Gentlemen, in today's video, we are not going to be talking about style.
No, instead, I want to talk about a lot of the bad advice I see being given out there. This is geared towards you,
younger men, you're 17, you're 27, you're looking for direction.
And you see guys like Andrew Tate teaching you what it means to be a man. You see the guys over at Fresh & Fit giving
you advice on how to date women. Or maybe you've seen a video with Aman Ghazi and he's going to rescue you with his financial insights. Now, let me be clear.
I'm not d***ing on these guys. I've watched quite a few of their videos and these guys
get a lot of things right. The power of entrepreneurship, work ethic, personal responsibility, the importance
of fitness and health, being mentally tough, being financially literate, having confidence.
That being said, a broken watch can still be right twice a day. What I mean by that is you
can be right on a lot of things, but you can also be wrong on a lot of things. First up,
shortcuts, hacks. that are too good to be true. Again, I'm not discounting Iman and Tate's
business acumen, but I do feel the marketing oversells the product. I mean even the top
business schools like Wharton, Harvard, and Stanford, they don't guarantee you results.
And as a YouTuber, I understand sensationalism, it sells, but it's got to be done. ethically
especially if you're targeting young people. The next thing they get wrong is that they've
got a skewed vision of the nature of women. Now, of course, women can be greedy, deceptive,
they can steal, they can be downright evil. But gents, the same thing can be said about
us, about men. Gents, in the same way that you are an individual and you wouldn't want anyone
to make an assumption about you based off of what they know of another guy, the same thing
applies to women. And, again, for some of you younger guys out there that have never had
a meaningful relationship, with a woman. Maybe you didn't have a mother that cared for you,
didn't have sisters that looked out for you, didn't have an aunt that was there for you.
I have to say I'm fortunate. I had all of those things. So, I know that women can be great.
Another issue is the one size fits all mentality. Whenever people are giving advice online, they're
not paying attention to your unique situation. And everybody obviously is different. We got
17-year-olds, 70-year-olds, 27-year-old professionals. Whatever your situation is, it's unique. And
you've got to understand that. you need advice or you need guidance that is nuanced. And,
gents, let's talk about the fine line between being persuasive and being manipulative. I
see so many manipulative tactics out there to get the woman in bed to be able to get somebody's
money. Which if it leads to a positive outcome for both parties, that's a good thing. And
which in my book would be classified as influence or persuasion. But, when the outcome is a pomp
and number, whether that's an altcoin, whether that's in a relationship, yeah, where one party
takes advantage of the other, gents, that's manipulation. that's not the path you want
to go down. So, what qualifies me to tell you anything? Well, a little bit about me. I've
been on this earth for 47 years. I grew up in West Texas, went to Greenwood High School outside
of Midland, Texas, picked up my undergrad at Cornell College, joined the United States Marine
Corps, was an officer of Marines for five years. After that, I moved over to Ukraine. I ran
a nonprofit, but really I wanted to be over there because my fiancee now wife was living
over there. I returned to the US, picked up my MBA at the University of Texas, picked up
a job up here in Wisconsin. After that, I was promptly fired, which was a blessing in disguise
because I started my first company, a tailored suit. It was just a bit ahead of its time and
I wasn't the best business guy because I ran that company into a bankruptcy. That being
said, I did learn that, hey, I'm pretty good at creating information. So, I started making
these YouTube videos, I started blogging, and both of those businesses were able to thrive.
And that is what you know now as Real Men Real Style. All that being said, gents, it has not
been a bed of roses. I've been in positions where I couldn't afford rent, where it was
difficult to make payroll, where I was dealing with just personal tragedy. I lost my sister
to suicide. I've lost other friends to suicide. And it's something that, yeah, you deal with
these tragedies, you deal with the ups and downs, but that's life. And that's what I've got to
offer you. This is my take. This is my philosophy. These are the four things that I think every
guy needs to hear. So, first up, you need to learn to think critically. So, there's this
great scene in the movie Starship Troopers when Johnny Rico says, I was wondering what you
would do if you were me. His teacher, Mr. Ratzik, replies, figuring things out for yourself is
the only freedom that anyone really needs. has. Now, the novel itself is a really deep read.
