- I'm with Nick and Holly for the group assignment.
Well, fuck me, the two most useless people in this class.
Nick, well I've never seen him not stoned,
and Holly, well she can barely work out
how to open the door.
But that's okay, 'cause I'll probably have to do
all the work in this group assignment.
(upbeat music)
Oh my god, no, placement's going really well,
I'm really enjoying it.
So far I've learned how to properly observe
the things I'm currently studying,
which will sound useless,
but, you know, observation is the key to growth.
Also, it turns out, the office's favorite coffee is a latte.
Just six more weeks of not really doing anything, really,
I'm not actually doing anything in placement.
They just, they don't know what to do with me, so.
Anyway.
No, it's great.
I'm learning heaps.
He's written here, "Your referencing isn't correct."
Well, fuck you, you piece of shit.
Three lecturers have told me different things
about my referencing.
One says it's fine.
The other one says, "Oh no, don't put that one in italics.
Oh, that's not how you reference."
Ah, you know what I'm gonna do to you?
I'm gonna reference you in the face.
Professor Stevens taught me how to reference,
but Professor Johnson says that referencing is incorrect,
but then Professor Stevens says
his referencing is incorrect.
How the fuck do you want me to reference
my stupid references?
Okay,
let's start
on that 12,000 word essay.
Just before I do that, I need to check the Kmart catalog.
Oh my god, I want a green one.
A green, four green ones.
Just quickly check IKEA to see if they can
do a matching ottoman.
Ah, fuck, it's 1:00 AM!
Shit!
Haven't done anything.
Oh, it doesn't matter, I'll do it tomorrow.
Let's see what Jenna Miles is up to.
Follow the rubric and I'll do excellent, will I?
Well, you've handed it to me in German.
Is this German?
Oh no, it's English.
It just looks like German.
In fact, it actually looks like someone's just
mashed the keypad.
I think I'm more confused after reading it.
What the hell am I supposed to be doing?
Okay, Trish, you've entered university as a
mature-aged student, so you've got life experience
all over these youngsters.
They don't know, do they?
Also have three children and a very large mortgage.
Plus, I've gotta do the grocery shopping.
I was supposed to do that yesterday.
And I have to treat Mia's nits,
then I gotta take her to dancing.
Oh god, then I've gotta cook the dinner,
and do the school lunches,
and I have to finish the 14,000 word essay,
and do uni full-time.
You can do it (laughs mirthlessly).
Is anyone else getting really hot in here?
I feel like I'm drowning.
Oh my god, does anyone else feel like they're drowning?
No, they're all young with no responsibilities.
Oh, would you look at that!
I have to fork out another $450 for these supplies
that apparently I have to use for this assignment.
I don't know where that $35,000 a year
in course fees is going, but, you know,
it's not like I have a very minimal part-time job,
and I study full-time, and I also pay rent.
Oh, wait I do.
This might explain my alcoholism.
I've just checked my diary.
Oh no, this week should be fine!
I've got a really quiet week.
I've only got the typography assignment due,
the game board design, I've got a three-day placement,
I have two assessments on the Friday
that I've gotta study for.
I've also got my presentation on the revolution
of World War II, and I'm working three days at the cafe.
So, it's just a quiet week for me.
Hi mom, it's me. Yeah, good. Yeah, how are you?
Yeah, great. Yeah, declined again.
I've got no money. No, I never have money.
No, that's right. I'm a student.
I'm just permanently broke.
It's all going to food and rent,
and alcohol because it numbs the pain
of being completely poor and studying a shit load.
If you don't mind, yeah, just pop a couple hundred
in there, that'd be great.
Yes, I did hear about Malcolm Turnbull's increase
to student fees.
Thanks, Malcolm Turnbull, because we weren't already
paying enough.
Not like I'm really, really dirt poor.
Ah, I get student discounts on the train,
and at the movies.
What student can afford to go to the movies?
I download everything illegally.
But that's okay, because in four years time
I'll go out into the workforce, and there won't
be a job for me, because there's job shortages.
And then I'll just go back to working at KFC.
Maybe I should just quit uni and go there.
I mean, I spend most of my time and my money there anyway.
(upbeat music)