In Lewis Carroll’s classic book, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, the Caterpillar
started his conversation with Alice with a question: “Who are you?”
To which she admitted, “I — I hardly know, sir, just at present — at least I know who
I WAS when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since
then.” Kudos to Alice for even trying to answer that
question. We are many people, often thinking and behaving differently in many differing
situations. And, who we think we are may be completely different than how other people
view us. Who we think we are is what is usually referred
to as our “self-concept,” which also goes by different terms such as “self-construction,”
“self-identity,” “self-perspective,” “self-structure,” and “self-image”
Essentially, it is the answer you have to the Caterpillar’s question: “Who are you?”
It’s the collection of beliefs that you have about yourself.
Yes, I used the word “different” many times, so I’ll use it again: What is the
difference between “self-concept” and “self-esteem”?
That’s what this video will focus on: What “self-concept” is
What “self-esteem” is and how it differs from the “self-concept.”
Both humanist psychologists Carl Rogers and Abraham Maslow were involved in describing
the self-concept which, as I said earlier, is the view you have of yourself. Think of
it as a nonjudgmental description of yourself. While it can change over time, it’s a relatively
stable perception. It can refer to physical attributes, social
roles, personal traits, and existential views which are much more abstract.
For example, Physically, I’m short, overweight, female—Wait:
That should be gray hair these days! In terms of social roles, I am a professor,
a daughter, a friend, colleague….—Again, the hair should be gray in this picture.
In terms of personal traits, I consider myself intelligent, altruistic, cheerful, a good
cook, a multi-tasker… And, existentially, I view myself as a product
of my surroundings and an integral part of the world around us.
Now, admittedly, I am not always a good cook, but I am for the most part. And, while I have
not been a professor my entire life, I think of myself as a professor now and probably
will even after I am no longer teaching—probably considering myself as a “retired professor.”
Another way to think of the Self-Concept is that it is an “enduring sense of who we
are.” Let me use the Spanish verb, “to be,”
as an example to clarify the self-concept. In English, we would use the words, “I am,”
“she is” and “they are”—all meaning “to be.” But, unlike English. there are
actually two different Spanish versions of this verb: ser and estar.
For our purposes, ser relates to the self-concept: I am (and will, for the foreseeable future
be) a daughter. Estar is usually used to express emotion: I am happy, sad, etc. (Yes, I know
it also means location, etc., but that’s not where I’m going with this.)
But, what about those of us who are described as “perpetually” happy, grumpy, frustrated,
etc.? In that case, ser would be the verb used, with estar used to describe a deviation
from the norm. She is sad (using estar) because she is normally happy (using ser).
Your self-concept, then, is your ser: “Yo soy una hija” (“I am a daughter”) or
“Yo soy alegre” (“I am cheerful, happy, etc.”).
That brings us to Self-Esteem, sometimes called “self-worth.”
No, our self-esteem is not the estar version of “to be.”
Instead, our self-esteem moves beyond just reporting the information to conveying how
we "feel" about these things. Technically, it is an evaluation—a judgment—of who
we are, referring to how much we like, accept, or approve of ourselves. We can often "hear"
how you feel about yourself through the way you enhance, clarify, or diminish the labels
you use to describe yourself. For example, I said I was a professor. How
do I feel about that? Perhaps I’m proud to be a professor—it enhances my self-esteem.
Or, perhaps I view a professor as “less than”—maybe I compare my occupation with
those of my friends and family who might be engineers, famous actors, politicians, and
so on, and have an unfavorable view of my profession.
(For the record, I feel good about being a professor.)
Another example I used was that I am overweight. I constantly compare myself to others--and
I don’t feel good about this aspect of myself, which negatively affects my self-esteem. You
can probably hear that negativity in the way I said that word: “overweight.” The word
itself is a description; my tone of voice communicates my feelings about being overweight.
Earlier I mentioned Abraham Maslow: If you are familiar with Maslow’s Hierarchy of
Needs, you’ll recall that even he addressed the importance of feeling good about ourselves
when he placed Esteem needs near the very top of his hierarchy.
If you’re having difficulty with the difference between self-concept and self-esteem, you’re
not alone. Your self-concept influences your self-esteem, and vice versa.
In fact, psychologist Carl Rogers included self-esteem as one of the three components
of the self-concept, sometimes called Personality Theory) when he defined it as a combination
of our self-image (our personal view of who we are), our ideal self (who we wish we really
were), and our self-esteem or self-worth (how much value we place on ourselves). “See?”
you might be saying, “Self-esteem is right in Roger’s description of the self-concept.”
True, but I (and others) would argue that the self-concept, as we are talking about
it, refers to that first component of self-image: our personal view of who we are.
Rogers also introduced the concept of “congruence,” relating to the overlap of the self-image
and the ideal self. The closer our ideal self is to our self-image, the more “congruence”
we experience. The more congruence, the greater our sense of self-esteem (we feel good about
ourselves and our lives). Little to no overlap between our self-image
and our ideal self means we are in an “incongruent” state—our self-image and ideal self differ
significantly, contributing to low self-esteem. And, according to several medical studies,
low self-esteem can negatively affect your health as well as your personal and work relationships.
Now that you have a better idea of both the self-concept and self-esteem, you are probably
wondering how to improve your self-esteem. While that’s beyond the scope of this video,
suffice it to say that the process involves a lot of introspection and realistic thinking.
To repeat the Caterpillar’s question: “Who are you?”
Keep in mind that no one really knows who someone truly is. No matter how accurate you
think your self-concept is, I guarantee that you are off in at least one aspect: your physical
appearance. Don’t believe me? Think of your reaction
when you see a photograph of yourself: You just don’t look right. That’s because,
not only does the camera add weight—ugh!, that can affect your self-esteem—but you
see your image in reverse. You’re used to seeing yourself in a mirror, with your hair
parted on, say, the left. But others look at you with your hair part on the right.
And, if your view of your physical self is erroneous, the other parts of your self-concept
may be as well. Yep, that deserves some introspection and
realistic thinking!