It's impacted science fiction for over 60 years. And I love this quote because even when I heard
it at the time, I was 21, it stuck with me as well. That's profound. Here's the deal, gents.
If you don't learn to think for yourself, other people are going to do the thinking for you
and you're going to find yourself in situations that aren't of your own making. A man that
can think for himself is critical of all information coming his way including information for me.
So, I'm going to be talking about the you should take everything I say with a grain of salt,
everything that one of those online gurus says. You need to critically analyze it and say,
does this really apply to me? Is this information which he's very persuasive, he's a great speaker,
but really does this apply to me in my situation? Because personally, I know somebody that took
Ty Lopez's course which most people will agree is a scam course, but... that he got some value
from and he felt it was worth it. I know people that have been part of pyramid schemes and
have benefited even though the vast majority of people do not. So, how does a man start
to think critically? First up, you got to develop a critical mindset. I highly recommend the
book, Thinking Fast and Slow. That book does a really good job of helping you understand
all the different cognitive biases that we fall into as human beings. If you want something
that's a bit more broad, a bit more academic, I highly recommend it. Check out Critical Thinking,
a concise guide. Another step to cultivating a critical mindset is to journal. And the key
with journaling is that you reflect on what happened throughout the day. I use the High
Performance Journal by Brendan Bruchard. I really like the structure and the questions that it
forces me to ask every day. That being said, Jen, you don't have to spend a whole lot of
money. You can use a spiral notepad. The key here is that you're writing down your thinking
and reflecting on what happened today. You're cultivating that critical mindset. by actually
thinking and asking questions of yourself. And speaking of mindset, let's talk about meditation.
Thirty seconds. Can you meditate for thirty seconds? Can you have a cup of coffee and can
you give gratitude for what you've got in your life? It may not be much, it may be a whole
lot if you actually start listing out your health, you've got your family, your car runs, you're
in a warm house. No one is yelling at you right now because it's maybe 5 a.m. Guys, I'm going
to go ahead and start. There is so much. And, again, it doesn't need to be big. You don't
have to get in a yoga pose, although that would be great if you could give it more time. That's
awesome if you could build up to it. What I'm talking about is just getting started. Now,
the next step to becoming a critical thinker is to practice your logic and argumentive skills.
Now, I have another book that I'm going to recommend here. It's called A Rulebook for Arguments.
What I love about this book is it helps you spot logical fallacies in articles or anytime
you're hearing something so that... you start to actually have fun, you make it a game that
whenever you're hearing something that you agree with or disagree with, you're actually looking
are they making a logical case for this. Of course, I don't want you to lose a friend,
so be careful with this. But, can you be asking them questions that honestly they can't answer
and maybe together you can find the answer or maybe they'll come to a realization that of
course you are right or maybe you'll do this to yourself and come to the realization, I
don't have as strong of an argument as I thought. for believing the way I do. And, don't try
to convince them that you are right. Instead, try to understand why they think they're right.
Now, I'll be straight up, gents, developing a critical mindset takes years. It can take
decades even with careful study. But putting in the time, putting in the effort to sharpen
your own mind is the best investment you could ever make. Next up, let's talk about cultivating
healthy relationships. So, this is one of the biggest issues I have to young men is that
somehow women are the enemy. Gents, believe me, we have enough real enemies out there.
War, greed, hunger. Anyone that's trying to divide us because of sex, because of religion,
because of our beliefs, guys, understand their goal is not to help you. They may think they
are, but they're really just trying to grab your attention. They're trying to get views.
They're trying to use sensationalism to stand out from the crowd. Now, I'm not a fool. Of
course, there are shitty people out there. There are evil women that take advantage of men.
But, as a father of four girls, it was raised by a single mom that had an aunt that stood
up for him and was always there that has a wife that's been with me for over twenty-something
years and sees, you know, I've got a sister-in-law that has stood by her husband for a year and
a half through the war. And, I can tell you that there are some good women out there because...
