Hey guys, so no matter how fun,
sweet, or beautiful she may be,
there are three crucial qualities
you must look for,
you must consider when choosing a woman.
How often have you wasted
too much time, money, and effort
on someone who only turned out
to break your heart?
A throwback.
Maybe you stayed way too long
hoping that your time, attention,
and gifts would fix her or change her
or you just felt like
you'd thrown so much into it.
You've invested so much,
you were just not willing to give up.
Wouldn't it be so much easier to know right away
if she's actually a keeper?
By the end of this video you're going to know
three crucial qualities
you must look for it
when considering a woman.
Examples of what they look like in the real world
and sound like and how to know
if she's really got these three crucial qualities
or if she's fooling you.
To avoid headaches, heartaches, and suffering
you need to be with someone who's amazing
and who treats you like a king.
So, if you're new to my channel, welcome.
I help man decode modern women
so you can find, attract, and keep your keeper.
You're here if you know that
while women especially today
need to learn how to appreciate
and understand men better.
You can only do what you can do.
Welcome to just the tip,
let's jump right in.
Number one, respect.
She needs to respect you
and she needs to respect herself
if she doesn't respect you
she's not there for genuine reasons.
She's either using you
or waiting for the bigger better deal.
Examples of her respecting you
are she listens actively.
This means being fully present,
maintaining eye contact,
not being distracted by gadgets
and responding thoughtfully to what you're saying
not just hogging the whole conversation.
Active listening might sound similar to
I'm really interested in what you're saying,
tell me more.
I hear what you're saying
and appreciate you telling me.
Thanks for being open and honest with me,
it really means a lot.
I'm listening.
Two, she communicates clearly.
A woman can show respect by speaking clearly,
truthfully and kindly
taking the time to understand your perspective
and not just jumping to negative conclusions
making it all about her
or making you need to be a mind reader.
Clear communication might sound similar to,
I want to make sure I understand,
can you clarify that for me?
Hmm, I'm sorry I wasn't clear
let me try explaining in a different way.
Three, she shows appreciation.
This can be as simple as
thanking you for a nice date
or expressing gratitude
for something you've done for her,
not just taking you for granted.
Showing appreciation might sound similar to
thank you for planning such a thoughtful date
I had a really great time.
I really appreciate how supportive you are,
it means a lot to me.
Thanks for taking care of that for me
you're such a lifesaver.
She must also respect herself
if she doesn't respect herself
she'll end up sabotaging the relationship
and acting in terrible ways
that will put you in a living
H-E double hockey sticks.
Some examples of her having self-respect
using the previous examples might sound like
I need to talk with you about something,
can you carve out some time for me?
Hmm,
I need you to understand my perspective.
Let me see if I can explain in a different way.
Okay, let me try again.
Showing respect in a relationship
is about treating each other
with kindness, honesty and consideration
and this actually ties into the second
of the crucial traits
you must look for when considering a woman.
Number two, standards.
she not only appreciates that you have standards,
but she also has standards herself.
When a woman knows you have standards
she feels selected by you,
she feels like you have chosen her,
she feels she has passed your filter system.
And when a woman feels like
she's earned your time and attention
she actually trusts your loyalty more
because she knows you have other options
but are choosing her.
Let's look at some examples of her
appreciating your standards.
Let's say you have a high standard
for honesty in a relationship
and you've told her this
to show appreciation for your standard of honesty
she might say something like.
I really appreciate how honest you are with me,
I know it's not always easy to tell the truth.
I really do admire your commitment
to honesty in our relationship.
You make me feel safe,
I really appreciate that.
By expressing appreciation for your standard,
she shows that she values your priorities
and supports them in the relationship.
This helps build trust, respect,
and connection with you.
And of course, along the same line as
she has her own standards
but this doesn't mean
acting like an entitled princess
with unreasonably high demands
but she does have some reasonable standards.
Key point, when a woman has standards
she vets you.
She has other options,
but she chooses you
and this is actually in your best interest
because when you vet each other
for things that are
important to you in a relationship
you have a much greater chance of success
in having a long-term happy relationship.
So, what's an example of her
expressing her standards?
Maybe you've accidentally done something
that's infringed upon a standard
that she's expressed or maybe
hasn't expressed yet because it hasn't come up.
Like maybe you overestimate the time
required to get to places on time
and she's a stickler for being on time.
It's important for both of you
to communicate your standards
as they come up or in advance
if they're really important and you know
what they are while still being respectful.
She might say something like
huh, okay, I need you to hear what I'm going to say
without interrupting.
Will you do that for me?
Okay, when you're late for our dates
it makes me feel unimportant
and I feel really uncomfortable and self-conscious
sitting by myself for so long.
I really need you to be on time.
Bonus point, if she adds something like
is there something I can do to help you be on time?
This is really important to me
and I appreciate that I can talk to you about it.
Key point,
relationships are not without conflict,
disagreement and disappointment
but being able to get through difficulties
effectively, respectfully
will actually help make a greater
intimacy connection between you
and the next crucial trait
actually ties the first two together
and then I'm going to share with you how to reveal
if she actually really has
these three crucial traits.
Number three, pride.
She's proud of you
and proud to be with you.
Key point, this doesn't mean
she doesn't see your flaws.
In fact, she sees your flaws
and she likes you anyway.
Maybe she even thinks they're cute and quirky
but she may also call you out on
things that aren't serving you
regardless of how it affects her,
maybe being late all the time is
having a negative impact on your work
or your hobbies or social life.
Let's look at some examples
of how she expresses being proud of you
and proud to be with you in real life.
One, she acknowledges you publicly.
This might look like introducing you
to her friends and family
or speaking positively about you to others
or posting about your relationship on social media
publicly acknowledging you might sound like.
I want you to meet my amazing boyfriend.
I was telling my friends about you
and how lucky I feel.
My friends can't wait to meet you.
Two, she shows affection.
displaying affection in public like
holding hands or putting her arm around you
can display how proud she is to be with you.
She has an unreserved and uninhibited
desire for you.
Now, this doesn't mean
she's inappropriately all over you in public.
That might be a sign of insecurity even if she is,
even if it is still a sign
that she's genuinely into you and proud of you,
but what I mean by unreserved desire
is more about her not feeling
self-conscious to be with you
because most of all she wants you to know it
that she's proud to be with you.
Pride in you and uninhibited desire
might sound like,
I love being close to you like this.
You make me feel happy and secure.
I love holding hands with you in public,
I know it's a little thing
but it makes me feel happy.
Three, she's your biggest cheerleader.
Encouraging you and cheering you on in your
goals and accomplishments
is a great way for her to show
that she's your biggest fan
and is proud to be with you.
Maybe she congratulates you on a job well done
or even better she encourages you
when you feel like you've failed.
Being your biggest cheerleader can sound like.
I am proud of all you've accomplished
and I know you're going to continue
to do great things.
I'm so impressed with your hobby/skill.
I like seeing how much you love it.
Babe, I am so proud of you
for acing that presentation,
you worked really hard and it paid off.
Or simply I believe in you.
And if she's not self-conscious of saying
these things in front of others,
double bonus points,
but how do you know she's being honest?
Let's find out how to reveal her true feelings.
The best way to know for sure
that she actually has these
three crucial qualities
is to be a hundred percent authentic
including not hiding your flaws.
Unless key point,
you're committed to changing something
that's not working for you.
If you're not committed
to changing something
that's not benefiting you in your life
right now, starting now,
then you just want to be open, honest,
and true to yourself around her.
Throw your flaws out there
and see how she reacts.
Example, maybe you are chronically late
but because you know it's bothered
other people in the past,
you try to hide that from her at first
eventually going back
to your old habit of being late.
If it's not something you want to
or are willing to work on changing
then just let her see the real you.
Key point, when you are real
with a woman without offense or defense,
it's actually a form of a test
vetting her.
A test to see if the real you
the one you don't want to change
is going to really bother her
and how she's going to react to that.
Sorry ladies, if there are any watching but
we are far too emotionally
trigger happy to not at least subtly react
when we are bothered by something.
So guys, you're going to notice
because here's the reality
maybe she's not bothered by you being late
if she hasn't expressly said that
being a stickler for being on time
is super important to her.
Well, then find out if it is by being you
maybe she likes people watching
or maybe it gives her an excuse
to sit alone with her thoughts for a rare moment.
Remember, no one is perfect
but if she respects you and herself
she appreciates your standards
and has some reasonable ones of her own
and she's proud of you and proud to be with you
that's a really strong start.
And then you can look forward to hearing things
from her that I can't say on YouTube.
Of course, you also need to have compatibility
in some other areas
because even if she does have these
three amazing qualities
if she doesn't have these other qualities,
if you don't have compatibility
in these other areas
then you're still on a path to heartbreak.
So, to avoid the pain of breaking up
with an amazing woman who does have
these three crucial qualities,
you're going to want to watch my video
on the other areas of compatibility
that are non-negotiable
and avoid the early signs of relationship failure.
If you already feel like
you might be entering turbulent waters
then you might want to watch my video on
when not to walk away, when to stay.
Thanks for being here, God bless.