- Going to die, God is not going to ask you,
"Which husband have you married?"
or "Which guy have you dated?"
He's going to ask you,
"What have you done with the life that I gave you?"
(upbeat brass music)
Hello, beautiful ladies.
It's Greta Bereisaite here, dating and relationship coach,
and today, I have a wonderful surprise for you ladies.
But before I introduce my very special guest,
let me share how I have heard about him.
So, I had a client a few years ago who asked me,
can I recommend any other relationship coaches
where my advice would align with theirs?
And I said, "No, I actually don't know any."
And then she got back to me a couple months later and said,
"Greta, you have to check out RC Blakes.
He is a pastor who used to be a bad boy,
and now is coaching women how to be queens,
and not to be manipulated by men.
She said, "Your advice match like butter on toast."
So, I went and checked RC Blakes out.
So today, ladies, I have with me
author, pastor and a husband
of a wonderful queen, Lisa Blakes,
RC Blakes.
So, RC Blakes, thank you so much
for coming to my YouTube channel.
I have read your incredible book, "Queenology",
and the message in the book
really aligns with what I coach,
as you're coaching how to be a queen
in life and personal relationships, and yeah,
I just really, really love your book.
So, I have a couple of questions towards it.
What would you say would be
a woman who is a queen in a man's eyes?
And the other question would be,
after you answer this one,
what if a king doesn't cross a queen's path?
What does she do, then?
- Well, first of all,
thank you for reading my book, thank you for buying it.
Thank you for having me on your platform.
It is really a blessing to me,
because to be in a world
where men are considered predators in most cases,
and to be trusted by women who are conscious,
I take that to heart, I take it very seriously,
and it's very special to me.
Now, what kind of a woman would a man view as a queen?
I think that's a very good question,
but I think we have to start with the quality of the man
that we're talking about.
In other words, there's a man
that is simply a grown boy,
and that man would not have any real perspective
of what a real queen is,
because he's looking for someone
that he can take advantage of,
he's looking for someone that he can manipulate.
But then, you have a man that is a full-grown man.
In other words, he's conscious of who he is,
he recognizes the power of a conscious,
and a strong, and an independent woman,
and that man is looking for a woman
who knows who she is,
he's looking for a woman
who has not only identified,
but she actually owns her power,
he's looking for a woman who is actualized.
In other words, she's not just a woman with potential,
but she's a woman
that is actually manifesting that potential.
Because any real king,
any man who is really in pursuit
of something greater than himself,
any man that is really building a kingdom,
recognizes this one major fact:
He cannot do it effectively without the right queen.
So, kings are looking for queens.
And when a king is looking for a queen,
in essence, he's looking for a woman
that possesses everything he has.
He's looking for himself in a dress, I like to call it.
He's looking for the female version of himself.
And so, we live in a society, and in a day,
where women are trained and taught,
through religion, through academia,
through media, through entertainment,
to dumb themselves down, to miniaturize themselves,
and that's the worst thing a woman can do.
Because the only way a true king
can recognize a queen,
is that she has to be actualized.
She has to be in form.
And so, a king is looking for himself,
the same kind of drive, the same kind of spirit.
He's looking for that in a woman.
- But what this woman should do?
Because I remember as a little girl,
I was conditioned, for example,
to watching, let's say, my favorite Disney movie,
for example, as a child,
was "A Little Mermaid",
which is a very, as I call, low-value movie,
as what she did, she only met a prince one time,
and then she left the kingdom,
she disobeyed her father,
she gave away her voice,
and I remember, actually, being obsessed with that movie.
So, I think this is how a lot of us
have been conditioned.
So, what would you recommend for girls
who believe in the other way around?
- What you're asking me is what would I recommend
to a woman that wants to shift from that conditioning?
- What if a woman is not open to shift?
- Well, if a woman is not really open to shift,
I don't think there's much that anybody can do for her.
A woman has to come to a point and a time and a place
where she realizes that she's been limited to a box,
and that she's greater than her present reality.
The sad thing is that most women suffer
from what I call broken consciousness.
They are not aware of who they really are.
They're not aware of the power they really possess.
And so, for this woman,
you cannot really do much for her,
but hopefully, expose her
to what an actualized woman looks like,
what a queen looks like.
And hopefully, it awakens something in her.
