Jake Paul and Erika Costell just broke up and in this video we're going to be
talking about fake relationships unrealistic expectations and how they're
affecting your mental health what is up everybody this is Chris from the rewired
soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution and if you're new
to my channel my channel is all about mental health so no I am NOT a drama
channel but what I like to do is pull different topics from the YouTube
community to try to help you improve your mental and emotional well-being and
a big part of that is your relationships and because I make videos for those of
you who so we're coming onm Jake Paul and Erika Costell break up. And we're coming off the heels of the Shane Dawson series of you know updates on that okay cool
that's cool to talk about when it comes to relationships from this situation by
two people yes two people the first one being my man
Peter monn so if you don't know who Peter monn is he had four or five
YouTube channels his biggest one is his drama channel but if you like me you'll
like what he does if you haven't checked them out yet because he talks about
problems but he focuses on the solution he's not just like all drama
he gives his opinion and he and I have a lot of the same views on things he's all
someone who's in long-term recovery he has way more time than I do my anyway
some of you asked me like you know my opinions or thoughts on Peter monn I
love Peter monn had you screwed up yes but I truly think that his heart is in the
right place and he's always trying to learn and grow so the second personal
gunshot out is Lesley Lesley was talking to me on Twitter when I was watching the
video so Thank You Lesley because Leslie brought up a very good point about these
unrealistic expectations so here comes old man Chris real quick but back in my
day we didn't have all the social media but about me I used to be obsessed and
I'm talking obsessed with romantic comedies I would sit and watch romantic
comedies growing up I loved watching them as I got older really drunk and
watch romantic comedies but but we're gonna talk about today this is gonna
lean into modern times in social media romantic comedies still exist but yeah
but this is more relatable to social media but anyways what happens and this
is a huge issue this is a huge issue because I want the the core idea of this
video to be your unrealistic expectations so when it comes to me
watching rom-coms right or even TV in general growing up I was getting
unrealistic expectations of what real relationships were like right so when
you watch romantic comedies they always follow the same formula right you know
guy girl they meet up you know comment and do some random like series of events
they run into each other they following up then they get into a big fight their
makeup and come back together and it ends right and that's what I thought
relationships should be like right a little
drawn together you're gonna live together happily ever after like
something that thought about more as an adult as someone who's matured more
emotionally and mentally as I where are these people five years from now right
but I was brain watching myself by setting up these unrealistic
expectations about what relationships should be like and it's screwed up a lot
of my relationships moving forward so now when we're looking at Jake Paul and
Erika Costell break up in this YouTube age in this social media age like there's all
this like hashtag relationship goals and stuff and you have to realize you have
to realize that you are only seeing the best the best of what these people want
to show you okay like Peter monn brought it up in his video
when he was talking about this like he was talking about how you know people
are shocked or surprised or let down or whatever because all they do is show you
the best parts like I watch on every episode of the Shane Dawson series right
I don't watch Jake and Erika but if you watch the Jake Paul series from Shane
Dawson like you see it looks like this amazing beautiful relationship but
clearly stuff was going on that we didn't know about right like in Jake's
tweet he said we broke up a while ago like the Shane Dawson series just ended
so how long is a while ago but not only when you're watching like youtubers and
their breakups like think about what you're doing like how depressed you are
how lonely you are when you're scrolling through Instagram your throat scrolling
through Facebook like I don't think social media is what's making people
depressed I think it's the way we look at social media which is making us
depressed and you have to figure out like when you're scrolling through
Instagram you're seeing all these happy couples and you're sitting there beating
yourself up like oh I wish I had a relationship like that I wish I had this
I wish I had like they're only showing you the best parts of themselves and you
have to remember that when you're going through social media so when that
depression kicks in you have to realize that those are unrealistic expectations
and here is the best example I can give you the best example I can give you I
had a really good friend that I worked with who and I we work together and then
we ended up working in the same department but we talked a lot and she
was dating this guy for about two years but anyways like she
confided in me and you know told me about all the relationship problems and
she knew I was in recovery so a lot of the time she was asking me like if he
was an alcoholic but every time we would go outside to have a conversation like
