(Intro, but...)
SMG4: *Pain*
Luigi: Oh no...
(Music)
Luigi: ♪Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! Jingle all the way!♪
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Luigi: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Mario: (More Faux-Italian Speak)
Luigi: (More Faux-Itailan Speak)
Mario: (Even More Faux-Italian Speak)
Gourmet Guys: COOKIES!!
Gourmet Guys: COOKIES!! Mario: WHOA!
(Luigi Laughing)
Luigi: (Slower) Oh, yeah...!
Mario: Mama F***er!
Mario: Hell no! Oh, hell no!
Mario: Woah! Da-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!
Luigi: Wah! Ehhh?
(It's Goomba)
(Luigi terrified)
(Crash!)
Goomba: dafuq
(Mario Wheeeeeeeeeee!)/(Luigi screaming throughout...)
(Pipe SFX) x2
(More Crash)
Mario: Okie Dokie!
(SFX: Window shatters)
(Door Open)
???: Hellloooo
Mario & Luigi (Sgt. Hartman's voice): WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!
Ben (JonTron's voice): Ooh! /(BGM: Apple Kid's Theme - EarthBound)
Luigi : (altophobia) Mario...!
Mario: Ohoho! (Italian gibberish)
Luigi: Wah!
Ben: SHADDAP GRANDMAAAAA!!
(Luigi Laughing)
X: Mmmmhhhhh
(Door Close)
Mario: Mmmmm...!
(PINGAS)
*Boom*
Mario: Rrrgh! (Faux-Italian gibberish)
Mario: (More Faux-Italian gibberish) Mama Mia...
Mario: Aaah! No!
(Instant Weegee)
Mario: Ah ha ha ha ha ha haaaaa!
Luigi: Mario...?
Mario & Luigi: Yaayyyyyyyy
Mario: Hmm...
(SFX: Coin!)
(Plumber SFX)
Mario: Done!
Luigi (Demoman's voice): Ah, no...
Luigi: (Faux-Italian gibberish) (Captioner's note: I can do this all day)
Mario: (Faux-Italian gibberish)
Luigi: (Faux-Italian gibber- Okay, I'll stop now.)
Luigi: Mama mia.
Luigi: Eh? Wow.
Luigi: Ohoohoo
Ben: HEY!
Luigi: Ohoohoohoo!
(Ben must defend his Mr. Squidge!)
Ben: I RAPE YOU!!
Luigi: Waah!
(Sagely advice from X)
Luigi: (Crying) Mario...!
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak) Ohoho!
(SFX: Bob-Omb)
Mario: Waaaaah! *Boom*
Mario: Oof!
Mario: Ooh!
Mario: Mama mia!
Mr Squidge: !!!
*Game Boy Jump SFX*
Luigi: Ooooh (Slower Eeeeehhhhh)
Luigi: BGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGLBGBLGBLGBLGBLGBLGBLGBLG
(Somebody help Luigi)
(Jump SFX)
(Splish!)
Mario: So Long, f***er!
Luigi: (Slower) Ooohhh...!
Luigi: AGH! OH MY GOD!
Luigi: Oohhh
(Boom)
Ben: WHO TOUCH MY FISHY FISHY?!
Luigi: Waah! x3
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak)/(Also, Po humping the window in the background)
(Door Broken)
Ben (Homer's voice): DON'T MIND IF I DO!
Mario: Wah!
(It was at this moment that he knew...)
(He fucked up.)
Mario: Aah!
Mario: Ohohoho
Mario: Whoa!
(Pipe SFX)
Luigi: (Crying)
(More Pipe SFX)
(Punch!)
Mario: ...Hohohoho!
(Pipe SFX X2) Mario: Ooh! / (Instant Weegee?)
Luigi: Oh Yeah, Nintendo!
Luigi: Mario?
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Luigi: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Mario: No
Luigi: No!
Mario: NO
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak) >:-(
Luigi: Ohhh (Faux-Italian Speak)
Mario: Mama F***er! Rrrgh!
*Heads up, Mario!*
Mario: Wah!
(It's The Pirate)
??? (Bruce's voice): Hello.
Mario & Luigi: (Both screaming)
(It be Cap'n LardButt!)/(BGM: Battle Against an Armed Boss - Super Mario RPG)
Luigi: Oh, yeah. Okie-dokie! (Teeth Drop)
Mario: No...!
