[bell ringing]
[cackling]
[screaming]
It's the real Flying Dutchman!
[sighing]
You bet your lily-white livers I'm the Flying Dutchman!
And I'll let you in on a little secret...
I'm going to steal your soul.
[screaming]
Quiet!
You had it coming, you big crybabies!
Every year, people dressing like me.
[whistling]
Turning the Flying Dutchman name into a laughingstock.
But that's not the reason I'm taking your souls.
No, this is the straw that broke the camel's back.
Out of all the Dutchman costumes I've seen,
yours is the most insulting.
Do you mean I'm not scary?
You? Scary?!
[cackling]
Let me tell you about scary, kid.
There's all kinds of scary things in the world.
Spiders are scary.
Uh, I'm scary.
You, you're not scary.
[Mr. Krabs] Oh...!
Oh, my gosh! A floating shopping list!
[screaming]
I'm not a shopping list, I'm a ghost.
[screaming]
[cackling]
Now, listen, SpongeBob.
How do you know my name? Who are you?!
I am the ghost of soda-drink hats,
and I'm here to tell you
that that soda-drink hat you possess is cursed.
- Cursed? - Yes.
It once belonged to some guy who's dead now.
- What guy? - Uh, Smitty something.
Smitty what?
Uh, Smitty Werben Jaegerman Jensen.
He must've been number one.
Number one in Boogeyland!
Now, listen, a curse will descend on you
unless that hat is returned to its owner immediately.
Immediately?
Immediately...
- To its owner? - Yes...
[sniffing] Huh?
Oh, no!
[screaming]
Ooh! Oh, now, lookie here.
Night patties!
Now you're getting the swing of it.
N-N-Night patties?
Order up, people!
- All right, Night Patties! - Tasty!
Smooth.
[sighing]
Smoky.
[panting]
[wailing]
[banging]
- [screaming] - Grandma!
No!
[thundering]
[snoring]
All right, pupil, it's time to apply all you've learned
and frighten this guy's legs off.
With pleasure.
[cackling]
[screaming]
Who's that?
Oh! Is that you, SpongeBob?
[gasping]
[screaming]
[evil laughter]
[screaming]
[whimpering]
Ooh, monster mouth with a bucket of ghost goo.
Very good marks.
[laughing] Nice haunt, swabby!
[laughing]
[screaming]
- How was that? - Even better the third time!
Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no!
Everyone, get out!
Alrighty, boys, party's over.
Time to scoot, honey.
[belching]
Good night, Patrick.
[sighing] Being a ghost can sure tire you out.
Good night, ghost buddy.
That's odd. However shall I get in?
Whoa! Ah!
Huh. Well, that's handy.
[yawning] I am beat.
Well, I don't need to take the stairs.
[sighing]
[snoring]
Hey, Patrick.
I didn't sleep so good last night.
I didn't sleep at all.
I could see through my eyelids.
My eyelids!
Oh, Great-Great-Grandpa Krabs, return to us!
I beseech thee!
Ha! You're older than they are!
Kick 'em out!
I want to speak with my Great-Great Grandpa Jenkins!
Ah!
Get 'em, Ancient-Great-Grand-Pop!
[rubbing]
Ooh?
[snickering]
Youthum Ignorami, Elderus Respecticus!
[laughing] Here we go.
[laughing]
Ha-ha!
You best respect your elders!
My elders will teach your elders a little respect!
Get 'em, Krabses!
Jenkinses, attack!
[screaming]
Hey. Hey! Uh, you guys are kind of bumming us out.
Yes, we don't get to visit the land of the living very often.
And we just want to party!
You two party poopers need to respect your elders
and vacate the premises!
[screaming]
[loud dance music playing]
[laughing] I'll sing ye a song, all right!
A song so terrifying, you'll have to believe I'm a ghost!
[cackling]
This show is going to be so awesome.
Yeah, awesome.
Hit it, fingers!
[playing the organ]
♪ Yo-ho-ho, yo-ho-ooh! ♪
They're good!
♪ Oh, we're the ghouls Of the briny deep ♪
♪ Under the waves We like to creep ♪
♪ Sleeping in coffins With spider webs ♪
♪ As ghostly pillows Beneath our heads ♪
♪ Oh, we're the ghouls Of the briny deep ♪
♪ Under the waves We like to creep ♪
♪ We wear black shrouds That look quite neat ♪
♪ But we don't own shoes 'Cause we have no feet ♪
♪ Ha-ha-ha! ♪
♪ We like to haunt And frighten and scare ♪
♪ 'Til you jump right out Of your underwear ♪
♪ We like to eat Eyes and brains ♪
♪ And drink our grog From rusty drains ♪
♪ We don't keep animals Like cutesy snails ♪
Gary!
♪ Our favorite pet's The Cat-O'-Nine-Tails! ♪
[meowing]
[clapping]
As consort to the spirit world,
I now commence this séance.
Ploobus, plorum, spaghetti, granolum.
I now summon the unliving!
