James: GOOD EVENING LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME TO "THE LATE
THIS HERE, THE LATEST OF THE "LATE, LATE SHOW."
THANKS FOR STAYING UP.
LET'S MEET OUR GUESTS ON THE SHOW TONIGHT, HE'S AN EMMY,
GOLDEN GLOBE, AND TONY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW
FROM "NO TIME TO DIE," "WESTWORLD," AND SO MUCH MORE,
THE ILLUSTRIOUS, THE SUPREME, JEFFREY WRIGHT.
IS HERE TONIGHT.
AND HE IS A HE'S A BRILLIANT FILMMAKER YOU
KNOW FROM "BABY DRIVER," "SHAUN OF THE DEAD," AND "THE SPARKS
BROTHERS," HIS REMARKABLE NEW I WAS HIS MOVIE LAST NIGHT IN
SOHO LAST NIGHT T IS SO GOOD T IS SO GOOD.
IF YOU LIKE FILM THAT ARE BRILLIANTLY TOLD WITH
EXCELLENCE-- EXCELLENT PERFORMANCES, GREAT CHARACTERS
AND GOOD STORY, YOU WILL ENJOY THAT FILM.
AND IF YOU DON'T, IF YOU DON'T LIKE THOSE THINGS, THEN YOU HAVE
NO BUSINESS HERE.
IT OPENS IN THEATER THIS FRIDAY, IT IS SO GOOD.
WE LOVE HIM IN THIS SHOW, THE EVER CHARMING EDGAR WRIGHT IS
HERE TONIGHT.
AND LATER WE HAVE A PERFORMANCE FROM GLASS ANIMALS, YOU DON'T
WANT TO MISS IT.
REGGIE'S STILL IN MONTANA TAKING CARE OF HIS MOM.
WE'RE SO GLAD TO HEAR SHE'S DOING BETTER AND SEND THEM BOTH
ALL OUR LOVE.
JEFFREY WRIGHT, EDGAR WRIGHT, TWO WRIGHTS ON THE SHOW.
AND IN HONOR OF THE WRIGHT BROTHERS, IAN, ARE YOU GOING TO
FLY A PLANE OFFER THE ROOF, THAT IS WHAT I HEARD.
>> SEEMED AS GOOD A DAY AS ANY TO TAKE TO THE SKY SO YEAH,
LET'S DO IT.
>> James: ABSOLUTELY.
AND HE'S GOING DO DO, YOU WILL BE IN THE PLANE WITH THE
RIGHTEOUS BROTHERS.
>> YEAH PETE JUST GAVE ME THAT, SENT ME THAT OFF MIC.
>> HE HAS BEEN AWAKE 8-- WAITING WILL00 SHOWS TO MENTION THE
RATOUS BROTHERS AND IT FINALLY HAPPENED.
>> James: YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD LOVE TO DO, IS RE-CREATE
THE SCENE.
AND GO.
I JUST TO GET IN THERE AND JUST MAKE SOME BEAUTIFUL,-- TOGETHER,
DO THAT.
>> I'M HAPPY TO BE THE POTTERY.
I JUST WANT TO BE INVOLVED.
>> James: OKAY, THAT, NOW IT HAS TAKEN A TURN BECAUSE-- I
KNOW WE SAID LAST NIGHT ON THE SHOW THAT WE WERE GOING TO TRY
TO, AS A SHOW COLLECTIVELY BE MORE HORNY.
BUT I WORRY THAT THAT MAY HAVE-- THAT MAY HAVE GONE OVER,
THAT MAY HAVE-- THIS IS OVER.
HEY, TALKING TO GETTING HORNY, WE SPOKE LAST NIGHT ABOUT VIEWS
THAT DIDN'T TURN IN LAST NIGHT, FIRSTLY, HOW DARE YOU AND
SECONDLY THANKS, WELCOME.
NATE, DO YOU WANT TO TEXT PLAIN THIS.
NATE, HAD A BUSINESS, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN RUNNING THIS SIDE
>> ABOUT FIVE YEARS.
>> James: FIVE YEARS NATE HAS HAD A BUSINESS WHICH IS CALLED
HORNY T.BIZ.
>> YEP YZ WHICH IS BASICALLY IT IS A T-SHIRT COMPANY, NOT JUST
T-SHIRTS, MUGS ALL MANNER.
>> BUMPER STICKERS, BABY ONESIES, WHATEVER YOU NEED.
