Hi, it's Sarah Lobegeiger de Rodriguez
and welcome to another episode of The Little Shot.
How sarcastic are you?
And also how do you feel when it hits you?
Everyone uses sarcasm differently.
And today I thought it's great to check the three main ways
sarcasm
can be used so you can take more care when using sarcasm.
Our first form of sarcasm that we'll talk about today is face
saving sarcasm.
Now this refers to moments when you might use sarcasm.
If you're feeling at risk of violation or personal put down.
In this context, your sarcastic remark serve to make you save
face.
It's not recommended to use sarcastic remarks with a new
acquaintance
as you're at higher risk of being misunderstood and
misinterpreted.
Sometimes, though, when your conversation partner is feeling
awkward,
(let's just say they just met you) they may use sarcasm as a
way to compliment
you or add humor. And we often call this an ironic compliment.
I want you to watch out if you're using ironic compliments
in this kind of context,
because research shows that lots of people are inclined to take
these comments
as negative. In particular, younger people are less likely
to take ironic compliments well,
also, if you're female, you're more likely to read negativity
into ironic compliments.
Our second form of sarcasm relates to embarrassment
diffusion sarcasm.
Now this is a bit of a trouble zone. If you're embarrassed,
there is a case where
you may have done a great job at something,
but you're trying to deflect attention from yourself so you
don't look so self-seeking
by making a sarcastic remark.
In this instance, the sarcastic comment reduces the positive
outcome
you personally achieved that you deserve merit for
and instead downplays your success. This is a common form
of self deprecation,
and it's not recommended if you want to increase your impact.
One research study in fact, suggests that females are more
likely to make ironic
comments about themselves and males.
So ladies, watch out this can really work against your
communication impact.
You can learn more about why you should avoid self deprecation in
a video I released
recently, I linked it above for you.
Another form of sarcastic behavior that has a high degree
of risk when you're
communicating relates to frustration diffusion sarcasm.
Now when people are frustrated, they are at more risk of using
sarcasm
to cope with the annoying things going on around them.
I don't recommend using sarcasm in this instance with others
when stress levels increase
because when you're stressed, the effort to process
information cognitively
starts to deteriorate, and people will be more likely to
misunderstand your sarcastic
remark, because they have less headspace to process it.
And they're less likely therefore, to give you the
benefit of the doubt.
This can account for why someone may erupt if you make a
sarcastic comment
in a stressful and frustrating situation. Watch out, comments
in these moments won't
help you diffuse tension even if it was your attempt to be
humorous.
Instead, sarcastic remarks will set conflict alight and make
your conversation partner
potentially feel that you're mocking them.
I also want you to watch out for when you personally feel
frustrated,
because we know from research that individuals are more likely
to make sarcastic
remarks about themselves when frustrated.
And this is a higher case scenario if you're female.
Just remember, your words have impact on how you see yourself
even if no one is watching or tuning in.
Strive to speak about yourself with a positive attitude and
growth mindset
as this will help you build the skill to use affirming and
positive language rather
than ironic and negative statements towards others
when you encounter stressful moments.
I found the research that I did around sarcasm over the past
week really fascinating,
because I learned that most people are more likely to be
sarcastic in negative
situations, which definitely makes sarcasm quite risky when
stress levels are high.
I want you to aim instead for empathetic communication,
or simply show active listening. The other thing that I found
really fascinating
in my reading over the past week of all the journal articles is
that women in general
were found to be less sarcastic towards others than men,
but more sarcastic towards themselves than men.
Ladies, let's get some positive self worth into how we
communicate about ourselves.
I'm sure this Little Shot episode is giving you a few
things to think about regarding
sarcasm. Now over to you.
How does sarcasm make you feel personally when you're on the
receiving end of it?
And also, do you notice any environments where you're more
likely to use it?
Let me know in the comments below.
I have loads more communication tips that you definitely don't
want to miss out on.
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and stay in touch for upcoming videos.
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Thank you so much for watching, and I'll see you next time.