- Ever try to smuggle a monkey in your butt?
No? Oh okay.
'Cause these people did.
In the past, people have tried to smuggle
all kinds of things illegally.
And while drugs and money are common, the following stories
are not only going to take the cake for the craziest
but shock you that someone actually tried
to smuggle these things.
Seriously, they're disturbing.
Here are the 10 most insane smuggling failures.
Number one are cocaine breast implants.
For many women, getting breast implants
is both a big decision and very expensive.
However, for one particular woman
traveling from Colombia to Spain, hers were even more so.
Of course, they weren't your average silicone implants.
No, instead, these particular ones
were filled with a different kind of cushion: cocaine.
In 2012, upon returning from a trip to Bogota,
this anonymous woman was asked questions by security
specifically about the reasons for her trip.
Due to her answers being rather suspicious,
she was handed over to the police
for further questioning and physical examination.
That's when they noticed fresh scars
and bloody gauze under her breasts.
At that point, it was off to the hospital,
where they found three pounds of cocaine
keeping her Bs looking like Ds.
Now, as insane as this smuggling scheme might sound,
it has actually happened many times.
Young women, the majority of whom
are traveling from the world's cocaine capital, Colombia,
have been caught with large cocaine implants
at airports in Spain, Germany and, of course, Colombia.
That? Oh, don't mind that.
That's baby powder.
Number two are 18 tiny monkeys.
Okay, this one's just bananas.
In 2010, at Mexico City's international airport,
38-year-old Roberto Cabrera was stopped
when security noticed that not only was he acting strangely
but there were odd bulges under his clothes.
Once he was pulled aside and searched,
security found 18 titi monkeys wrapped in socks
in a girdle around the man's waist.
Unfortunately, once removed from the girdle,
two of the poor monkeys were found dead.
Cabrera, who had brought the monkeys over from Lima,
said that the monkeys had started out in his luggage,
but then were placed in a girdle
before he went through customs
to avoid them going through X-ray machines.
The endangered titi monkeys were purchased in Lima for $540
and would sell for a total of $18,000,
minus the two that didn't make it.
This idiot smuggled frail animals,
putting them through life-threatening conditions,
gambled his freedom away with super obvious illegal items,
and did it all for a few thousand bucks.
Monkey business is bad business, pal.
Number three is a human head.
Okay, bringing souvenirs back from a vacation is one thing.
Bringing an item illegally across a border
to practice voodoo magic is another one entirely.
In 2006, Myrlene Severe, a 30-year-old woman
traveling from Haiti back to Miami,
was caught with a human skull in her suitcase.
What raises the creepiness factor in this story
is the fact that the skull still had hair on it,
as well as a little bit of skin.
Seriously?!
In case you didn't know,
it's obviously a little bit against the law
to bring human remains into a country
without a death certificate or, you know, a good reason.
But of course, she didn't seem to care.
She just wanted to perform some magic
and keep evil spirits away.
That's not too much to ask!
As a result, Myrlene was sentenced to two months probation
and was ordered to pay a $1,000 fine.
The head's origin is still unknown.
And as for where Myrlene's head was
when she decided to purchase and transport
the insanely creepy skull is too unknown.
Number four is a woman in the dashboard.
Imagine reaching for something in your glove compartment
of your car and a hand passing you
the necessary documents back.
Kinda sounds like something out of a horror movie
or a really messed up version of Knight Rider.
Well, not in this case!
In 2001, at the US/Mexico border, a man was stopped
and asked for proper documentation
before he could fully enter the country.
When the man reached into the glove compartment
for his paperwork, a human hand reached back
and gave it to him.
Of course, the trained eyes of the guards watching over him
noticed immediately and investigated,
finding an adult woman stashed away
inside the car's dashboard.
Usually, smuggled people opt to hide
in the trunk of a car during border crossings.
But this person, who had clearly done this before,
was crafty and actually built
a custom hiding space in the car.
And he would've gotten away with it too
if his passenger wasn't so gosh darn helpful.
Oh, you need a piece of paper?
Here you go!
Number five are steroids.
Some people will do whatever it takes
to bring substances across borders
and into countries that consider them illegal.
One such substance is steroids.
In 2008 in Australia, customs caught sight
of 150 bottles of suspicious oils from Thailand
that didn't include a permit
from Australia's Therapeutic Goods Administration.
But upon closer inspection, what was labeled as gay lube oil
was found to contain Deca Durabolin and testosterone,
also known as liquid steroids.
Once they were discovered and confiscated,
customs officials began looking into what appeared to be
a drug smuggling network operated by Australian biker gangs.
The gangs also attempted to smuggle illegal steroids
in other items, including green tea packets,
facial creams, and other sex-based products.
In this case, I'm guessing the fact
that the oils were strictly marked homosexual
may have probably given something away.
I don't think lube has a sexual preference.
Number six are live hummingbirds.
When caught breaking the law once, you figure a person
probably wouldn't attempt a repeat offense.
