- When you think about
the first time we met,
what do you remember feeling?
When I popped out...
- Grossed out because
placenta everywhere.
- Placenta.
- I mean, I guess even at what like
15... 15 and a half?
When you were born, I just...
- That's crazy.
- Cried a lot.
I cried a lot.
I remember I was really nervous.
I mean, so I was like running around
asking like doctors
and nurses like,
what's the probability
of her having cleft lip?
What's the probability?
Like, I was so nervous because
I'm- like having a cleft lip
now isn't a big deal at all.
But I got made fun of a lot
when I was a kid,
and I really didn't want that for you.
So I was really, really relieved
that you didn't have cleft lip
when you were born.
- I didn't know that.
- And, you know, I just didn't know.
I don't know, I don't really know.
I think I just felt like everything
like there's not any
one thing I can pinpoint.
- Yeah. - It was just a lot. A big thing.
- I can't-
I forgot you were 15
and a half years old.
That's insane.
Wow. - Yeah.
- Well...
- Why am I in your life?
- I don't know, bro. Just kidding.
Why?
Yeah, I mean, I don't know.
Pretty general answer.
But like I said, I've told you
many times for I think the timing is...
is right.
It was just meant to be
when we were both fully
healed and ready to like, go
go into it like clean slate.
Obviously, to the extent
that we could like you said,
you know,
once we started building
our relationship,
you healed a lot more and things.
But I think we're both healed enough
to like, go into it.
And now, yeah, the things that you've.
You've taught me in the last year,
while it's been an intense
one for me, I think that
you're definitely around to help
guide me through that,
because you've been-
you've been through some shit,
you've been through
all the things.
So for me to feel like I'm
going through this intense
learning curve right now,
I think it's really good timing
and that's kind of why it was now
one of the reasons.
Obviously, there's like 1,000,000, but
with like the advice
you've been able to give me as I'm
navigating the shit life
throws at you when you're 25...
- Yeah.
Yeah, I don't- I don't
care what, no matter
what advice I would give my
15 year old self if I can.
If I won't-
First stop drinking. - Yeah-.
- Because I wouldn't be, I'd still be.
Maybe I'd be around
while you were growing
up, but I'd still.,,
be it.
An alcoholic.
I mean. - Yeah, yeah.
- So they couldn't,
so it would have been pointless
for me to be in your life
then anyways.
So yeah, I guess
it's just the way that,
you know, the universe
has planned out, I guess.
- Yeah, I mean, I think so.
I've always said that- again
I don't know if that sounds
mean or not, but
I always have felt like
I would have preferred
you to be absent
than to be like half assed in.
Being an alcoholic.
You know, so.
- What is your biggest struggle
right now as father and daughter? And
what can we do to
better overcome it?
You would be the
daughter and I'd be the father.
- Oh, okay, thank you for clarifying that.
That's good.
I think we talked about it
a lot yesterday, like,
just the father daughter
roles, because we
get along so well,
and even though you definitely
have taught me a lot
like I said, you've given me
a lot of advice that I view
as you being my dad, I guess we're
we've had a struggle a little bit to
find our groove in...
you know, having to put your foot down or
teach me lessons and
navigate how to teach me lessons
when I'm already 25, not 15.
And...
struggling with-
With that, I'd say, is just the.
The biggest one when it-
when it comes time to be like, hey,
you know, ultimately
you're my dad, not just like my pal.
And how can we work
on that together?
Just communicating the way that we
that we do, I guess,
talking it out for hours.
Which you're pretty good at,
but
just continuing to express, you know,
whatever the
the issue is.
- I agree.
I mean, we've only really been
in each other's lives really
for like a year,
so we're still kind
of sort of figuring out
how we fit in each other's lives.
And
you said once before that, like,
you know, we started out
friends and,
you know, and it's easy to be friends,
but then at some point
I started acting a certain way
or something,
I guess like laying down
the law or something and you're like,
Oh yeah, he's now, he's being a
dad instead of friend.
And
I guess it's just...
Trying to figure out how that
how that all works out.
Mm.
- Well,
the balance between the two.
- Mm-Hmm.
- I think we do a good job
of communicating. - Yeah.
- I honestly do.
- Me too.
- So that's how we overcome it.
- What's one moment
from my childhood
that you deeply regret
missing and why.?
- The whole thing.
Yeah.
- Anything specific?
- I do wish sometimes
that
I could be there when you like
your first boyfriend
took you on a date
and I had like biker
friends, and we're like:
Hey, come hang out
with us for a minute,
and we're like, Yeah,
we'll all kill you if you hurt her.
Thank you. Very cool.
- Yeah, I really I missed that.
I needed that for sure.
- Yeah.
- I actually
I don't have anything specific either,
but I was thinking
that I wish you had been around
for advice on my relationships,
actually, like early on.
Because
as you know, it's
been an intense dating
year for me since I've known you,
which is so random, but
so much of like the advice and the-
The comfort and like the openness
about talking about it.
I mean, again, like who's to say that
ten years ago
you would have had the same advice
and you would have
known what to say, but
I've said multiple times
that I feel like
the things I'm learning
in the dating world right now
and about love and heartbreak and loss
and all these things, like,
I feel like a lot of my friends
went through in high school or college
when they had like their first love
and they had these
things, and I didn't
really have that until now.
So I'm grateful I have you for
this intense phase.
But I obviously still
did have relationships
and like heartache and things
growing up, and I wish
I had been thinking like, not that
I wish, I guess,
but wondering what
it would have been like
I guess if I had
advice from you during those times,
or you to lean on during those times.
But
That's one.
But who's to say?
- Yeah.
What-
what do you think I need to hear?
Nothing without,
I already know everything.
- Nothing.
I know it all.
Well, maybe from yesterday
you need- in a life sort of way
hear that you don't owe me anything.
It sounds like that's
something that you
think about a lot and
has weighed on you, and
I can definitely
tell you that I don't
you don't owe me anything.
So hopefully you can hear that.
And that's like a weight
off your shoulders
more often than not.
- That is something I probably could
hear over and over every day and
probably never actually
hear. - You're so needy, dude.
- But
uh, yeah, well, that's nice.
That's nice to hear.
I mean, let's get a
little recording of that,
and I just play it
every once in a while.
- I'll send you a PDF once a week.
How do you love me?
- I don't really understand that.
- I don't know how to take it, either.
How- if I read it, super slow.
- How do I love you?
Let me count the ways.
As much as I wish that
you weren't like me with your
bullishness and strong
headedness and- I love it,
it makes me crack a smile all the time.
Your sense of humor and...
Your smart-aleckness...
I love that about you.
I love...
And as much as I
can't relate on some levels,
how much you care about other people
and how compassionate you are.
I love that about you.
I mean, just 1,000,000
different ways of how I love you.
I see, like when you help me at work
and I see you trying to
like lift stuff or do stuff,
I'm like, there's no way
she's going to be able to do that.
And you might even know
that there is no way
you will do it, but you try anyways.
And I like that.
I like that toughness
about you.
You're a softie that cries
every other day for an hour.
But you're pretty tough.
- It's balance. - And I like that.
- Thanks.
- Hey there!
Thanks so much for watching.
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