I seem to be surrounded by them. Many of you guys know I've got a 19-year-old son. I've
got a 16-year-old nephew and a 12-year-old nephew living under my roof right now. And with these
young men, I'm wanting them to see that relationships, it's all about respect. And, of course, that
goes both ways. I tell this to my daughters as well. The relationships with people you
care about shouldn't be about transactions or positions of power. Again, gents, the one word
it comes down to for me is respect. I'm not going to say that I'm not going to is respect.
If you respect and other people show you respect in the relationship, in my experience, I found
that those are the relationships that last, those are the ones that I want to be a part
of and that I look forward to building in the future. Respect applies to friends, it applies
to family, it applies to everybody that you interact with. Show it, give it, and expect
it from others. Have the standard if you're not being shown respect that you can walk away
from the situation. Next up, let's talk about working on your character. Your character is
who you are. Your reputation is the shadow of that character. For me, it's about all the
selves, self-discipline, self-respect, self-improvement, all of these things. And I'm not going to tell
you how to define your character. This is something that every man I think has to work on and focus
on for himself. For me, honor, courage, commitment, those are the core values I picked up in the
Marines and to this day, I still try to live up to them. But, one warning I'll give you
about developing getting back to those self words, it's about your self-improvement. It's
about your self-development, not trying to force change on others. And this is tough because
when you step up your game, you start to expect more from others. And it's good to have standards,
but I would recommend especially to the people that you care about, be gentle, be forgiving,
be understanding, and look at it, your journey is not their journey. For me personally, I'm
not going to be a good person. I'm going to be a good person. I hold myself to a higher
standard than I hold others. Because the reality is a lot of people don't care. They're not
at a point in their lives where they're looking or seeking the self-development. Maybe they're
barely surviving. They are where you were maybe five years ago or where you may be five years
from now. So that's why I try to have empathy and I try to be kind to others realizing maybe
they're not as strong as me at this point. Now, if you are looking for a guru, somebody that
you can trust and you can be sure that they're not going to try to get into your wallet, gents,
my advice here is to learn from the dead. Seriously, biographies are where it's at. And most of
you guys have access to a library, so you can get this information for free or a joint audible.
I listen to audiobooks all the time. But, biographies, unlike self-help books that usually have an
agenda or they're trying to funnel you into something else, Biographies were written usually
at the end of somebody's life. It's great if it was written by them or with the help of
a co-author. But, this is something that you get to learn from somebody's actual life. So,
a few good ones. Endurance, Shackleton's Incredible Voyage by Alfred Lansing. So, if you don't
know the story of Ernest Shackleton, you need to check this thing out. Talk about just a
crazy story. You see the guy failed, but he still succeeded. Next up, we got The Emperor,
The Downfall So, if you don't know the history of Hele Selassie, the emperor of Ethiopia,
this guy led an incredible life and his country has gone through so much and it really gives
you a background on East Africa and the history in the last hundred years in that part of the
world. Next up, check out Rabidranath Tagore, the myriad-minded man. So, Rabidranath was
a Bengali polymath. and he was the first non-European to win the Nobel Prize for Literature. Next
up, we've got narrative of the life of Frederick Douglass, an American slave. And right with
that, we've got team of rivals, the political genius of Abraham Lincoln. So, I'm linking
these two guys together because whenever Abraham Lincoln was first giving, I believe it was
his most famous speech, he actually wanted one person's opinion on it and that was Frederick
Douglass. So, these two guys intertwined just a very interesting time in American history.
And, of course, we've got Meditations by Marcus Aurelius, the Roman emperor who this was his
personal writings. Never meant for the public to see, but you get to read his inner frustrations
and his thoughts. The most powerful man in the world and what he truly thought. It's amazing
and it's so relatable I think for any person. Now, gents, I know a lot of you guys read biographies,
so let me know in the comments below what your favorite one is. And, gents, what video to
watch next? Well, guys, I've got you covered right here. Yes. click on the video right here.
You will magically go to the next one. And, come on, tired of holding this up? Click, go
to the next video. Oh, yeah. Guys, see you in the next video. Take care.