- Hey, it's Pastor Cal.
Hit the jab.
[bottle pops] - Cheers, baby.
- And Dr. Pepper. Let's talk about sex.
- [laughs]
- You are from this moment engaged.
- I think I'm tearing up.
- This is "Married at First Sight: Relationship Rewind."
[upbeat music]
[tape rewinding]
Each week Dr. Pepper and I watch a clip
from the latest episode of "Married at First Sight,"
and we're gonna give you our honest, no B.S. reactions.
- This will be the very first time
that we're seeing this footage.
- And we're about to see Airris having a conversation
with Jasmine's mom.
- Oh, let's watch it. - I know, right?
- So, um, the relationship in general--
how you feeling about that?
- Mm. - Um...
it's going okay. It could be better.
I mean, I feel like that's marriage in general.
- Uh-huh. - You know, like--
- See, but, like, "That's marriage in general"--
He has this vision of marriage
that it's somehow devitalized.
- Yes, absolutely. Absolutely.
- Told Dr. Pepper that she wants to have
"deeper" conversations.
You know, and Dr. Pepper gave us, like,
a whole bunch of questions to ask each other.
It might be like, "What is your favorite color?"
I might be like, "Man, blue is my favorite color
"because when I was in second grade,
"I seen the color blue, and every time I see blue"--
- So he's showing how he digs into a question
and makes it bigger.
- Yeah, but he has to understand
how she communicates. - And I'm, "Okay, Jasmine,
what's your favorite color?"
"Oh, it's pink." - Let's just stop right there.
What we're dealing with here is that Jasmine
does not feel valued.
She's saying, "Look, you haven't even shown
the slightest amount of interest in me."
I don't believe she feels safe enough around him
to even go to that depth, but let's see.
- Like, you said you wanted deep.
- Yeah. - You said--
I'm not taking words out of your mouth.
You said for you to feel better in this--
- So the question is does she actually shut down now
because she thinks there's nothing there for her?
Or is she not used to how you sort of take the, you know,
layers of an onion off a question?
- Yeah.
- Pull certain things out of her.
- Most of the time, when you feeling like,
"You holding something back,"
nine times out of ten, she is.
- Mom, she knows her. - Yes, and she's saying
that he's talking about something real.
- And I told her, in order for you to teach someone
how to make you happy, you gotta know what make you happy.
- She is an incredibly giving person.
- Oh, you know, she's reminded of that too.
- She is such a giver.
- She also shared with me that you guys said
that y'all weren't gonna have sex till Decision Day.
When she shared that with me, I was just like...
[gasps] But what if
tomorrow something happ--
like, it could-- something could happen over--
- Yeah. - In a split second.
- She understands the value of sexual intimacy.
- Yes, she does.
- And then there you have missed out
on an opportunity. - Hold it right there.
- It's a horrible approach.
- It's a horrible approach. I agree.
I think just taking sex off the table
until after Decision Day is a way of
not dealing with the real issue they have,
which is can they connect sexually as husband and wife?
- Absolutely. - And there's no reason
to take it off the table.
Maybe it breaks down the walls.
Sexuality produces all that oxytocin.
See if that tool works.
- Hey, you don't have to convince me.
I'm a fan of oxytocin.
- [laughs]
- Let's keep playing it.
- For me, I n-- I like, like, connections,
and a lot of times, those connections come
from, like, a shared interest.
- You have shared interests.
We matched you for that reason. - Right.
- Because you have shared interests.
- But he's saying he's-- that's the kind of discussion
he needs... - Yeah. Yeah.
- To get more deeply into her.
But he could make that happen.
- He can make it happen.
The ball's in his court. - Right.
- You know, it would be, like, natural.
- Wait. Rewind that.
- And it would be easier if, like,
these things that I'm searching for were in play.
You know, 'cause it would be, like, natural.
- I don't buy it. I don't buy what he's saying.
She's attracted to him.
She wants him to simply just want her.
- Well, I'm gonna buy it for a moment here.
You know, on one sense, we've thought he's a player,
and I'm not saying he hasn't been,
but on the other hand, he could be kind of a sapiosexual,
which is, you know, you turn on to the other person's mind...
- Right. Right. - Or feelings, experiences,
etcetera. She shut down.
She's not giving him any of that.
It's not gonna help him get to the place he wants to go.
If it's true. If what he's saying is true.
- If what he's saying is true. - That he needs something
to build on. - Yeah.
Okay. - I think you overthink,
and I think she overthinks.
- She's so good at trying to be supportive of both people
in this marriage. - She really is.
- And she's right on the overthinking.
Absolutely. - You gotta get out your head.
- Yes. - Get out of your comfort zone.
- That is important. - Good advice.
- That's called life and marriage.
- She understands what it takes to make it work.
- And she's being very generous to her son-in-law.
- She really is. - She really is being
very supportive. - She really is.
- She's impressive. - Yeah, she didn't seem to take
any side there. - No.
- She's very objective. - She's great.
- I believe that Jasmine, because she wants this
and because she wants him, that's a great place
to start in a marriage.
- Yes, but he has got to give her more assurance
that there's some desire for her.
- Yeah, because she doesn't feel like she's getting
anything out of the relationship.
- And so she's shutting down... - Yeah.
- And it's--you know, even though he's starting
to look for a deeper kind of connection.
What he's got to do is figure out a way
to help get those things out of her
by reassuring her that he values her...
- Right. - So that he can start to know
her in ways where he can see
how much they do have in common. - Yeah.
Absolutely.
Well, that's all the time we have
for this "Relationship Rewind."
- We'll see you next time.
[upbeat music]
- ♪ No holding back ♪