It's a manatee orgy season in Florida, and apparently they get very,
very horny during warm summer months, and they mate, which is great.
We wanna protect the mating manatees, they're having a lot of fun,
they're making babies.
But it turns out that Sarasota's PD in Florida had to put out a statement
just asking the fine people of Florida to leave these manatee orgies alone, okay?
So let's take a look at this tweet.
This is the Sarasota Police Department tweeting quote,
we spotted manatees mating near South Lido Beach, Sunday,
folks were trying to touch them, please don't.
If you see a manatee mating herd,
observe respectfully from a distance, do not touch.
If you see a distressed or
deceased manatee call the hotline that they shared there.
So, apparently there was also a herd of about
16 manatees gathered near South Lido Beach for mating.
And that's drawn a lot of attention from visitors.
Sarasota Police said it's fine to observe them, still,
officers said that some people have been going into the water near them and
trying to touch them, which is dangerous and also illegal.
Well, I don't understand humans, I don't understand them.
What kind of pleasure are you getting out of disrupting
these manatees who are in the process of lovemaking?
Just leave them alone.
>> Yeah, we can't help ourselves in interfering with everything.
>> I know, >> Right?
[LAUGH] >> Especially conservatives.
Anything involving sex, conservatives wanna get in the middle of it, right?
They wanna disrupt it, and we just want them out of our business.
>> I like your theory that these are definitely conservatives that
are interfering with the manatees.
>> They're gonna pass an anti-manatee orgy law soon in
Florida, >> Yeah.
>> I have no doubt there.
>> They are going in there with a mic and say which way?
Okay, nope, no, I don't want you doing it that way, I want you to do it.
God intended for you to do the other way.
>> It's like Clarence Thomas is seething about the manatees as we speak.
>> The manatees are like, wait, which God, the human God or the manatee God?
>> [LAUGH] >> What do you mean, it's unnatural?
I'm doing it in nature, I don't get it.
Can you please leave me alone?
Okay, now we're news people, we're responsible,
we don't know that they're conservatives.
Okay [LAUGH] but no matter what you are, leave the manatees alone.
Okay, they're having a good time.
By the way, the real serious thing that we've done to manatees and
all other species is we've nearly wiped them out.
>> I know. >> There's actually one piece of good news
here, but they have to mate so that they could produce more manatees,
otherwise we're gonna restrict their environment, and
they're all going to die out like we've done too many, many different animals.
So, right when they're doing good things, things that we want them to do,
leave them alone, so they can keep going.
So, the one piece of ironic good news here is that because of climate change,
the water is getting warmer and warmer water, apparently, is good for
manatee libido, which I did not know.
>> [SOUND] They got they get real hot in the warm summer months.
>> When they're having sex, apparently, there's a technical term for it, and
I'm not kidding, it's called a manatee ball, okay?
>> Yeah. >> So, they're having a ball, okay?
>> Also, let's just get it acknowledge.
I really wanna emphasize that orgies exist in the natural world, right?
You got 16 manatees getting it on together.
>> You do you boo.
>> I'm not saying I'm interested in that, right, for
myself, I'll definitely- >> The New York Times will pretend
you meant it.
>> I know they will, 100%.
>> [LAUGH] >> No, but
I'm just saying different strokes for different folks, and it's okay,
as long as you're being responsible about it.
>> [LAUGH] In manatees, you don't even have to be responsible about it,
you're goddamn animals, let loose, have some fun.
>> 100%.
>> [LAUGH] >> So, this is an important reminder,
especially since manatees are currently listed as vulnerable
under the Endangered Species Act, and it is actually illegal to touch,
annoy, harass, or molest a manatee.
>> Please don't molest them.
>> Who the hell molest manatees?
>> Who molests manatees?
No, it's definitely Republicans.
[LAUGH] >> You could be fined $100,000 and
face jail time if you're convicted of harassing these majestic animals.
Now, officials estimate that there are roughly 6000 manatees in the sunshine
state and last year, a record, wow, that's really sad, a record 1101 died,
which is an incredibly grim statistic that nearly doubles the death rate from 2020.
>> Yeah, this is what we're talking about, they're very endangered.
So, just for Christ's sake, man, we've done enough damage, leave them alone.
>> Leave them alone.