It's interesting to me that there's a
a bunch of people that could say, you know,
'cause you get on the Walking Dead,
and you're on it from the beginning.
And it's such this iconic character
you get to play, and you really nail it.
And then, famously, you're killed not just once, but twice.
Oh yeah. Yeah.
You know, because you can't take
Jon Bernthal out with just one.
(laughing)
You've gotta . . . Trust me, I've tried.
This man will not die. And so. . .
But you get off the series and so there are a lot
of people that might think, and then that's just,
obviously the series is just starting to gain momentum.
And so there might be some people that would think,
"Well, shit, I wish I could have stayed on
for 10 years, 11 years."
But actually, I think for someone like you,
that frees you up.
For sure.
In its own way, it's a gift
because then you get to go on and do all these other things
and show who you are, and show different sides of yourself.
So to me, I often think there are many times
in my life where I've thought, "dammit, it's over."
It's over.
"I screwed up, it's over."
Or I wanted something to go my way,
it didn't go my way, and I'm done.
And I guess that's it.
And then when I later on "Google Earth" and look
at the whole picture, I realize that was
the greatest thing that could have happened
to me at that moment.
Of course. Yeah.
It's always . . . I really try to exercise not calling it,
not saying it's one way or the other, you know?
Sure. At the time I was like, "Well, this is, right?
This is just in line
with everything else that's ever happened
in my life," you know?
It's like, here we are, I finally got on this show.
It's finally taken off, and boom,
they got me the hell outta there, you know.
Like, pack a your shit and go.
And I remember going back to The Walking Dead
to go pick up my truck.
And I remember like walking out
and seeing them sort of shoot this first episode
that I wasn't gonna be in.
And I wanted to go say goodbye to everyone.
And instead of saying goodbye, I just sat
on this rock in the woods,
and just watched this beautiful sort of symphony
of the barn was on fire and there were all these zombies.
And I saw Norman doing his thing and Scott Wilson,
rest in peace, just standing out on the--
you know bellowing, and just this beautiful crew,
and these people there, my family.
And I saw them all working, and I just palpably understood
I'm not part of that anymore.
They're doing their thing.
And I sat there, and I weeped, and I felt sorry
for myself, and I knew it was over.
And look, you know, the only thing I can look at
with Walking Dead is just unbelievable full gratitude.
Yep. Yep.
And just full gratitude, like what a privilege,
what an honor, what a thing to play a character
with a real beginning, middle, and end.
But more than anything, you know, Stephen and Norman
and Scott and Melissa and IronE, and Sarah, and Andy.
I mean, these are like lifelong friends
who really taught me how to be an artist
and a father and a husband all at the same time.
And to trim so much fat off your life and whittle it down.
And those are the guys, those are my closest friends,
you know, in this business.
And I mean you know, those guy . . . I mean,
they're beautiful human beings.
Yeah. I've interviewed just, I think I've interviewed
everyone you've mentioned.
They're great people.
Great people.
I would've handled that differently.
I would've been sitting on the truck and watching them
shoot a scene without me now that I'm gone.
And I would've just started screaming,
"I don't fuckin' need you!"
(laughing) That would be in every take.
"You needed me!"
And they'd be, like, "Cut!"
(laughing)
"Conan, can you please? You had two good years.
And roll! Let's go. Action!"
Can we get him outta here?
"Fuck you!"
(laughing)
And then I'd do donuts in my truck,
be knocking over zombies, and they'd be like,
"Come on, man."
Right, right, right. Blaring some Danzig.
Yeah, no, I mean, I dunno man.
(laughing)
You know, I'll say it.
I just like, you know . . .
"You'll regret this."
Yeah. And they . . . I think it's also okay
to feel a second of that pain or to wonder.
But yeah, looking back at it, without a doubt,
doing that show was the best thing that ever happened
to me in my career.
And then I think getting killed off
was the best thing that ever happened
to me in my career.
And I'm flabbergasted and grateful for all of it.