OH MY GOD!
NO NO NO NO, DON'T DO IT!
Don't do what?
JUMP?!
*WHOOSH*
*GASP*
*click*
*FWOOSH*
Relax! I am unharmed!
YOU ASSHOLE, YOU COULD HAVE CAUGHT THAT GUY!
Oh... Bummer.
SHOULDA HAD A JETPACK!
(car crash sound)
Welcome back to your local Channel 8 News
I'm Chip Chapley.
Is pregnancy linked to CHILDBIRTH?
Our viewer poll results may surprise you
But first, lets go to our weatherman extraordinaire, Sam Persam. Sam?
Thanks Chip! It's a going to be a warm one out there today which is great news for anyone on our Birthday List.
*Music*
I didn't know it was your birthday Sam....
Uh, Happy Birth-
Thanks Chip! A lot of you at the studio seem to space on that one, even though many of you RSVP'D for the party at my place last night.
Let's talk about this another time, eh Sam?
Today's forecast includes about 20 pounds of uneaten macaroni salad.
This just in, any party with 20 pounds of macaroni salad is a party this newscaster is glad he missed.
Weather Alert!
Fuck you Chip.
*Grunts*
*Punch Noises*
Breaking News, a fight has broken out at the Channel 8 News Headquarters between our own Chip Dale and an unknown assailant, I hope he's okay.
Yeah I'm fine.
*Punch Noise then a sound of being hurt*
Police have been dispatched, but we're unable to respond due to the blizzard outside...?
*Weird Blizzard Noises*
Really?!
A blizzard Sam?!
I'm not a good weatherman...
We're gonna check in real quick with my fist, it appears to be approaching Sam's face.
Huh?
*Hurt Noise*
(car crash sound)
Want Joking Hazard? Buy it now!
Links in the description!
*Panting Noises*
*Cheering and Panting*
*Cheering*
Grrr!
Mr. Tortoise, Mr. Tortoise! How does it feel to be the winner of the big race?
*Intense Music*
*Deep Voice*
I haven't won yet...
*Glaring*
*Glaring, Stalking and more intense music*
Intense/Sad Music
Now I have won.
(vomit sound)
*Grunting Noises*
STREET FIGHTER! BURNIN' RUBBER 5 HD SPECIAL!
ROUND 1
FIGHT!
*Punching Noises*
HADOOKIN!
*More punching noises*
*POW*
K.O.
YOU WIN!
*Weird Noises*
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!?!
QUIEEEETTTT!
it's the purple shirted eye stabber and bearwolf
WHAT?!?!
shhhh...
Oh...I thought he was gone forever!
No, he's here in this very building. Keep an eye out.
Ok :)
my god.
Psshh..That was SO predictable.
QUIET! I wanna see what happens NEXT.
*Sigh* Don't tell me you enjoy this crap.
The purple shirted eye stabber COMEPLETLY sold out.
Ohwoo, he stabs people's eyes
*Sigh* What a load of-
OH MY GOD!
*Scary Music*
Well Howdy ya'll! Looks like you've got a blown transformer. Mind if I-
GUAAAAHUUUUUAAAA!
AAAAAHHHHH!
AAAAHHHUAAA
AAAAUAAAA
AAAAAHHHHH
AAAAHHHH
AAAAAAHHHHH
AAAHHH
AAAAUUUAAAAA
AAAAAAAAUUUAAAAAAH
Really?
They're going with the self-reference route.
I'm sure that Eye Stabber sucks now.
Yeah dude...
Well, fuck you guys! Let's see you do better!
And there you have it. Mr. Eye Stabber killed these men in cold blood, Your Honor!
Sentence to Death. Electric Chair.
*smash*
But Your Honor, I'm the purple shirted eye stabber
Wait, but that means....
OOOOHHHHH! NOOOOOO! KRGGGHHHAA *thud*
And there you have it.
Looks like justice is blind...
*Loud Cheering*
(vomit sound)
*Drunk Singing*
This party's CRAZY!
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
It's a shame we- It's a shame we outta booze.
Wait..
Naa Naa Naaa. I better wrap this up and getting people outta here
Wait, wait wait wait. I can get more party for the booze. *Jiggles keys*
No way... NO WAY
I'm not get-
Y-Your more drunk than I am!
I'm not THAT drunk
Don't poop on the party.
Really don't think you should be doin' this man.
*Hic* Your not my BABYSITTER! I'll goin' to the liquor store down the street.
Alright, if you insist...
*Vehicle Starting*
Wait-Wait-Wait-Wait-Wait
The.......Can you pick up some ice on the way around? *Winks* Thanks dude!
*VROOOOOOMM*
AAAAAAAHHHH GOOOOOOOODDDDD AHHHHHHH!
Give me your purse ya dumb BITCH!
AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
thanks!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
*splash*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
And then she's all like "I don't eat pasta and I'm lik-
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
*Boop*
OOOOOHHHHHH MMMMMYYYYY, NOOOOOOOOO
aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Heh.
I've made it.
OH SHIT!
I forgot to get the ice
*tire squeal then a loud VROOM then some more screaming and crash sound*
Name?
Uh..... Nathan Summers.
Let's see......Nathan Summers...
OH MY GOD! NO, NO, NO! THERE'S BEEN A MISTAKE!
What?
You aren't supposed to be dead yet.
I could lose my job over this..
Ok....
This isn't good, this isn't good at all. I have to send you back
You must wait until it's your time.
Ughhh...
Man..
I must've hit my head on every step on the way down.
Where was I?
Suicide huh, heh heh. See you in ghost town.
OOOOOOOOOO!
OOOOOOOOOOO!
OOOOOO.....!
*Gasp*
Oh darn it, must've been to close to the edge..
*crash* *gasp*
Heh Heh, jeez whiz, that gave me quite start. I need to fix this old thing.
*Light flickers on and off* OOOOOOOOOOO!
*destroys everything in house and is being ghosty like*
Uh, oo
W-What?
What the dickens?
Steve?
Dave!
Woah! I haven't seen you since you died!
Yeah! Now you're dead too!
Fantastic!
So good to see you, old friend!
Likewise!
So..
What do ghost do for fun?
I don't know, I always just kinda....haunted you?
Lets keep doing that! *Plays with Dave's dead body*
(vomit sound)
Good evening sir and madam. Welcome to Le Telepathe. Have you dined with us before?
No this our first time.
We've heard great things
Hmmhhmmm. The great things you've heard madam are quite correct.
So can we see the menu?
There are no menu's I'm afraid.
Are there any specials tonight?
HA HA HA!
Every dish is special sir.
You see each meal is tailored to the inner most cravings of each specific diner.
Our chef's monitor is customers brain activity and create a culinary masterpiece based on the individual wishes.
That's fantastic! So how do we order?
No need to order sir, your minds have already informed our chef of the dish you desire.
This is amazing!
I wonder what we're gonna get!
I'm so excited!
I hope mine is made of chocolate...or bacon...or caviar
Me too...I can't wait to find out...Happy anniversary sweetheart.
Dick: Your chocolate-caviar fountain with bacon crackers, madam...
Sonny: This looks AMAZING!
And for you sir...
Your DICKS.
Senna: What The SHIT is that?!?!
Your dinner sir..
DICKS......
T-There must be some kind of mistake...I-I-I don't-
Steven..
Why did he bring you DICKS?
I-I-I don't know! T-This is not what I ordered..
Sir...
You are telepathically monitored and this is most certainly the dish your brain desired.
My brain... didn't desire THIS.
We are a respectable establishment and can assure you that your brain specifically said..
"Ooh I hope I get a big pile of dicks to put in my mouth, that would be so yummy wummy."
Sir..
W-Well I don't want it. This is a mix up!
STEVEN, you're making a SCENE.
We cannot just replace the DICKS you ordered because you changed your mind.
Send it back and bring me something else RIGHT NOW.
You're RUINING our anniversary!
Have fun with your... plate of DICKS.
I'll get your check sir...
Oh my god, that's so FUCKING GOOD!
*Sucks all the DICKS.....*
*Lady singing*
Yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy PIE!
YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY PIE!
YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY PIE!
YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUM YUM YUM YUM
YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUMMY PIE!
And now the star of the show, the man you've all been waiting for...The Master of Disaster, The Sultan of Cannonpultin, The High King in Biking........ACTION STAN TONI!
*VROOM*
*buzz*
*Sizzling/Vroom sounds*
*vrrr poof*
*VROOM*
*clank*
WHOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOO