For some reason I assumed
Tik-tok was going to be a flash in the pan fad that would go away in a couple of weeks like nearly every other trenders
but I guess it's here to stay
great
I'm sure a lot about touch people like myself don't really have a proper understanding
of what tick tock even is and until I researched it I had no idea what the difference was between tick tock and
Musically and as it turns out there really is no difference at all
tick tocks parent company actually purchased musically and merged with them in august of 2018
bringing along all of those young children in the process
Are you really not breathing just for a musically video that's really sad so in a lot of ways my
2016 video about musically still holds true but for some godforsaken reason tick tock is the most popular app of
2018 by far with well over 500 million monthly users and growing with a significant chunk of them being from vatican city
away hang on I
mean China we're talking bigger than Instagram Facebook YouTube or even
Bebo which all have video features of their own but somehow can't hold a candle to what makes tic TOCs so alluring to children and
let's face it
probably a hell of a lot of sexual predators from all around the world the app in function is virtually
Identical to what musically was with a couple more bells and whistles you either mime to already existing songs
mime to audio clips from movies or TV
Mime to other people's stand-up routines mime to other users audio clips react to other people's miming mime along
injunction to other people's miming react to someone miming a reaction alongside
Someone's miming I can't believe that in 2018 is actually cool to be a mime
I
Guess 24 years of wearing the stupid outfits finally paid off
the most memorable feature of note at the moment is the duet mode which allows people to put their
reactions next to the original users video so the cycle goes like this
clueless child uploads embarrassing video that will haunt them for the rest of their lives
then edgy professional Internet comedian and ranta finds said
Mortifying video and reacts to it then it gets shared everywhere and meme to death and then the original child has to live in shame
and or kill themselves because of the humiliation Tech top creators say they're being bullied and the company isn't helping
So some poorly phrased
terrible BuzzFeed article don't upload videos to a public forum for anyone to see then if you can't deal with people joking around at your
expense and seriously if you are a young kid which based on my analytics is
99% of you do not upload videos that you think are either funny queue or
random trust me they are none of those things their shitty unfunny and
awkward and you will 100 percent regrets it in a few years time if not sooner yes pity but defeat attend or die what is
happening just keep it private that goes for any social media but is
Particularly bad on tick tock when you really think about it it's not that much of a mystery as to why this app is so
popular with
250 babies being born a minute and it's something to keep them busy and couple with the fact that every primary school child is
absolutely desperate to become the next Jakob Sartorius or backpack kid or whoever
Gives a new meaning to Andy Warhol's 15 minutes of fame saying although I guess now
It's more like you're one jacksepticeye retweet of Fame or one day of tick-tock for you page Fame
Go that's upsetting we're reaching a point where social media is almost completely incomprehensible
to those who aren't already in it or around people who use it I'm only
24 and I already feel like I'm a confused granddad who's still trying to figure out how to call someone on an iPhone however to
give it a fair shake in a bid to understand what was interesting about this weird app I obviously
Downloaded it and made an account all of my usual monikers were taken so I had to name myself at
Family Guy's so funny for I'm known for my love of Family Guy of course and I quickly started
screwing around trying to decipher it all it's actually relatively easy to pick up and all the features are
surprisingly robust for a free app I can definitely see why kids like it so much
basically a virtual
interactive toy I'm sure a lot of us would have been all about this when we were we're younger unlike YouTube or Facebook or any
video hosting website or app tik-tok actually achieves at making the act of creating one of these stupid videos kind of fun and easy
but let's be real any
Neanderthal can pick up a hammer and wildly flail it around which leads us to what everyone hates about the app the people who use
it
Are those trees oh look at the bird on nature it's just, so
disgusting I'm going back inside top users are mostly
extremely young teenage girls anything from 13 years old and up all most likely younger let's be real it's not hard to fake your age
On these apps is it who have sprung to fame because they're just, so
relatable and absolutely no other reason at all then once they have a considerable fanbase they usually start squirting out abysmal
Music or their own makeup line or whatever they do there's nothing really new here although it is fascinating to watch the bizarre
hierarchy of content that all stems from this one app it begins with some artists creating a song or really hilarious and
brilliantly written TV show then some kid on tick-tock minds along to it then someone within the app
reacts and mocks them or doubles the embarrassment which then leads to someone making a response videos slash
compilations slash tweet slash reddit post as to why it's so funny and/or bad
So in essence those reaction channels that everyone used to think with a literal devil a few years ago on YouTube and now just what
Entertainment is to a lot of people in a weird way they were right all along I mean the biggest
youtuber on the platform basically does reaction videos now there are entire TV shows that are just people
Reacting everything on YouTube is people reacting some things become popular purely because the right people reacted to it I'm reacting to all of this
right now God my brain but what do I hate about this app in particular well plenty
obviously I hate how bad it must make the young impressionable minds who want a genetically perfect beauty squad model feel
I hate how good their marketing is a car good two videos without being advertised tick tock I hate how as long as a product
has an infinite amount of advertising capital behind it that it can
brute-force its way into becoming a popular fad I hate how most of the content on the app is about nothing but
clickbait or boiling down a purse
personality into a fake dolled-up puppet oh
Jesus is it really unfunny I hate how terrible the music is I hate that so many people are still doing that don't judge me
Challenge but they're just not calling it they don't judge me challenge so no one cares I hate how weirdly sexual
everything is for an app used by mostly young children I hate how people
manipulate the platform to trick users into liking their videos or comments
sometimes syncing as far as to use disabled people to get a few totally meaningless likes I hate the reaction of people
shitting out countless videos about tik-tok users as if they're the plague yes an app that appeals to young children
Is going to be producing a lot of embarrassing content how many compilations do you need to make I sound like a miserable
granddad screaming at kids to get off my lawn but come on you know I'm right
no
One over the age of 20 should be using this app and that's being generous it's like opening a virtual door to a school
playground all the kids are singing along to their garbage pop music
joking around
being immature and
dancing any difference now is that it's digital and shareable and open to everyone this time I was going to suggest to any parent who
happens to be on this video to
Steal their kids phone off them and delete the app to save them from the inevitable bullying they'll receive but now
I've got a different idea
I say explain to them the nearly everything you do on this app is going to humiliate you in the future in some way and
That you can't come khurana me when pewdiepie features you and his latest try not to cringe challenge the very least our lesson get out
of their system and I mean if they do get bullied and mocked for it it's a good lesson about how cruel and unforgiving the
Internet can be make every second count yeah make every second count that you're not hearing about this godforsaken app personally
I'm gonna stick to mining to my favorite songs in the mirror in total privacy where
No, one but myself can belittle and judge me for her wince worthy I am
You