>> James: WHAT-- EVER YOU NEED AND THEY WILL ALL BE MET WITH A
SLOGAN, A TRADITIONAL SLOGAN THAT PEOPLE WOULD KNOW,
SOMETHING, A CATCHPHRASE THAT PEOPLE SAY WHERE YOU WILL REMOVE
ONE WORD AND REPLACE IT WITH THE WORD HORNY.
>> YES.
>> James: SO LIKE LAST NIGHT YOU USED EXAMPLE OF I SEE DEAD
PEOPLE, I SEE HORNY PEOPLE.
>> YEAH, YEAH.
>> James: STUFF LIKE THAT.
BUT I HAVE HEARD THAT THE PLACE HAS BEEN ABUZZ, THE HORNY T.BIZ
HAS JUST GONE THROUGH THE ROOF SINCE WE MENTIONED IT ON THE
SHOW LAST NIGHT, THANK YOU.
>> YOU MENTIONED IT ON THE SHOW, THE SHOW HAS AN INCREDIBLE
REACH.
>> James: YEAH.
>> I MADE THREE SALES.
>> James: THREE.
>> 24 HOURS.
>> James: THREE T-SHIRTS.
>> WE, ONE PERSON BOUGHT A T-SHIRT THAT SAID LIFE SUKS THEN
YOU'RE HORNY.
ANOTHER PERSON BOUGHT A T-SHIRT THAT SAID DON'T HATE ME CUZ I'M
HORNY.
AND THEY ALSO BOUGHT A BUMPER STICK THARY SAID MY OTHER CAR IS
HORNY.
AND THEN ONE PERSON BOUGHT THREE I SEE HORNEE PEOPLE T-SHIRTS.
>> James: STOP.
>> YEAH.
>> James: THIS IS HUGE.
>> SO THIS IS MY LAST DAY.
(LAUGHTER).
>> James: I AM RIGHTLY THINKING THIS MUST BE
300-- 3,000 PERCENT UPLIFT IN SALES ON THE PREVIOUS MONTH?
>> IN YEAR I SOLD TWO THINGS.
SO YES, THIS IS A PRETTY BIG-- DOUBLE, MORE THAN DOUBLED
MY PROFITS.
>> James: I MEAN IF YOU WENT INTO THE SHARK TANK NOW, AND YOU
FLOWERED THAT UP AND YOU SAID OUR PROFITS ARE UP 4,000
PERCENT, MONTH ON MONTH.
>> YEAH.
>> James: I THINK SOMEBODY INVESTS.
>> IT WOULD BE A FRENZY, NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.
>> James: WITHOUT QUESTION, LIKE SHARK WEEK IN THERE, IT
WOULD BE CRAZY.
DAVE, WHAT IS WRONG?
>> I JUST WANTED TO STAY THAT A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO NATE PITCHED
AN IDEA INVOLVING HORNY TS.BIZ TO BE ON THE SHOW AND WE BROUGHT
IT ALL THE WAY UP TO CBS LEGAL AND A DECISION WAS THAT IN ORDER
TO DO THE BID CBS HAD TO TAKE CONTROL OF THE WEBSITE AND NATE
SAID NO, WE'RE NOT DOING THE BIT, I'M NOT GIVING UP THIS
BUSINESS.
>> SO THEY SAID IF WE WANT TO DO ANYTHING LIKE A BIT ON THE SHOW,
THE BIT WAS I THINK WERE YOU GOING TO TAKE IT TO THE SHARKS
OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
>> James: THAT WAS THE BIT, ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, ME AND
YOU WERE GOING TO PITCH HORNY TS.BIZ IN THE SHARK TANK, YES, I
REMEMBER.
>> AND CBS LAWYERS SAID THAT IF WE ARE GOING TO DO THAT I HAVE
TO RELINQUISH ALL RIGHTS TO HORNEE T'S.BIZ.
AND I SAID WELL, HOW MUCH ARE YOU OFFERING ME FOR, AND THEY
SAID NOTHING.
AND THEN, AND THEN, AND THEN I WAS LIKE, WELL, ABSOLUTELY NOT.
LIKE THIS, YOU KNOW, THIS COULD REALLY BE MY BREAD AND BUTTER,
THIS COMPANY.
AND THEN THEY SAID WELL, LEGALLY YOU DON'T OWN ANY OF THOSE
PHRASES, SO WE COULD START HORNEE T'S.NET AND MAKE THE SAME
THING.
>> James: NO, THEY DIDN'T, NO THEY DIDN'T.
>> THEY THREATENED ME.
>> James: STOP.
>> AN I PUT MY FOOT DOWN AND I SAID THEN THE BIT'S NOT
HAPPENING AND I WALKED OUT OF THERE.
>> James: ABSOLUTELY.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).
