- I see the portion of the computer screen that is where the ellipsis dots are appearing
and it's visually too long, wrongly long.
Later I discover that I have typed four dots instead of three.
Simultaneously, I am aware of the physicality of the tapping
of my right hand as it creates these dots. I can say retrospectively that it is my third
finger typing, but at the time it is my hand or fingers moving.
There is also, perhaps, some sense of the backness of the dots.
- I'm sitting at my desk, I have an itch on the right side of the bridge of my nose
and I'm scratching at it with my right index finger.
I'm aware that the scratching feels good and I'm aware that I'm looking up.
It's a feeling in my eyes, rather than what I'm seeing as I do so.
I'm aware that my left arm is outstretched holding my phone, I'm aware that I'm amused
by something that I've been reading on the phone, but that something us no longer present,
even though the amusement continues.
It's a warm, ripply feeling within my chest, which is subsiding.
I feel myself becoming collected.
A bodily coming-together of my upturned eyes, my scratching hand, and my outstretched left arm.
Rather like a refolding of body parts that has become unfolded.
- I was sighing. Nicely I experienced the sigh.
I heard the sigh in two ways, as the external sound and also,
seperately, but with about equal intensity as the sound I hear somehow inside
my head, like it comes to my ears without going outside my mouth.
I also feel the motion, pressure in my chest,
secondarily, I feel my middle finger on the mouse scroll button,
feel the rubber of the button on my finger and see the window move on the screen.
I did not see any details of the screen scrolling but it feels like it is attached to the hand movement.
- I'm planning a trip for a colleague, I innerly say to myself,
60% speaking, 40% hearing.
Barnet... that's with an elongated, slow downed pace,
so it's Baaaaarnet.
This speaking seems to be in my forehead, between my eyes. Baaaaaarnet.
At the same time I'm also thinking my way through this travel problem,
and thoughts begin whirling around my head, which are related to: 'where is Barnet?'
There's also a physical aspect, which is both in my forehead and a clenching in my torso.
- I am innerly saying and hearing myself say: "Yeah, tree!"
I innerly see a section of a tree trunk
rather like a museum display or a scientific representation, more or less like a cut-away.
It's a couple of feet of tree trunk on it's side and I see into it,
but I don't know whether it's cut away or I just see into it.
I see the stripes of the woodgrain in a variety
of different woody colours, brown, tan etc. in a swirl around a knot-like growth pattern.
I see a foreign object, a wire and a metallic object, with the tree having grown around it,
like the object had been there for a long time and the tree was adjusting itself to it
I see this clearly and in color. This is a metaphor.
I've been thinking about how the self takes on new characteristics,
and that seeing is something of an answer to how that happens.