Hey everyone, it's Justin again! Can you believe the journey we've been on? We've
gone from power outages at home to the news station, to the library, to Florida,
and all the way to Venezuela and back. And now, I have finally completed a draft of my
essay. I learned so much about lightning and myself. I bet your essay draft is amazing too!
Today, we're back home and -- oh, it seems like a storm is starting to roll in.
[Mia beeps excitedly] Huh, you're right, Mia, I didn't sound nervous. I didn't feel nervous
either. How about that? Before this storm gets here, let's see how we can improve our
essays through some revising and editing before we're ready for the final step -- publication!
Before we get started, make sure that you have your PDF ready to take notes. By the
end of this lesson, you'll be able to revise and edit writing in context and describe the
importance of revising and editing as part of the writing process. Let's get into it!
So, I know what you're thinking: Why do I need to revise and edit? What's the point
if I already have a rough draft of my essay? Well, a rough draft is your first version of
your essay. You revise and edit to get to your final draft. Revising and editing tend
to happen at the same time during the writing process. It helps our writing
flow better and keeps it accurate. This helps us make the best possible essay.
It's important to look closely at your own writing with the goal
of improving it. You can always expand on your great ideas, add more details,
and catch small errors. You become a better writer because you're able to
notice areas that you can improve. Writing can almost always be improved in some way.
All right, let's talk about revision and how it can transform our expository essays.
Revision is making major changes to the content or ideas in your essay. Revising
your essay could look like moving words around, adding new details,
or deleting information that you don't need. In order to revise your writing, you need to
ask yourself the following questions: Does the order of ideas I wrote make sense? Did I clearly
state my main idea? Did I give enough examples or details? Do my words flow well together?
Let's take a look at this passage from an expository essay. "They can bring strong winds
and heavy rain and cause flooding or storm surges. Hurricanes are rated by categories 1 through 5,
with 5 being the most severe. Hurricanes are powerful storms that form over warm ocean waters."
What do you think? From that first sentence alone, I'm not sure what they're writing about.
Something is definitely out of order here. Mia, do you think you could help us out here?
[Mia beeps instructively] Oh, OK. I'm thinking that we might need to
move some sentences around for this to make the most sense. What if I take that
final sentence and move it to the beginning of the passage instead?
Ah, yeah, that is a lot clearer! Thanks, Mia. This way, the reader knows exactly what the passage
is about from the very first sentence. Why don't you give this a try? Here's a passage to revise:
"Avoid flooded areas as they could have hidden dangers like sharp objects or downed power
lines. Make sure that you don't drink tap water until officials have said that it's
safe. Once the hurricane has passed, there are still safety measures to remember."
Does the order of these sentences make sense to show the idea of the paragraph? Try moving
around a sentence or two to see if that improves the passage. Pause the video here to revise.
How'd it go? Did you move some sentences around? Maybe you chose to move the third
sentence to the start of the paragraph. This revision would make the passage easier to
understand since it's giving a main idea before discussing the specific safety tips. Nice work!
Next, let's tackle editing. We want to make sure our essays are accurate,
straightforward, and free from errors. This is where editing comes in. Editing is the process
of checking for correct spelling, punctuation, and grammar in your essay. To edit your essay,
you could consult a dictionary or ask an adult if you're unsure about spelling. If
you drafted on a device, you could use a digital grammar-checking tool. You also have some great
editing resources in this lesson's PDF, too. Make sure to use the checklists and reference guide.
Why don't we take a look at another paragraph? "Whether scientists,
called meteorologists, use tools to predict when and where hurricans will strike. They
use satellites to track the storm's path and changes in weather patterns"
Oh, OK, there's definitely something wrong here! Look closely. This passage starts off with an
incorrect homophone that needs to be changed to "w-e-a-t-h-e-r." The word "hurricanes" is
misspelled too. There should be an "e" after the "n" to make it "hurricanes." Finally,
there needs to be a period at the end of the passage to close it out.
Why don't you give it a try? There are a few more errors in this passage:
"computers run models to forecast the storm's strength and potential landfall,
they also send specially equipped aircraft into hurricans to gather data in real time"
I've noticed five errors. Can you correct them? Pause the video now
to edit the passage in your PDF and meet me back here when you're done.
Did you find all five? You needed to capitalize the "C" in "computers" and add a period between
"landfall" and "they." You needed to capitalize "They" and add that "e" back into "hurricanes."
And, again, the last fix is to add a period at the end after the word "time." Great job, editors!
Through editing, we've polished these sentences, fixed spelling mistakes,
and ensured that the writing flows smoothly. As you revise and edit your essay over the
next few days, keep these tips in mind. Read your essay out loud in a way that works best
for you. You can use a text-to-speech tool that will read your essay out loud for you,
or have a trusted adult or friend read your essay for you. This will help you
catch small mistakes, and it can help you pay attention to how your words sound.
Sometimes, a second opinion from an adult or friend can help improve your essay as
well. Mia helped me revise and edit my essay, and it was incredibly helpful.
Sometimes taking a brain break from your writing is exactly what you need to get
some fresh ideas. Take a short break by doing a different activity and then come
back to your essay with a fresh mind. My favorite way to take a break is to get
outside for 15 minutes or so. That leaves me feeling refreshed and ready to jump back in.
So there you have it! From power outages to far-off Venezuela, we've weathered these
storms together and built essays that truly strike like lightning. Remember, the power of
a good essay isn't just in the writing, but it's also in the revising and editing, and you've got
that power! Once your essay has been revised and edited, it'll be ready for publication.
Our adventure may be coming to a close, but your writing journey is just beginning. With these tips
on revising and editing, you're more than prepared to handle any writing storm that rolls your way.
Speaking of, I think that storm is nearly here. I'm feeling excited -- Mia, you were right,
writing my essay about lightning did help me with my fear! I think Mia and I will
go watch the storm to see if we can spot any intra-cloud lightning. Maybe we'll even see some
cloud-to-ground. Ooh, how electrifying! Happy writing, my lightning linguists!