Has anyone ever called you a workaholic? Maybe you're married or dating one or
you have memories of a parent being one? It's a term many throw around casually,
even jokingly. Usually, we use it to describe someone who just can't seem to
stop working. Sometimes we even praise workaholics, since hard work is valued in
our culture, and we live in a climate where how much you make matters.
However, workaholism is actually a costly behavior trade. While it's not considered
a mental disorder in the field of psychology, the workaholic has a
psychological addiction to work and, like any addiction, it can damage
relationships and your health. A workaholic is not someone who has long
hours or works multiple jobs. It's someone who behaves like an addict when
they aren't working. They are restless irritable or even depressed. So how does
this addiction get started? There are many reasons someone may develop a work addiction.
Here's four common ones. They may be having trouble at home and use
work as an avoidance. For example, a struggling marriage may make them feel
unappreciated or incompetent; therefore, they use work to avoid these feelings
and recover their self-worth. The workaholic may have an unreasonable
desire for power - overseeing and dominating employees may give an
inflated feeling of importance and value. A third reason is a compulsive need to
structure time or complete tasks. These types of workaholics often have trouble
relaxing and many report feeling uncomfortable or guilty on vacations.
Every moment must be filled with productivity. Work makes the person feel
comfortable and valued. Finally, a workaholic may use work
to fill an emptiness within themselves. This is especially true for those who
lack a spiritual component in their lives.
These workaholics often avoid questioning whether their lives have a
deeper meaning by filling their time with work. So now that you understand
why someone might develop this addiction, let's talk about the drawbacks and
damage of a work addiction. The most obvious one is that any addiction is
dangerous when you obtain the majority of your emotional gratification from it.
If a workaholic loses their job or become severely injured, recovery will be
extremely challenging, and they're more prone to depression. Another drawback is
the damage to relationships. Workaholics who use work to avoid marriage
problems will only exacerbate the problem, and it can lead to divorce.
Many workaholics also miss out on forming a relationship with their children
which harms both parent and child. Finally, there are costs to your health.
Research has found that many workaholics develop something called
early death or General Adaptation Syndrome. This is a syndrome created by
consistent levels of high stress. While the person may seem to be coping well
with the work, they eventually fall into the last stage - exhaustion. In this stage,
the person exhibits severe health conditions, such as ulcers, infections,
cancer, heart disease, and extreme fatigue, which can cause early death/
If you think you might be addicted to work, how do you recover? First of all, you need
to realize that you need to slow down. A constant obsession for achievement is
bad for your health. Do whatever you need to do to stop the
glorification of busyness. I personally recommend exercising to get rid of the
nervous energy or meditation and reflection. Reflect on
your need to work. Do you have an unhealthy desire for power? Do you feel
inadequate in your personal life? Do you feel unworthy unless you work?
A therapist can help you sort through these feelings. Another recommendation is
to limit projects and commitments. Learn how to say no when you're too busy. Are
you taking on extra tasks to please others? Check out my video on breaking
the cycle of people-pleasing. Finally, learn how to enjoy passive experiences.
Many workaholics only find joy when they're doing something like organizing
a closet, writing a book, or working in the garden. Instead, I encourage you to
enjoy something you don't actively contribute to. Enjoy a sunset, listen to
soothing music, watch your child play, or pet your cat. Take time to appreciate the
beautiful world you live in! Your work will still be there when you're done.
Remember, change your reaction, change your world!