my wife told me that she thinks our 11-year old daughter is being bullied
emotionally by some girls at school as I drove into work I wondered if jiu-jitsu
would give her some tools to help her deal with emotional stress and or
bullying that might be taking place I think we all know the answer that daca
will give to this question absolutely jiu-jitsu will help 11 years old is a
perfect age for getting in there and you will learn to she will learn to defend
herself for real in physical confrontations which will give for real
confrontation which will give her confidence because let's face it
emotional and verbal bullying is absolutely backed up by a either clear
message of possible violence or a subliminal message of possible violence
right I mean a big group a girl that's getting picked on the the the underlying
message is there the implied message is there that it could go physical if it
had to and when that gets removed because the the daughter knows how to
now fight and defend herself that starts to impact these emotional
bullies as well so yes absolutely get her training I would throw some
boxing in there too just because that is a pretty empowering thing you punch in
something that feels good and you know what while we're at it let's get some
working out going on right get a pull-up bar get away the warrior kid no kidding
yeah absolutely get her way of the warrior kid don't be be her too much
yeah you got to be careful that cuz she's your daughter and you say home you
know it's so horrible and these girls are picking at you don't don't do that
because guess what she's gonna be dealing with a sore whole life you're
gonna be get there's always bullies in every environment in the in school
environment and the work environment in everywhere there's bullies and she's
gonna have to deal with him so don't don't baby her where she thinks that
you're the one that's gonna save her from it and I also think she should know
that everyone gets bullied mm-hmm I got asked that when way the warrior kid came
out someone said did you get bullied and they think of course I would never get
bullied because I'm a big dude well guess what when I was nine years old I
was a scrawny little nine year old kid and every buddy that was 11 was bigger
than me and stronger than me and then when I was 11 everyone that was
13 was bigger than me than stronger than me and when I was 14 everyone that was
16 was bigger than me and stronger than me so you no matter who you are as a kid
there's always somebody that the bigger and stronger than you that's gonna bully
you if they're a jerk so I think she should understand that she's getting
bullied right now but that's that happens to people and people get over it
and get through it and I do think you have to be when you say that you can't
leave the imprint you can't overwhelm her and say everyone gets bullied and
you can always get bullied in the office to overwhelm her I think that's just
like there's a there's a lot did you ever see a movie their professional
which was the first guy oh yeah yeah Annie on yeah there's a great scene in
that movie where the girl is there's like crazy fight going on between her
parents in the apartment they're yelling at each other the screaming is slapping
people the domestic violence is going on and she comes out and she's sitting in
the hallway and she's crying and the assassin guy kind of walks up the stairs
and and she looks and he looks at her and she looks at him and and she says
his life always like this or does it get better when you get older and he looks
at her and says always like this yeah so you got to be careful that that's not
the message that you're sending now there's some reality to that statement
like yeah I guess what life is always gonna be hard and you do want to give
your kids enough exposure to the hard thing so that they're not weak yeah and
they don't they don't go into panic mode when something tough enters their world
so that's why things like jiu-jitsu when working out are good and exposing them
and letting them experience some hard things but again you just don't want to
overwhelm her and that's that and by the way you might as well start training in
jiu-jitsu too there we can't leave mom in there - yeah now
you got a excuse to get down in that gym jiu-jitsu want and I know you that you
don't change your jitters because if you did you wouldn't be asking this question
you've been getting getting her training yeah you make it that happen so you
emotionally bullied right so this is interesting she's in the new warrior kid
book the bully there's a bully in there but he's not a bully like Kenny
Williamson who's a big strong bully he's a bully that's an emotional bully kind
of is d and every time there seems like there's gonna be a confrontation he
finds a way to weasel out of it yeah you know so he'll harass people but they
don't ask people he knows perfectly how to push the buttons that's what the
Mark's dealing with this kid named Nathan James Nathan James causes
problems yeah there's some layers of that name for sure that I saw this this
makes a lot of sense to me because I have a daughter four and a half by the
