- Have you gotten too comfortable in a relationship?
Have you noticed that your relationship
is not as good as it used to be?
We're going to be talking about this in today's video.
Hi ladies, my name is Ieva,
and I am one of Greta's high value women coaches.
Today, we're going to be talking about five reasons
why you should not be too comfortable with your guy.
Before we jump into today's video,
make sure you take the self-awareness test
to find out if you're a woman of high value
or a woman of low value,
and you can find that test down below
in the description section.
Also, have a look at Greta's online store
where you can get your hands
on beautiful T-shirts and hoodies.
You can find the link to her online store
down below in the description section also.
If you haven't heard yet,
Greta has launched her brand new book
which is called "Devoted Relationships".
It's an ebook where you can learn
how to have high value relationships.
Go ahead and get your hands on this ebook.
You can find the link to that
on Greta's website as well down below
in the description section.
Without further ado, let's jump into the first reason
why you should not get too comfortable with your guy.
The number one reason is he needs to have the feeling
that he has to pursue you.
A guy will feel very comfortable with you
if he feels like he has you at the palm of his hand.
A guy gets that feeling
when you give him too much attention,
validation, and affection.
When you overgive,
he will become too comfortable in the relationship.
When a guy is too comfortable in a relationship,
he will not pursue you more.
He will not make the effort in the relationship anymore,
because he's comfortable.
He will see that you simply settle for less affection
from his side.
Because women tend to overgive so much,
because they love the guy
and want to show the guy that they love them,
it can get very tricky.
This problem tends to occur often,
because women overgive love and affection a lot of the time.
You have to understand as a woman
that the things you want in your relationship
and the way that you want to be treated
is not necessarily the same thing
that he wants in a relationship
or that he wants to be treated the same way.
For example, if you want to be cuddled
and loved all the time and be told that you are so loved,
it's not necessarily what he wants to hear from you as well,
because it is pursuing,
and that should be done from his side.
The second reason is feeling secure or feeling comfortable.
There is a big difference
between feeling secure in a relationship
or feeling comfortable in a relationship.
It's great when you feel secure in your relationship,
and everything is going smoothly and at the right pace,
and developing within itself over time
and is moving towards something bigger
like marriage or children.
But being comfortable in a relationship
can sometimes not always be good.
Being comfortable to a certain degree
in a relationship is totally fine, so don't get me wrong,
but when you are too comfortable
by not taking care of yourself,
or not being that interested in your relationship anymore,
that is when the relationship starts to sink.
That's when the relationship Titanic starts to sink.
Whatever you do,
do not start becoming more and more vulnerable
just because you are comfortable in your relationship.
Doing so will not benefit the relationship.
If anything, it's going to make it worse.
Don't start thinking,
"Okay, I'm really comfortable in my relationship now
and I feel secure,
so it's okay for me to be low value again."
Like maybe you were in the past.
If you have been high value in your relationship,
and everything is going fine,
it's going fine and it's going well,
because you are high value.
So don't start pursuing him,
or chasing him, or acting low value,
and don't think that it's okay to do so because it's not.
Number three is don't overgive.
Okay, this might be hard for women sometimes,
because women are so affectionate and caring,
but it is a must that you do not overgive
in your relationship.
If you overgive towards him,
he will simply get too comfortable,
and that is what he is going to be expecting
in the future as well.
And this is a very, very important point.
Instead, be more on the receptive side
and see how things go.
He should, of course,
be the one that initiates most of the time for sure.
When you overgive, you also set a standard
for what you are going to give him,
especially if you do it more than once.
And he might start getting too comfortable,
and actually complain if you don't do something.
So if you see yourself overgiving,
stop doing it immediately,
because it's literally going to set a standard,
and he's going to get used to it very, very quickly,
and expect it from you all the time in the future,
and you do not want to do that,
because it will turn into fights and complaints later on
if you stop overgiving like you did before.
And when a woman overgives,
she's going to feel used and she's not going to feel good,
especially if it's not going to give her
more affection and love,
and overgiving does not give you more affection and love
when it comes to men.
If you haven't subscribed yet,
make sure you subscribe
to Greta's YouTube channel down below,
and click the bell button to be notified
whenever she uploads a brand new video.
Tip number four or reason number four
is being too comfortable in your relationship
does not actually lead to relationship development.
I do not suggest getting too comfortable in a relationship.
Of course, you want to feel secure,
but being comfortable and secure
are two different pairs of shoes.
Comfortable is not necessarily a good thing.
A lot of the time, women fall into the trap
of being comfortable in a relationship,
and after a while,
starts seeing that things are not developing
in the direction that they presume or assume it to go in.
For example, they don't really see a proposal
just around the corner,
and it is because the relationship
has gotten too comfortable.
And also the relationship has potentially
become simply too predictable, because it is so comfortable.
To spice things up and not make things so comfortable
or predictable in your relationship,
take up hobbies for yourself that you really enjoy doing,
and stop pursuing him if you are doing so.
That is very important,
and it's also a simple way
of how to spice your relationship up,
and get it out of that comfort zone
that you don't want it to be into,
because as I said,
being secure and comfortable in a relationship
are two different things.
You don't want the relationship to become comfortable, okay?
You want it to become secure and develop.
My tip or reason number five
is to keep an eye out for your relationship,
but you have to live your life
outside of your relationship also.
You should always keep an eye out
on how your relationship is going,
but it should not be the only thing
that you're thinking about during your day to day life
or not the one thing
that you consume yourself with completely.
You should also definitely be building a life for yourself,
not only with your job, okay,
and not only with your career,
but also with your friends, with your hobbies,
and with taking care of yourself.
Your life does not depend on a relationship,
and your value does not depend on a relationship.
You should not feel like your relationship
is the best thing in your life right now.
If you feel that way,
you have to build things around your relationship,
so that you keep a balance of all things in your life,
and when you keep that balance
of friends, and hobbies, and work, career, family,
when all of that and your relationship is balanced,
you will not be putting him on a pedestal,
because he's not going to be the best thing in your life,
because everything should be balanced.
And that's why we so often talk about hobbies
or having hobbies in a relationship,
or focusing on your job
and making sure that you have a job that you enjoy,
and focusing on other things in life to keep a balance.
That is what's going to also balance out your relationship.
If you like this video, give me a thumbs up,
and if you haven't subscribed yet,
make sure you do that right now,
and let me know in the comment section down below
what you liked most about this video.
I always read through the comment section,
so I'd love to know.
If you haven't yet, then make sure you join
Greta's free High Value Women's School.
It's a free Facebook group
where you learn how to bring out the best in your man.
You can find the link to that down below
in the description section,
and if you would like to know
how to get him to fall for you via text,
what games men play on women and how to handle them,
how to get your ex back, how to set boundaries,
or maybe you have a hobby
that you want to turn into an online business,
Greta has all of these videos up for sale on her website,
so go ahead and check that out.
The link to that is down below
in the description section also.
Go ahead and check out Greta's High Value Woman course
where you learn to be high value from A to Zed.
It's made up of five modules and two big bonuses.
You don't want to miss out on it.
You can learn a bunch.
Go ahead and check that out.
That's down below in the description section also.
If you would like to be coached by Greta, me,
or any member of Greta's team,
we would absolutely love to help you out.
You can book a coaching session with us on Greta's website,
and that's down below in the description section.
Go ahead and have a look.
We'd love to help you out.
Also, go ahead and check out Greta's Instagram,
which is ladies_relationship_coach.
She posts a lot of really cool content on there.
Thank you so much for watching.
I wish you a beautiful week.
I hope this video helped you out,
and I cannot wait to see you next time.
Bye.