[rumbling]
Why have you disturbed me?
Because, you keep forgetting to replace the toilet paper roll!
As roommates, we all have to do our part.
I know, but it wasn't me this time.
'Twas Gale who left things... unreplenished.
Gale?
Sorry.
[screaming]
Patrick!
Help me!
[laughing]
That almost looks like Sandy!
[laughing]
SpongeBob!
Patrick!
Help us!
Meow, meow!
Look, that almost looked like
Mr. Krabs and Squidward and Gary and Plankton!
[laughing] Funny!
Oh, Patrick, this is hysterical!
[laughing]
Why aren't you laughing?
Patrick? What's wrong with you?
Help me, SpongeBob! My body's butt itches!
Patrick? Is this really happening?
Hey, this isn't funny.
I was wrong, SpongeBob.
Sometimes, scary equals scary!
[screaming]
Say, uh, Rusty, how about spilling the beans
on the old Rusty on Rye recipe?
[mumbling]
Ah, well that was...
just gibberish.
Hmm, I got it!
How bout you write down
the recipe for the classic number 9?
[mumbling]
Oh, right. You're a ghost.
Hmm, what if you just show me how you make one?
[mumbling]
Whoa!
Gee, Rusty, quite a setup you got here.
[screaming]
Everybody down on the floor!
It's the Fisherman!
[screaming]
No, not the Fisherman!
Now hand over the moola.
[whimpering]
[ding]
[whimpering]
Well, good evening, sir. Welcome to the Krusty Krab.
Give me all your money!
Well, I'm always glad to help a fellow out with a loan.
Loan? I don't want a loan.
I'm the Fisherman! I'm robbing the place.
Well, that is downright unfriendly.
I'm putting you under fry cook's arrest.
Huh?
Oh, really?
[laughing]
[screaming]
[straining]
[laughing]
[straining]
Not so fast.
[struggling]
Yah!
[grunting]
[screaming]
[grunting]
Well, looks like the hook is on the other fin now, huh?
[wheezing]
[tires screeching]
I didn't know the buses ran this late.
They don't.
Well, they're dropping someone off.
[screaming]
The Sash-Ringing...
the Flash-Singing...
the Bash-Pinging...
The Hash-Slinging Slasher!
[crying]
At last you understand! We're doomed!
No, that's not it.
I am just so touched that you would go through the trouble
to dress up as a ghostly fry cook
and stand on the other side of the street,
just to entertain me!
You must really like me!
SpongeBob, there are two problems with your theory.
One, I hate you,
and two, how can that be me when I'm standing right here!?
[clanging]
[screaming]
[both] The Hash-Slinging Slasher!
[wailing and cheering]
All right, guys, I hate to be a party pooper,
but it's a little late for all this noise.
Time to wrap it up.
Oh...
Big face doesn't want us as patrons anymore!
Maybe we should make like a tree...
and leave!
[laughing]
Now wait just a minute, that is private property!
Maybe you guys should leave!
Oh, yeah?
Do I have to call--
Eww, ectoplasm.
Enough fooling around!
Let's have a good ol' time, like we used to!
[laughing]
[gasping]
[laughing]
Eeh!
♪ When you hear The lonesome ring ♪
♪ Of chimes That bring the spirits singing ♪
♪ Soon your spine is tingling ♪
♪ And there's just One thing to say: Ahh! ♪
♪ Eyeballs in the dark dilating Now your heart is palpitating ♪
♪ And there's only Just one thought ♪
♪ That you can convey: Ahh! ♪
♪ Terror all around you! You can't get away! ♪
♪ We take pride in making sure You have a frightful stay ♪
♪ Join the wretched chorus In the nightmare play ♪
♪ And remember It's all you can scream ♪
♪ At the ghost café! ♪
[cackling]
[laughing]
[screaming]
[screaming] What are you doing here?
[screaming]
Well? Are you two going to say something, or do I have to--
No! Stay back!
What is the matter with you two?
D-Don't hurt us!
It was an accident!
What are you two talking about?
[viscous squish]
Ah! Look what you've done to me!
Oh, when I get my hands on you, I'll--
Please, Mr. Squidward's ghost! Spare us your ghostly anger!
Oh, yes, Mr. Squidward's ghost! Please don't haunt us!
We'll do anything you want! Just have mercy on us!
Enough!
Listen up,
Squidward's ghost is feeling unusually generous today.
He hath decided to spare ye a horrible fate.
[hissing]
You cheated me!
Take this horrible curse away!
I want a refund!
All sales are final from the Flying Dutchman,
especially for a selfish shellfish like yourself.
Try saying that three times fast.
Your soul's going in me fanny pack of despair!
Now pay up!
Huh?
An I.O.U.?
[chuckles] Yeah, well, I sort of sold my soul already.
What? To who?
Those guys.
We were here first, pops.
We've all got claim on Krabs' soul.
Get to the back of the line.
Now, now, I'm sure we can sort this out.
You too, SpongeBob?
He was five bucks short on payday.
[sighing]