You'd be hard-pressed to find the "reality" in most modern reality television shows, but
one of the worst offenders may be the Discovery Channel hit "Moonshiners" — partly because
its goings-ons are less "dirty money" and more squeaky clean.
Making moonshine remains illegal in the United States — so how can the stars of "Moonshiners"
break the law on national TV and stay out of jail?
Well, according to local law enforcement, it's because "Moonshiners" is about as real
as "Teen Wolf."
“AHHH!”
An exasperated Alcoholic Beverage Control spokeswoman informed the Associated Press
that the show only features dramatizations of moonshining, adding,
"If illegal activity was actually taking place, the Virginia ABC Bureau of Law Enforcement
would have taken action."
Doubtless, the bureau will eventually take another look at the show, just as soon as
they stop those pesky Duke boys from terrorizing Hazzard County.
“Yee haw!”
"Moonshiners" is produced by reality TV behemoth Magilla Entertainment, which also makes shows
like "America's Worst Tattoos," "Submissive Wives' Guide to Marriage," and "Militia Rising."
Their finest work is unquestionably "King of Thrones," a show that can only be described
as "'Pimp My Ride' for toilets."
"You've got rear bidet, front bidet, butt dryer.
You also have full music on here.
Deodorize feature."
Unfortunately, Magilla's shows have been repeatedly accused of misleading viewers.
For example, an episode of "Lakefront Bargain Hunt" depicts an interior decorator named
Robin Corbeil choosing between three different houses.
In reality, Corbeil bought the "winning" home almost two years before the show taped.
The show "Southie Rules" was widely panned for being obviously scripted, while the less
said about "Long Island Medium," the better.
“Wow, you can see into the… present.”
In other words, Magilla may not be the gold standard for keeping the "reality" in reality
TV, or even the cubic zirconium standard.
“It’s a made up tale.”
The first season of "Moonshiners" featured special agent Jesse Tate of the Virginia Alcohol
Beverage Control Bureau, although attentive viewers noted that he never interacted with
the moonshiners, or gave any indication he was aware of that aspect of the show.
Sure enough, the furious bureau later claimed the producers had lied about the kind of program
they were making.
In a statement, the bureau insisted,
"Virginia ABC agreed to participate in an informative piece that documents the history
of moonshine and moonshine investigations in Virginia.
Virginia ABC did not participate nor was aware of the false depiction of moonshine manufacturing,
distribution, and/or transportation in the filming, and would not have participated in
the 'documentary' had it known of this portrayal."
Jesse Tate, for obvious reasons, did not reappear in season 2.
"I don't think your manager would appreciate...."
"I don't appreciate your ruse, ma’am."
"My what?"
"Your ruse.
Your cunning attempt to trick me."
When it comes to depicting real crimes, reality show producers have to walk a fine line.
“Are you sure it’s legal?”
“Of course it’s legal!”
Under U.S. law, witnesses to a crime aren't actually obligated to stop it from happening.
For example, on A&E's reality show "Intervention," a camera crew followed a visibly intoxicated
woman as she climbed into her car and tried to drive away.
Even if she had hit someone, A&E wouldn't have been responsible, since its crew were
merely observers and did not prompt the woman to drive drunk.
“Well well well… if it isn’t the big shot lawyer man!”
However, if a show deliberately puts people at risk, then it could be liable to legal
action.
One man settled out of court after he was hit in the face with a shoe during a fight
on "The Real Housewives of New Jersey."
His lawyer claimed that the fight was staged, and that the producers should have taken precautions
to ensure bystanders weren't maimed by flying stilettos.
"Big Brother" also had to settle a lawsuit after accepting a housemate with a history
of assault, who proceeded to threaten another contestant at knifepoint.
Because the stars of "Moonshiners" are paid to appear on the show, the producers would
almost certainly be liable if anyone was injured from drinking illegal alcohol produced for
the show.
Since sheer insurance costs haven't shut down production, it seems likely that no actual
moonshine is being sold on the Discovery Channel's dime.
Although it's illegal to distill spirits in the U.S. without state and federal permits,
it's not like those permits are impossible to get.
With the publicity from the show, it would be super-easy for the show's stars to secure
backing and go legit.
This is exactly what cast member Tim Smith did, partnering with the Prost Beverage Company
to market "Climax" brand moonshine in stores nationwide.
"You can have the pretty bottle, and you can have my pretty face on it, but it's all about
what's inside."
In other words, even if the show does feature real moonshining, it's not because the cast
members are desperate criminals with no other options.
They're just deliberately choosing not to get the correct permits for the sake of the
show.
Hopefully, more reality shows embrace this model, since "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition"
would definitely be more interesting if all the work was done at night, with no planning
permission.
"Yeah, I've made all kinds of liquor in my time.
I've made the fighting kind, the loving kind, the crying kind…"
The show does feature unquestionably real footage of moonshine being produced by legendary
bootlegger "Popcorn" Sutton.
However, this footage wasn't filmed for the show.
In fact, Sutton sadly took his own life in 2009, two years before "Moonshiners" first
aired.
Before he died, he was the subject of the acclaimed documentary "This is the Last Dam
Run of Likker I'll Ever Make."
The producers merely bought the rights to the movie and used the footage in the first
season of their show.
At the time of his death, Sutton was awaiting trial for, among other crimes, illegally distilling
spirits, a charge notably avoided by the stars of the show, who we viewers are expected to
believe are doing the exact same thing.
When asked how they get away with breaking the law on national TV, the stars of "Moonshiners"
usually have a simple answer: Nobody can prove they're actually doing that.
Tim Smith told BourbonBlog that it's not enough to see someone making something that looks
like moonshine.
Instead, "physical samples of the product you're producing have to be taken and analyzed."
Meanwhile, Josh Owens told Motorcycle USA that:
"I'm not in jail because it's not evidence, for one, that I'm on TV making moonshine.
And for two, I could be doing anything, it could be just water."
Either way, Owens argues that the cops, quote, "got a lot bigger fish to fry than somebody
just making a little bit of something to sip on," which does kind of undercut the show's
"daring outlaws" premise.
When Magilla Entertainment started working on the show in 2010, executives thought that
focusing on illicit moonshiners would be legally risky, probably because, well…
it is.
Instead, they planned to feature licensed moonshiners going legit.
Unfortunately, that turned out to be incredibly boring.
As producer Matt Ostrom told author Jamie Joyce,
"A legal distillery is not the most compelling thing.
It's not like people on boats hunting alligators or fighting giant seas.
It's literally: Water boils."
As a result, Magilla went back to the outlaw concept.
Although the producers insist that the finished show does depict illegal moonshining, their
legal worries presumably didn't just vanish, suggesting that the "criminal activity" might
not be all that it appears.
Ultimately, the doubt may be half the fun.
Maybe it's real, and probably it's not — either way, it's definitely entertaining.
"How are we going to explain that to the police?
We're out here with cotton candy."
"You got moonshine and you got cotton candy?
Did you go rob the street fair?"