way it goes to pre-k it's like a preschool pre-k is that digit to school
she goes no no bruh anyway so she's the instructor she told me one day she said
that her friends I'm not gonna say their name doesn't matter um she said this
friend told me that she's not my friend she's only this other girls from that's
emotional that's emotional bullying right there right for the four and a
half year old version yeah I guess so it gets way worse at 11 by the way and then
probably way we're set yeah fifteen sixteen it's just my assumption so what
I told her not to say this is the right answer but maybe is yeah I'm gonna think
about so my daughter does jiu-jitsu has done jiu-jitsu double leg choke well I
like it well that's what you wanna say yeah you
smashed it and she's bigger to your than then everyone you know so she's gonna
weigh only No all right so what was your word you telling my daughter's trained
to be a nice rakia so I always have this underlying thing no matter if someone
B's mean to you that doesn't mean you be mean to them that makes you a mean
person I said mean people we'll be mean to other people nice
people tend to not be mean to other people right that's really basic stuff
fundamental but she's four yeah um so you just keep reminding her so so I told
her hey look if she doesn't want to be your friend then she's not your friend
and that's okay does that mean you be mean to her no but at the end of the day
Sheena I said are you stronger than her and she said yeah I said are you smarter
than her she said yeah I don't know she is risen here's the thing it's the self
empowering thing just like how you said where she knows you just do she's
smarter she's stronger she can do more pull-ups she can do more burpees and
stuff like that all this stuff it starts to form in her head hopefully who the
goal yeah hopefully it'll form in her head that if they don't want to be my
friend that's okay that's no loss to me maybe if someone who is strong like me
smart like me and whatever like me didn't want to make okay maybe that's
something but this isn't the case you know it's kind of that idea that's good
advice I think it the the thing of just saying oh yeah that's okay not
everyone's gonna want to be your friend that's okay yeah and some people are
gonna like you and some people aren't gonna like you that's okay you just be
nice to everyone that's fine yeah I gotta ask that question but when we did
the one warrior kid podcast a bunch of people asked oh my I feel like people
don't want to hang around with me and I was yeah that's okay yeah that's okay
you don't need to hang around with people all the time I don't I don't like
even like hanging around with people I didn't say next I don't social person
like me but yeah that makes it in that thing I think you just said it where
because my daughter always asks you know did people not want to be your friend or
what she'd like bump her head real hard she like did you used to bump your head
when you were little you know she always wants to know like am I alone in this
whole whole deal and man it seems like it really helps what I say no I used to
do all the time I sure like my scars and stuff like that and she'll be like oh
and you could tell she feels better about it that's pretty cool
it's weird I think that would help with a bullying thing and and it's good your
daughter's smart and so she has the capability of formulating that question
I bet a lot of key this might not be able to even say hey
did you bump your head to wear as a parent if you just recognize that they
probably feel alone and so if you say oh I know you bump your head I used to bump
my head too one time look I got a scar in my head it happened to me too so they
don't make your kids beg for a partner in the world give it to him yeah follow
the echo Charlie parenting and that makes sense too now that I'm thinking of
because the Kievan as an adult okay so you got a kid and they're like hey did
you I don't know did you bump your head like this and get blood on your head or
whatever when you're little and you're like you're like yeah and if you add
this and this is how I dealt with it right because a lot of times like you
give them a little path yes exactly right so you you got you know you got
this poor little kid that bumped her head and it's like dang I don't even
I've never felt this before there's a lot of paint there's blood oh that's
scary I don't know really how to deal with it right so of course you go to
your dad and then your dad's like yeah hey yeah I've done it this is how I did
it this is how I dealt with it and she's like okay maybe I can deal with it and
even adult cuz adults we do that too you know like dang I'm getting I don't know
audited yeah you nodded it whose first time whatever chuckle hey you know or
you know your friend or whatever is like hey I got I did it and there's why you
cares the back this is like how you deal with it all this sudden boom you feel
better about it indeed and we're empowered and that's on top of the
jujitsu if I got audited out of the way I don't know dude you to the knot by the
way yeah yeah yuck