>> James: AND NOW LOOK, AND NOW LOOK.
AND NOW LOOK, THEY OWN NOTHING OF A BUSINESS WHOSE PROFITS ARE
UP 3,000 PERCENT.
>> I MADE $16.50 LAST NIGHT.
AND THEY DON'T GET ANY OF IT IT.
>> James: THEY GET NOTHING.
WHAT IS NICK DOING.
NICK JUST GOT HIS PHONE OUT.
IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS NICK BERNSTEIN JUST PULLED OUT HIS
CELL PHONE.
WHAT HAPPENED THEN, NICK, WHY IS THE PHONE COMING OUT.
>> IT IS COMING OUT BECAUSE I WAS PRETTY POSITIVE I WAS
GETTING AN EMAIL FROM KRRK BS WHILE THIS WAS HAPPENING.
>> James: WHAT DOES IT SAY?
>> IT SAYS THIS ISN'T GOING IN THE SHOW, RIGHT?
(APPLAUSE).
>> James: WHO-- HANG ON, WHO SENDS SUCH AN EMAIL TO YOU?
WHO IS THAT FROM?
>> IT REALLY CAN'T GO IN THE SHOW.
>> James: NICK, I'M TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW, BROTHER, THIS IS
100% IN THE SHOW, WITHOUT QUESTION IT'S IN THE SHOW.
(APPLAUSE) WHAT DOES BEN THINK ABOUT THIS,
STICK IT TO THE MAN OR WE JUST GOING TO FOLD?
>> STICK IT TO THE MAN.
>> James: YEAH, BABY!
I GET THE FEELING THAT NICK GENUINELY FEELSES LIKE THIS
MIGHT BE THE ONE.
>> THIS COULD BE WHERE THIS ALL COMES CRUMBLING DOWNK YEAH.
>> James: WELL, THERE IS 50 PEOPLE IN HERE.
THEY ARE ALREADY PRIVY TO THE INFORMATION, I IMAGINE, I'VE GOT
SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS, IT COULD-- YOU'RE ON THE CREST OF A
WAVE, BUDDY, ARGUABLY YOU ARE THE MOST POPULAR GUY ON THE SHOW
RIGHT NOW.
I DON'T THINK YOU NEED TO PUT YOURSELF ON THE WRONG SIDE OF IT
IT IT.
(APPLAUSE) HAGAR, YES, HAGAR.
>> I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE SWRZ YOU'RE ONE OF THE PEOPLE
WITHOUT BOUGHT THE SHIRT.
>> I WAS THINKING LAST NIGHT I WANT TO GET A HEAD START ON
GIFTS FOR THE BAND FOR CHRISTMAS.
SO THE THREE I SEE HORNEE PEOPLE SHIRTS-- .
>> James: THAT'S YOU!
NO WAY!
>> OH MY GOD.
THAT'S HILARIOUS.
>> HAGAR EMAILED ALL OF US, LIKE WHAT IS YOUR T-SHIRT SIZE,
SERIOUSLY.
>> James: SO THE REACH OF THE SHOW IS THAT YOU REACHED TWO
PEOPLE.
>> OKAY.
>> James: WELL LOOK, AMERICA IS NOT ONLY HORNY, IT IS STARVED
OF THE VERY THING IT HAS BEEN MISSING ALL DAY.
THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT'S BEEN GOING ON.
THEY DON'T KNOW.
BECAUSE THEY KNOW, CNN, MSNBC, FOX, ALL OF THEM TO THEIR OWN
CONGLOMERATE CORPORATION, RIGHT HERE IS THE ONLY PLACE WHERE
AMERICA GETS THE NEWS.
AND THE BIG NEWS TODAY IS THAT JOE BIDEN IS ABOUT TO MAKE HIS
SECOND OVERSEAS TRIP AS PRESIDENT.
HE LEAVES TOMORROW FOR A WEEK OF MEETINGS IN EUROPE, INCLUDING
THE G-20 SUMMIT IN ROME.
BIDEN WILL BE FOCUSED ON DISCUSSING THE INTERNATIONAL
ECONOMY, AND BEING IN THE BATHROOM WHENEVER AFGHANISTAN
COMES UP.
I'LL BE HONEST, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE G-20 IS, BUT ANYTIME
THERE'S SOMETHING THAT'S JUST A LETTER AND THEN A NUMBER, YOU
KNOW IT'S IMPORTANT.
DON'T YOU, G-20, G-6.
FORD F-150.
AFTER THOSE MEETINGS, THE PRESIDENT FLIES TO GLASGOW FOR A
UNITED NATIONS CLIMATE MEETING.
