It is difficult accepting it in the first place,
but once you do accept it
and look for solutions, there is still a life...
You don't have to sit in the house and do nothing.
The worst time for me
was when the consultant cardiologist at the hospital...
..said to me that there was nothing they could do for me.
I said to him, "So, will I be getting a pacemaker now?"
They said, "No. That wouldn't be suitable for your condition."
I felt really distraught that there were all these things available
that I'd heard about,
but none of them were applicable to my heart condition,
because I have got a broken heart.
When I went to see Martin the first time,
I was told he was a heart failure nurse.
He said, "We think of every day as it comes
"and we always have something to look forward to."
So I told him about my grandson getting married this year,
so it was, "Well, we'll look forward to the wedding.
"All sorts of exciting things are going to happen."
And I was thinking, "I've got to get better
"because I need to get some new clothes
"and I've got to make the journey to York and find somewhere to stay."
It was an incentive every day to try and get a little bit better.
If I want to do something and I think I can't possibly do it,
Martin has always come up with a solution for me.
One thing she wanted to do was swim.
That is quite a task for someone with heart failure,
so we had lots of intermediate goals to help her achieve that,
including for the first time, just getting in the water
and walking about with the water at no more than waist height,
and we progressed that from there.
And it is only just recently after quite a few months
that we've actually got her swimming properly.
Because I need to stop upright in the water,
because my lungs are half full of fluid,
Martin suggested that I had a float around me
which would keep me upright, and I would swim like a seahorse.
So I am trying to swim like a seahorse!
I got Rheumatoid arthritis in my feet -
my legs were getting so stiff because I couldn't walk...
..and I felt that I was going to be house bound
if I didn't get back to the swimming pool.
I've done all the hard work now, and I am just going to relax.
This is the time when I feel as if I could go to sleep...
..because it is so relaxing.
It is wonderful, and when I come out, I feel that I walk a lot better.
I met Eric when we were 17 years old,
so we have been married 57 years.
Eric keeps me going.
If I am down, it's a case of, "You can do it. You always do it.
"I am sure you can do it."
That sort of thing.
And... I think...
I don't know what I'd do without him, really.
I think when you've been married as long as we have,
you just put yourself out
to make life as comfortable and as happy as possible.
We try and keep on the move if we can,
but overall, we tend to go out
or we have some activity every day,
even if it's only going to the supermarket.
It's always great when a patient feels satisfied in themselves.
And of course it motivates me in the way that I want to help patients
to get them to understand that sometimes looking at small goals,
or even modifying what we want to do
means we can achieve meaningful things in daily life,
rather than wondering what's happened to our life.
You see why I grow sweet peas off the tree now -
I don't have to bend down!
And with Edith, she liked to work in the kitchen doing baking,
but she found she got dizzy after quite a time,
and she was giving up cooking.
So we arranged for her to have a perching stool
so that she could stand for some of the time
and then sit and continue for some of the time.
That's allowed her to carry on and enjoy her baking.
I have hypertension, and Martin has altered my medication.
He has found different medication to try,
and my blood pressure has come down.
The pharmaceutical business is moving at such a rate,
there are new drugs coming in, and so on...
Martin he keeps us up to date.
He probably keeps the GPs up to date, as well,
with the modern medicines.
It's been quite exciting to go back
and do things that I thought I would never do again.
You're never going to get any better sitting at home thinking about it.
You need to get out and join groups,
and do some activities as much as you can.
Enjoy life while it's here.