Well, this wasn't the case in 2011,
at least not for one anonymous Dutch man
who was traveling into France
with a little extra something-something in his pants.
When airport security noticed
that the man was acting a little strange,
they pulled him aside and searched him.
They quickly discovered something alarming between his legs.
More than a dozen live hummingbirds were wrapped in fabric,
tucked into little pockets in a pouch,
and sewn into the front of the pants he was wearing.
You know, in retrospect, this coulda been one of those cases
where answering honestly about a suspicious behavior
might've actually made the authorities laugh it off
and leave him without even searching him.
"They're hummingbirds."
(laughing) "You, get out, go through, you're stupid."
Telling anyone that you have a dozen hummingbirds
in your pants is bound to get a reaction of disbelief.
I mean, I couldn't even begin to imagine how it would feel
to have that many (clearing throat) peckers down there.
(laughing) Thank you.
(audience applauding) Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, tip your waiter.
Okay.
Number seven are cell phones and accessories.
How perfect would it be if a cat could be trained
to go from one place to another carrying a message?
Well at the Romero Nobrega high-security prison in Brazil,
prison guards caught a cat
making its way towards the prison walls
wearing what appeared to be a thick coat.
Once the feline was caught and the coat was removed,
guards found four cell phones,
four chargers, and seven SIM cards.
Clearly, someone was trying to help out
a few of the prisoners and enlisted the help
of one of nature's stealthiest felines.
After doing a thorough search of the prison,
security wasn't able to find out
which prisoner was to receive the goods
and the cat was released unharmed.
Cats can exhibit some pretty suspicious behavior.
But when you see a cat wearing a shady-looking coat,
that's when you know trouble's brewing.
Also, be on the lookout for cats in dark alleyways
that smoke cigarettes and play with switchblades.
You stay away.
And cat burglars.
(chuckling) Cat burglar.
Number eight is a woman in a suitcase.
A lot of people have made the joke
about going on a vacation with someone
just by being stuffed into their suitcase,
but no one would actually ever do that, right? (laughing)
Well, although not for vacation purposes,
a 48-year-old Thai woman named Pornkamol, great name,
was stuffed in a suitcase in 2013.
The smuggler, a 56-year-old man from Phoenix,
tried to drive into Arizona from Mexico
and was stopped at the border on December 30th.
His vehicle and luggage were both searched,
which is when guards found the woman
trying to hide under a pile of clothing.
Both the driver and the smuggled suitcase-dweller
were brought into custody.
But not only that, just 10 days prior to her discovery
in the luggage, Pornkamol was denied admission
and deported from Los Angeles.
In her desperate attempt to gain entry
into the United States, she decided to use
her best hide-and-seek game tactics by hiding under clothes.
(laughing) "You can't find me.
"I'll never be found."
Number nine are immigrants inside Rolls Royces.
Okay, I understand the idea
of rolling into a location in style,
but I think this one might be
crossing the line just a little bit.
In 2011, a police-trained sniffer dog
found nine illegal male immigrants
that had stowed away in empty shells
of Rolls Royces in France.
The car bodies were en route to the Rolls Royce factory
in Goodwood, West Sussex, where they,
and hopefully not the immigrants,
would be turned into fully fledged cars.
As it turns out, the immigrants were from Africa
and were probably hoping for a better life.
Unfortunately for them, had the sniffer dog not found them,
officers at the border probably would've found them instead,
either by doing physical searches
or by using a heartbeat detector.
Luckily, there was no damage done to the shells of the cars,
but the men's egos were severely damaged
when their immigration bragging rights had been taken away.
You know, because claiming to have cruised
into a country illegally
while in a quarter-of-a-million-dollar car
would've been a good story.
And number 10 is a live tiger cub.
Do you think you'd be able to tell the difference
between a stuffed animal in a suitcase and a real one?
Well, luckily, if you can't for some reason,
the X-ray machines at the airport can.
In fact, in 2010, they were able to find
a small two-month-old tiger cub in a suitcase,
sedated and sleeping next to a stuffed one.
A 31-year-old Thai woman named Piyawan
had attempted to take the cub with her
on a flight from Bangkok's international airport to Iran.
However, after being found out, she used the age-old excuse
of claiming that the bag wasn't hers
and she was carrying it for someone else.
Just for fun, she also added
that she wasn't aware that the cub was inside.
The cub, which would've sold for $3,200 on the black market,
was later brought
to the conservation department's rescue center.
I'll admit that having a tiger as a pet
seems pretty cool for some, but I wouldn't suggest it.
That little cat's gonna turn into a big cat.
And that big cat's gonna have a big appetite. (chomping)
So, those were the 10 most insane smuggling failures.
But today's question is, have you ever heard
of any other stories of people
trying to smuggle crazy things?
Hopefully not your friends,
and if so you might wanna leave their name out of it.
If so, leave your response below
because I'll be reading through them
and I'm going to pin the best comment to the top.
As always, thank you guys so much for coming by today.
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at exactly 3pm Eastern Standard Time,
because I'll have a brand new video for you.
I'll see ya then.