THIS FEELS LIKE ONE WHERE YOU SHOULD DO IT OVER ZOOM.
DOESN'T IT?
LIKE EVERYONE'S MEETING THIS YEAR
HAVE BEEN VIRTUAL, BUT NO WHAT'S THAT?
A CLIMATE CHANGE MEETING?
FIRE UP MY GIGANTIC JET AND MAKE SURE THERE ARE TWENTY-THREE
S.U.V.s TO MEET ME AT THE AIRPORT AND BECAUSE THE
PRESIDENT AND FIRST LADY ARE GOING TO BE OUT OF TOWN, THE
WHITE HOUSE ANNOUNCED TODAY THAT THEY ARE CANCELING THE ANNUAL
WHITE HOUSE HALLOWEEN CELEBRATION.
THAT'S RIGHT, THE DEMOCRATS' WAR ON CHRISTMAS HAS EXPANDED TO
HALLOWEEN.
IT WAS A BIG DISAPPOINTMENT.
I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE WERE EXCITED TO GO AS SLUTTY MITCH
MCCONNELL.
MOVING ON, DID EVERYBODY SEE THIS?
A JAPANESE COMPANY THAT MAKES DRONES HAS JUST CREATED A NEW
HOVERBIKE THAT CAN FLY FOR FORTY MINUTES.
HERE IT IS IN ACTION, THE COMPANY HELL A DEMONSTRATION
ON A RACE TRACK IN TOKYO, AND THIS THING HAS SOME MOVES.
>> James: LOOK AT THAT.
LOOKS LIKE A JET SKI HAVING A MID LIFE CRISIS.
IF YOU EVERYONE HAPPEN TO SEE ME ON ONE OF THOSE, YOU ONLY NEED
TO KNOW TWO THINGS ONE, I'VE BECOME BECOME BEST FRIEND WITH
TOM CRUISE AND TWO, MY WIFE HAS LEFT ME.
WOULD YOU RIDE ONE OF THOSE.
>> HELL YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
>> James: CAN YOU STILL GO ON THE ROAD WITH IT, CAN IT ONLY
FLY OR RIDE IT AS A BIKE AND THEN BE LIKE STOP IN FOR A BIT.,
BECAUSE THAT SAUL I WANTS I I WANT TO PARTICULAR IT TO A DRIVE
THRU AND SEE THIS F THAT, WITHOUTS.
SIR, YOU CAN'T WALK THROUGH, IT'S 2 A.M.
I WILL BE RIGHT BACK.
>> James: NOT A PROBLEM.
I WOULD BE ALL OVER THAT WITHIN YEAH.
>> James: I WOULD USE IT IN MOMENTS WHERE IT IS QUICKER TO
WALK OR DRIVE.
>> I WOULD BE LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER ON THAT FUNKY DUCK THING, I
WOULD TAKE IT FROM THE OFFICE TO THE KITCHEN.
>> James: YEAH, THAT WAS THE LOWEST POINT OF MY SHALL-- THIS
SHOW.
HAVE WE TALKED ABOUT THIS, HAVE WE TALKED ABOUT IT?
DON'T DO THAT.
>> WE HAVEN'T.
LET'S EXPLORE IT.
BE NICE TO HEAR IT.
>> THIS PARTICULAR AUDIENCE HAS NOT YERD.
>> YEAH-- HEARD.
>> COUNTRY, THESE GUYS DON'T KNOW.
>> James: DO YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU THREE, YOU
THREE, YOU MAY, YOU THREE MAY BE THE NEW OWNERS OF T-SHIRTS THAT
SAY I SEE HORNEE PEOPLE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I SEE, I SEE FIRED PEOPLE.
AND FINALLY WE WANTED TO SHOW YOU THIS.
>> James: AND FINALLY, WE HAD TO SHOW YOU THIS.
A PHOTO OF A SPIDER IN AUSTRALIA HAS GONE VIRAL -- BECAUSE THE
SPIDER LOOKS LIKE ELTON JOHN WEARING GLASSES AND A TOUPEÉE.
DON'T BELIEVE ME?
HERE IT IS HERE.
IT'S SO CUTE.
THAT IS THE CUTEST SPIDER I'VE EVER SEEN.
I WOULD STILL KILL IT IF IT WAS IN MY KITCHEN IN THE MIDDLE OF
THE NIGHT.
BUT THIS ISN'T THE ONLY ANIMAL IN AUSTRALIA THAT LOOKS LIKE A
POPULAR MUSICAL ACT.
TAKE A LOOK AT THESE KANGAROOS, AND THAT'S THE NEWS
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK