- What is this?
- Dough.
- No it's not, it's bread, French bread, le French.
I'm Scott, and I eat all kinds of pizza.
- I'm Mark, and I'm a pizza purist.
- So we are hitting the road to taste
the craziest concoctions claiming to be pizza.
- But are they "Really Dough?"
- Back, on the open road.
- That lasagna was a beast.
- I got to be honest,
I might need like maybe another hour before the next slice.
- Didn't I already tell you
I don't want pizza right now?
- I know you said that, but I feel like sometimes--
- No really, I can't do pizza right now.
- What do you want to get?
Enchiladas, quesadillas?
- How about hot dogs?
- You know Boston is not known for their hot dogs.
- I just need a break from pizza, I want a hot dog.
- OK, OK.
A friend of mine told me about a hot dog joint in Boston.
Maybe we hit that up before we get the next slice.
What do you put on those?
Are you a mustard guy?
Don't tell me you're a ketchup guy.
- Mustard, sauerkraut, and onion, all three.
- There is actually, oh you know what?
There's some really good pizza there, I wish--
- Every now and then you got to let the hostage,
you know, make the decisions.
- You're not a hostage.
I definitely lost my cool.
- You resorted to kidnapping.
- I resorted to, trying to, show my friend a good time.
If that's a crime, take me away.
Here's the place.
- Oh, we're here?
- Yeah.
- It says Spike's Junkyard Dogs.
- Dogs.
But I mean, like, there's not even a pizza oven here.
I don't, I'm not gonna have anything
to talk about with this person.
Hey, how's it going?
- Good, what would you like?
- Whaddya you got?
- Most people start with a hot dog.
- Listen, I'm not a hot dog guy,
I gotta be totally honest.
My buddy Mark is with me,
I've been feeding him pizza all week,
'cause I'm a pizza nerd.
And then he said, "Well like let's take a break
"from that and get a hot dog,"
and I heard you guys had good hot dogs.
So, I need a little bit of guidance on this menu.
- Start on this board here,
most popular one is the second one down.
- You got like, how many, you said 30 hot dogs?
- Plus.
- 30 hot dogs plus what?
- There's additional dogs behind you.
- Wow, you got burgers, chicken sandwiches,
and then, wait...
What's Junkyard pizza?
- Our pizza, we make it on our hot dog roll.
- Wait a second, you have pizza here?
- Yeah, it's a French bread style.
- So wait, you gotta understand.
I took Mark here, because you're not a pizza place.
Now you're telling me you have pizza?
You don't understand what kind of dream
you're making coming true for us.
- Cool.
- Can I just get like, two slices?
- We don't do slices, it's French bread style.
But you can get two of those.
- Right.
Got some drinks.
- Finally, something that's not pizza.
- Yeah.
- Dough, sauce, cheese.
That's it.
A city's got flavor.
You should be able to taste that when you eat there.
Pizza should be eaten with your hands.
Never a fork and knife.
You all right?
- I'm nervous.
- Why?
- Afraid you're gonna murder me.
- Why?
- They've got a very expansive menu
and I didn't realize that until I got up there.
Have a drink.
- So I'm gonna make the two Junkyard pizzas.
- Gentleman, we can build it,
we can make it tastier.
- Toast up the bottom, get it nice and crispy.
- We have the ingredients, and the oven.
- Take the rolls out and top it with our pizza sauce.
Then our Mozzarella, all right?
- We have the capability to make French bread into a pizza.
- Take it down, plate it up.
Junkyard pizzas, take 'em out.
Here we go guys.
- Oh, sweet!
- Two junkyard pizzas.
- What is this?
- It's not a pizza--
- You can eat it.
- Mark, it's not a pizza.
- It's a pizza: dough, sauce, cheese.
- No it's not, look, what's this?
- Is it not a dough base?
- It isn't, no, it's a bread base.
- What is bread made from?
- Dough that's been baked, intentionally.
This was a finished bread, this had a life.
It could have had a life.
- The guy said, "here are your pizzas."
- He made a mistake.
What was his name, Spike?
Spike, you made the bread right?
- I make it here.
- See, OK--
- Scott, Scott, it's too close to pizza.
- Take one bite.
- No.
- OK.
- I told you, I'm not eating anymore pizza.
- OK fine.
- Go get me a hot dog.
- It'll make you happy, I'll get you a hot dog.
You son of a...
Excuse me, sir?
- Round two?
- Yeah, well, I have a little bit of a problem.
- Oh, what's up?
- He does not wanna eat pizza.
He needs a hot dog.
I'm thinking maybe for me, I'll get something,
do you have anything that has like, mozzarella on it?
- Yeah, I have a pizza dog.
- Pizza dog?
- Yeah, one of my favorites is that pepperoni pizza dog.
- It's like, mozzarella and sauce?
- Pizza sauce, on the dot.
- Wait, let me clarify.
It's bun, pepperoni--
- Dog, sauce, cheese.
- OK, let's get two of those.
- OK, all right, we'll bring them over.
- Thanks, we're still going on root beers.
- OK.
- Thank you.
- Gentleman, we can rebuild it.
We can make it even tastier.
We still have the ingredients.
- Pizza sauce, and add our mozzarella.
Take about two minutes, to get 'em nice and brown.
- We have the capability to turn a hot dog into a pizza.
- Take them out to the guys.
It's two of my favorites, pizza dog.
- You little d!@#head.
- Look at this thing,
It's the French bread like we had before,
with a hot dog, tomato sauce, and cheese.
Now according to some of your rules,
dough, sauce, and cheese equals pizza.
Is that a hot dog or a pizza?
- Scott, I want a hot dog.
- This, is a hot dog.
OK, for you, this is a pizza, right?
If I stick a hot dog in there and fold it over,
is it a pizza anymore?
It was French bread the moment it came out
of the oven the first time.
- Sauce, cheese, Scott, you're breaking your rules.
That's a pizza.
- It's got sauce, it's got cheese.
- What is this?
- That's you!
- That's me?
- Yeah!
It's got dough, it's got sauce, it's got cheese,
it's a pizza.
- That's not what I sound like.
- Scott it's a pizza.
- Lower pitched, and masculine.
If I stick a hot dog in there and fold it over,
is it a pizza anymore?
No, it's a hot dog.
This, is a hot dog.
- This is a hot dog I'm not eating.
- You're like a child, I'll get you what you want.
Problem.
- What do you got?
- It's like eating with a 4 year old.
- No pizza, Scott!
- OK.
You see what I mean?
- Gotcha.
- Can I just get two hot dogs?
- Yeah, no worries.
- That's it, thanks.
Just like plain,
don't even let cheese touch it.
- OK, you want yellow or house mustard?
- House mustard.
- You got it.
So I'm gonna make a couple of regular dogs.
- Gentleman, we've always been able to make it.
It's just a hot dog.
- Place my dogs, and then top them up,
house mustard, a little relish, our onion,
sauerkraut on there.
- I got it, I got it covered.
I really think that what you need
is just something simple.
- Why are you touching my soda?
- I'm moving it, I think you wanted to be at arms--
- No, no, it's good where it is.
- Oh yeah, you're gonna go like this?
Like you're a T-Rex arm? - I don't get you.
- What don't you get about me?
- I specifically said I don't want pizza tonight.
- I ordered you a normal hot dog.
Just the way you like it.
Mustard, onions and sauerkraut.
And guess what?
- What?
- I don't eat my hot dog like that,
but I ordered one for myself like that.
- I don't care if you eat this,
how you eat your hot dog, if you put ketchup on it.
I just want my hot dog.
- Yeah but, we're on a road trip together.
I want to have a shared experience.
That's why everything I order is twinsies.
- Here you go, boys.
A little bit more traditional.
- Thank you.
- You got it, enjoy.
- A hot dog?
- Yes, a hot dog.
Are you happy?
- Yeah, I just want to make sure
there's no sauce and cheese in there.
- There's no sauce and cheese in there.
Although mustard is kind of a sauce.
- Is it OK for me to eat this?
- Of course.
- All right.
- But first, French bread pizza.
Pizza or not a pizza?
- I find it really strange that
you're trying to talk me out of this not being a pizza.
- I think we're on an interesting journey.
You're in Boston for the first time,
experiencing new things.
I figured one of them should be this.
Have you had French bread pizza in your life?
- Never.
- Never?
Sandwich style.
Now, that doesn't taste like pizza right, does it?
- Not a pizza, but close enough.
- French bread pizza, not a pizza.
We agree.
Pizza dog!
- Looks like a pizza with ketchup.
- No it doesn't.
It looks like a hot dog covered in pizza.
Tell me, what are you thinking?
- Not a pizza.
- Pizza hot dog, not a pizza.
Finally, hot dog, Markey style,
with sauerkraut, mustard, relish, and onion.
Pizza or not a pizza?
- Not a pizza.
Definitely a hot dog.
- Wow, you went sideways.
It's a good hot dog.
- It really is.
- I'm sorry, you gotta be able to forgive me with this.
I know you're disappointed, I know you trusted me,
to get you not pizza items.
You gotta understand, my intentions were pure.
That place was a hot dog shop.
- Are you sure you didn't know
there was a pizza on the menu?
- I swear to you.
There was not even a pizza oven in there, right?
- No there was not.
Is there a pizza rehab?
- Pizza rehab?
- Yeah.
- Where like, they feed you lettuce?
- Yeah, like they have a salad bar in there or something.
- I'm sorry, I know you feel like
you haven't had the perfect pizza tour experience.
We're going through Rhode Island.
- You know what, maybe we can make a few more stops
on our way back to Brooklyn from Rhode Island.
- Really?
- Yep, you ever hear of Caserta's?
- In Federal Hill.
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- You know it?
- I have heard of it.
- When in Rhode...
- You mean when in Rome?
- No, Rhode Island.
- Oh my God, that's like a me joke.
- You know what,
maybe we should get back to Brooklyn.
I'm kinda like turning into you.
- No, no, no.
- Ha, time for some real pizza.
- All right, this looks good.
- This pizza's insane.
- It is insane, it's real good.
- All right, where we going next?
- We'll figure it out tomorrow morning.
- All right.
- I need to sleep on it,
but I got a lot of places between here and Brooklyn.
We'll find a nice place by the river to sleep.
Just kidding, just kidding!
Two-star hotel.
Thanks for watching this episode of "Really Dough?"
Don't forget to like, subscribe, and comment below.
And of course if you like what you saw,
watch the other episodes.
Like when I fed Mark a pizza, and he loved it.
- Finally we're having some good pizza.
- This is good pizza, but I fed you a--
- This is a great pizza.
- This is... "And so is all the other stuff
"you took me to, Scott."
"You're so great, Scott.
"Thanks for taking me to these places."
- But no hot dogs.