
too much masculine energy
you have a bad attitude, bottom line.
So, whether it's
the way that you look mean,
whether it's when you speak to people
your energy is attacking them, your spirit,
whether you want to look at it as energy, spirit,
same thing to me.
Bottom line is
that's coming off of your body
in a way that is a deterrent.
It is a hindrance to people
being able to vibe with you,
people being able to
want to get to know you.
It pushes men away.
And so, again, a lot of times
and this is especially true
for the successful woman,
the woman who has money,
things of that nature.
Many times you are operating
in the work force where
there's a lot of masculine energy being carried.
There's a lot of masculine energy
being engaged in, all right.
And now when you come home
or when you enter into
engagement with men randomly,
you're not turning that switch off.
And that hard masculine energy
becomes a problem.
And so,
as I mentioned with the other point,
a lot of women hide behind
I'm successful, I'm strong, I'm this,
but you don't realize you're
intolerable to some people.
And I'm I'm not trying to be disrespectful,
I promise you, but
for those of you who are fighting this
consider some of you
know women who are
essentially going through the same thing,
saying men are intimidated but
you don't even like being around that woman.
Some of your own mothers
fit the description
and you don't want to be bothered with her.
Does it mean you’re intimated by your friends?
Or does it mean you’re intimated by your mother?
No, it means that
that hurt, that negative energy,
those things that they're not
always mindful of.
Because if you ask them they'll probably say,
I'm not negative, I'm not too hard,
there's nothing wrong with me,
but there is.
There absolutely is.
And so, again, we got to be careful of
hiding behind the positive labels
of strong woman, successful woman,
all these things,
and ignoring the bad energy.
Now, if you are giving off
positive energy,
if you're walking in your feminine energy.
And I do believe in women
tapping into their feminine energy, all right.
Though some may disagree
I am a huge proponent of it,
I will always push it.
If you're doing those things,
I'm pretty much certain
you're going to see a huge difference.
Not that does mean
there won't be some men still intimated?
Of course not, there are some men
who as I mentioned in the very beginning
are simply intimidated by
the fact that you have money, success,
that you don't tolerate nonsense,
things of that nature.
But a lot of men
this is what it really boils down to.
And so, this is the point that I said
I had to tell you about.
It's not about intimidation,
it's that they don't want to
deal with you, all right.
And again, I say this with love,
I don't say this to hurt you,
to piss you off or anything like that.
I'm not trying to offend you.
I'm trying to keep it as real with you
as possible, all right.
They do not want to deal with it
especially when we're talking about
strong, masculine men.
Because I've heard a lot of women say,
well, it take a strong man
to be a strong woman.
No, a strong man
will not tolerate that.
A strong man, or a masculine man
or a successful man or a great man
he has options.
So, why would he want
to deal with someone
who's coming across as difficult?
Why would he want to deal with someone
who does not want to check
her negative energy
or the fact that she's coming across
in a very negative way?
Like, why is he going to choose that?
He's not, he's not.
And when he doesn't choose it
it's not because he's not strong himself,
it's because he's smart.
Again, no disrespect
but he understands
there is no success to be found
in that dynamic
if someone is going to be
carrying around negative energy
and hiding behind
positive labels to deflect the fact
that they are carry this kind of negative energy.
So, I know it's very easy
and simple to simply say,
or write it off as men are intimidated.
And again, I will repeat one more time
there are men who are intimidated.
But what I want you to do
I want you to look at yourself in the mirror
and I want you to check your energy.
I want you to check your spirit,
I want you to be honest with yourself about
how you're coming across,
I want you to be honest with yourself about
are you being a difficult person that
hell, even other women
don't like being around?
Like, what's really going on?
Let's get to the root of the issue
and not just default to
people are intimidated, all right.
Because there is a role that we play
in changing that dynamic
and we should do the best that we can.
Some things not in our control
or some things we should not
have to adjust and change.
However, the things I mentioned to you
are things to look at
are things to change, all right.
Are things to improve in your life.
And please understand this,
me telling you
to make these adjustments
isn't simply about getting a man
or making men less
"intimated" or less
unwilling to deal with you.
It's about you.
Your quality of life will increase
when you make these changes.
You will start to see
more opportunities open up for you
when you make these changes.
Women, whoever
everyone's going to be more drawn to you
and enjoy being in your presence
when you make these changes.
But again, you will be happier.
And so, now that same mean face,
that same resting B face
we talked about earlier,
it will naturally start to shift.
You will find yourself naturally smiling
because I always tell people
when you are happy from within
smiling becomes natural.
It just happens,
you don't even have to try
you just give off a pleasant vibe.
So, again, I'm giving you all of this
to help you first.
But yes, the byproduct is
you will see even greater success
in all areas of your life
as well as with men.
So, I hope this video
really sheds some light
on this whole issue of
why men are intimidated by you.
But again, I want to talk to you all
give me your feedback,
let me know what you think.
Maybe you think I'm trppin,
even though I'm not,
but just tell me how you’re feeling.
Let's talk about it, lets meet
in the comment section, all right.
But be sure to like this video,
share this video, make sure
you have subscribed this channel,
and keep watching the other videos.
I got a lot more videos for you to check out,
but thank you for watching
and I'll see you in the next one.