(Mario & Luigi screaming)
Ben: I RAPE YOU! (Again)
Mario: Bullsh*t! Rrrgh! / Luigi: (Crying)
Ben: YEAH!
*Le S.S Booty!*
Luigi: (Still screaming...) Bleh.
*S.S Booty Swim SFX*
LardButt: Okie Dokie
(BGM: You Are a Pirate - LazyTown)
Mario: AHHHHHHHHH! / (Pirate song continues)
10 Minutes Later.
(BGM: The Lonely Island - I'm On a Boat)
(I'm on a Boat)
(Luigi laughing, Mario's frustrated growl)
Mario: LUIGI! / Luigi: Wawawawa...!
Luigi: Sorry.
(Record scratch)
Ben: YESSSS!
Mario: All right! (Captioner's note: I prefer "All Right" over "Alright")
Mario: Yahoo!
Luigi: Waah! Mario!
Mario: Whoopee!
Mario: Mother FU-
(BGM: Wide, Wide Ocean - Mario Party)
Luigi: BLGBLGBLG/Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Ben: No!
Mario: Rrrgh!
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak) Mama Mia!
(Donkey Kong imitating airplane)
(Gay Teletubbie party)
(SFX: Coin!)
(LE PIRATE SHIP!)
LardButt (JonTron's voice): OOH!
LardButt: EEEEEEYAAAAAARGH!/(BGM: Pirate Land - Mario Party 2)
LardButt: EEEEEEYAAAAAARGH!! X2
LardButt: EEEEEEYAAAAAARGH!!! X3
LardButt: EEEEEEYAAAAAARGH!!!! X4
Mario: Yeah! (laughs)
Ben: YOU ASSHOLE!
Mario: Oh, jesus christ!
Luigi: Mama Mia!
Mario: AH, JESUS CHRIST! AW, F**K! (panicking)
Mario: AH SH*T! *Punch!*
Mario: Oh-Ho
*LardButt Look Too Stupid*
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Ben: WHAT?!
LardButt: YOU TRAITOR!
Ben: AHH?
LardButt: AHHHHHHHH!
LardButt (PewDiePie's voice: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I DON'T GET MY TURKEY SANDWICH!!
(BGM: Sirena Beach - Super Mario Sunshine)
(You've been a bad boy, Ben)
Mario: Rrrgh! (Slower) No...!
(Mario groans)
Mario: Okie Dokie!
(Dat ass. Also, that same gleam SFX from Dexter's Lab)
Luigi: (Friday SFX) DAAAAMN!
Mario: Wahoo! YEAH!!
(SFX: Thunder rumbling)
(SFX: EARTHQUAAAAAKE!!)
Mario: Da-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!
(AHHHHH IT'S THE MONSTER)/(BGM: VS. Boss - Super Mario Sunshine)
Mario & Luigi: (Both screaming)
*The Pirate Ship Be Held*
Luigi: Waah! (Crying) Help me...!
Mario: Rrrgh! (Faux-Italian Speak)
Mario: Mama F***er!
Mario: Take-a that!
*Bob-omb SFX* (GTFO Bob-omb)
*Boom*
Mario: Take-a this!
Waluigi Launcher: WAAHHHHHH!
Mario: Aaah!
Mario: Fire!
Mario: Hammer!
Mario: Nintendo!
Mario: Oohoohoohoo weeeeh!
Ben: Oh my god! Is that-?
Mr Squidge: What's up?
Ben: He's back!
Monster: (D'oh I Missed!)
Ben: RAAAGGHHHHHHHHH!!!
*Jump SFX*
Ben: LERROOOOOOOYYYYY
Ben: JEEEEENKINSSSSSS
(Blooper chokes)
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak) X3
*The ship be sinking!*
Luigi: (Crying)
*Monster is ded. Not big surprise.*
(Crash!)
Luigi: Agh!
(BGM: All-Star Rest Area - Super Smash Bros. Melee)
Ben: Oh, he's back. It's finally him!
Ben: Ah. I've been right here.
Ben: I've been waiting for ya to come home, baby.
*Doorbell SFX*
X: Woohoo...
Mario: (Faux-Italian Speak)
Mario: (More Faux-Italian Speak) Bye Bye!
*Mario Bros. drivin' outta here*
*Crash*
X (Homer's voice): SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP!
Ben: Yay...!
(Some subtitle "corrections" by some doofus named KimonoFlareonGX)
(I only wanted to keep the subtitles as clean as possible. Thanks for contributing!)