she would just tell me about their terrible relationship just awful
relationship just how he's texting other girls and flirting with other girls how
he fights with her and gets mad at her for the dumbest things about how he's
always always in a bad mood all sort of things like she would just tell me just
how terrible the relationship was like she would leave him on a regular basis
and go stay with family or I think even one time she like went to the hotel for
a week or two just to get away from him there's all these things that she vented
to me about but when you win on social media we win on social media like all it
was was just how happy they were every time they went out it was these couple's
goals every time that went out it was how much she loved him I'm sitting there
and it's just this is something that people do and it really it really
baffles me but we're always trying to put on this facade right I talk to you
that's a lot about caring way too much about what people think like we try to
put these things out of here to make everybody think we're in this happy
perfect relationship when we're not right and what ends up happening is we
stand toxic relationships way too long we lie to ourselves you know and then
there's people like you who are scrolling through social media wondering
why you don't have that person that perfect relationship but I'm giving you
a real life experience I've had where I knew what they were posting on social
media was not the reality of the situation so I want you to remember that
as you're watching these couples or anything on YouTube you know some
youtubers have talked about like forced happiness of fake happiness and like
that's why I love youtubers who just get real with you who just get real because
that's what real life is is ups and downs like perfection it should never be
your goal in any situation you should never try to make your relationships
perfect you should never try to make your self perfect like just strive for
better way because especially any of you who are like perfectionist this can make
you beat yourself up and what happens is and what happened to me with my
unrealistic expectations of relationships like any tiny
fight that me and a girlfriend would get in I'm like this is terrible this is
awful right because movies TV shows social media youtubers whatever taught
me that relationships were supposed to be perfect but that's not the reality of
the situation so doesn't behoove in following me for a
while you know about my beautiful girlfriend
so for example Tristan and I are moving in a week okay Tristan has her own
anxiety maybe we can do a video sometime about two anxious people making a
relationship work we love each other so much but anyways moving is stressful
like moving is stressful if you've ever moved in your life it's stressful I used
to move once a year right we're getting our own place there's supposed to be
this happy event but it's stressful right transferring all the bills were
this morning moving stuff and packing stuff and it's only a week away and you
know she is much more organized and structured than I am organized way
that's where her and I kind of you know we we butt heads a little bit but this
morning we had a great conversation and like you know we were we were both
getting a little upset about the move and we're both stressed and like we we
brought it back down and we compromise and we work with each other and we
communicate it you know and I want you guys to know about that stuff because
that's the perfect relationship for me is Tristan and I are people you know we
don't always agree we don't like man some of the videos I put up she
completely disagrees with you know what I'm saying like I take her opinion into
account all the time and then we kind of find this happy medium ground so I don't
want any of you to ever look at like me and twisties relationship and say it's
perfect it's the best relationship I have ever been in in my entire life but
like I want to be transparent with all of you because I don't want you to ever
look at me and see that everything is all perfection that's what I try to be
real and honest with you guys so anyways the moral of this
is look out for these unrealistic expectations that you're seeing off
social media that you're seeing on YouTube if you're seeing in romantic
comedies whatever it is and lower your expectations have realistic expectations
I swear to you your relationships will get better your depression will start to
calm down if you're somebody who's single watching this but like please
please please work on this and let me know let me know down in the comments
below do you feel do you feel that you have unrealistic expectations of
relationships or life in general just because of what you see on youtube or on
social media let's have a conversation down in the comments below okay or if
you ever if you have a story that's similar to mine about my friend who was
always having problems with her relationship but then posted that
everything was perfect online maybe you've done it or you've had a friend
who's done it let's talk about in the comments below okay anyways that's all I
got with this video if you like this video please give it a thumbs up if
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make a ton of videos everybody supported a patreon you are all amazing if you
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and sign up for as little as a dollar a month thanks so much for watching have
realistic expectations and I'll see you next time