But I think with all of us,
until we come to a place where we are conscious of the fact
that we've been limited, and we've been
paralyzed, to a certain extent,
I don't think it's until we're willing to embrace a process
that anything can really happen for us.
- Yeah, I agree with you.
You cannot push somebody to change if they don't want to,
or if they are too closed-minded for it.
If the king doesn't come across your path,
what should a queen do? - Well you know,
it's interesting that you would ask that question.
- What would you recommend? - Because that's probably,
oh my God, the question I get the most emails of,
and the DMs about "What if a king never shows up?
"What if he never shows up?"
And I'm like, well, I think with life,
we all have to prioritize,
and I think that before we get to the relationship piece,
in terms of our lives,
I think that there are some other fundamental
and mandatory components that have to be in place.
You know, if I never met my wife Lisa,
there would still be a purpose for me
to find and to fulfill.
If I never met Lisa,
there would still be a refinement of myself
that would be necessary.
In other words, I would still need to perfect myself,
and to grow.
If I never ever met Lisa, I would still
need to build my kingdom, so to speak, financially.
I would still need to take care of my health.
I would still need to do all of these things.
And so, there's a whole lot of living
that has to happen as an individual,
before one is actually coupled with another anyway.
And so, I think what happens
with a lot of ladies, and even gentlemen,
is that we get so carried away
with the idea of the king showing up,
that we do not put our full attention,
or our time into developing the queen that is within.
It's kind of like a pair of shoes
is the illustration I always use.
Every pair of shoes, typically,
is, they are the same size, they are the same kind,
and they are left and right.
Distinctly a left shoe, distinctly a right shoe.
But before you can make them a pair,
the left shoe has to have gone through the complete process
of being formed and created as a left shoe.
Its process has to be complete.
The right shoe, the same.
And when both of the shoes, individually, are complete,
then you can bring them together,
and put them in a box and sell them as a pair.
If you put a whole right shoe,
and a half a left shoe in a box and try to sell it,
you can't sell it, because it's not a pair.
It's not a pair until the individual shoes
have been completed.
So, my message is, to every woman,
that is perfecting her queen consciousness,
and is yet waiting on the king,
is, keep perfecting you, keep working on you.
Don't live your life
constantly looking over your shoulder, around every corner,
waiting for Prince Charming, or the king, to show up.
Live your life perfecting yourself as a queen.
I think it was even in England, if I'm not mistaken.
I think it was Queen Elizabeth.
I think it was Queen Elizabeth who never had a husband.
But yet she ruled the greatest, yeah.
She ruled the greatest country in the world.
Now, history has it that she wanted a man.
History has it that she wanted a man.
But the reality was that
she did not allow her desire for a man
to prevent her from maximizing herself as a queen,
and it did not prevent her from maximizing her kingdom.
Every woman, while she's waiting on the king,
must maximize her kingdom.
And that's very, very real.
That's very, very real.
- You know, in Lithuania as well,
the President is a woman,
and she's never been married,
but the President of Lithuania is a woman.
- There you have it.
I think these are great lessons for every woman.
Just really devote yourself, and commit yourself
to being your best version,
and keep waking up every day perfecting that,
and allow the things like a relationship,
allow that to happen in its own time.
But, master what you can control.
- Also, I use this saying quite a lot,
and I think it's from a pastor as well.
I'm not sure, maybe it's actually your saying, to be honest.
But it goes like this, when you going to die,
God is not going to ask you,
"Which husband have you married?"
or "Which guy have you dated?"
He's going to ask you,
"What have you done with the life that I gave you?"
So, I just love it.
I think it just puts everything into perspective.
If only women followed it,
and wouldn't be going the other way around.
- Absolutely, that's a good saying.
It's not mine, but it's a great saying.
- I was just like, "Am I using your one?"
- No.
- Okay, so thank you so much.
Thank you so much for sharing,
agreeing to be on my channel.
I really appreciate you spreading the message,
and I love the books,
and I'll actually put the "Queenology" and all the links,
how you can, ladies, reach out to RC Blakes,
and check out his YouTube channel
in my YouTube video description down below.
So, if you'd like to follow RC Blakes and buy his books,
just follow the links in my YouTube video description.
Thank you so much!
Thank you so, so much for sharing, I'm very grateful.
- Thank you.
- Have a beautiful day!
- And you do the same,
hope to talk to you soon.
- Talk to you soon, bye-bye!
- Bye-bye!