Four signs that it's time for you to leave them. "Them" could be the church, "them" could be a
particular community or relationship that you are a part of. So four things that I wanted
to share with you, concerning maybe you're debating on should I leave this relationship,
should I leave these people? Now I'm not necessarily referring to the dating
relationship. We have other videos about red flags or signs that you should pay attention to. This is
mainly relating to relationships that are outside of romantic relationships or dating relationships,
but mainly that have to do with church or they have to do with the Christian community. The
first one is if they have a different doctrine, and I'm not talking about like doctrine concerning
things that we can kind of disagree on. You know is the Antichrist, where the Antichrist is going
to be born and will Christians go through the tribulations or not? But I'm talking about some
pretty heavy difference in doctrine. Now in the Bible we see Paul actually arguing with Barnabas
against these particular people that we're trying to cause Gentile believers to still keep Moses's
law. In Acts 15:2, we see that there was a, "no small dissension," meaning disputing with them,
"they determined that Paul and Barnabas and certain others of them should go to Jerusalem,
to the apostles and elders, about this question." Paul got in a fight actually. He didn't leave this
group of people first but he got in a fight with them concerning doctrine. He then goes
to Jerusalem, presents it to Peter and some other people. Then they actually get together. Board of
elders and apostles get together in Acts 15:7. They make a decision and then Paul pretty much
carries out the decision that this board or this group of people that have made in Apostolic, in
the early church, and we're thankfully very glad that they made that decision. Otherwise we're all
going to have to, guys have to be circumcised and you know keep all the Old Testament laws. And so
they pretty much kind of like brought that freedom to the Gentile believers that we have to you know
abstain from sexual immorality and all of this stuff, but not necessarily go into the Mosaic law
which was fulfilled. When it comes to doctrine, it's very important that if you don't agree with
the core basic doctrine of a church or a group of people, that you leave and you go to a place where
you do agree with that. Now some people you know would leave a church that preaches and believes
that miracles don't happen today, that gifts of the Holy Spirit are not for today, deliverance is
not for today. We shouldn't be doing any of this kind of a ministry of supernatural in the church,
and so it could be a good reason even for you to leave. Now some people would stay and say, "Hey,
as long as Jesus is preached, the Bible is the Word of God and the rest of this stuff is not
essentials." But moving of the Holy Spirit is essential to a Christian's faith, and so
I personally wouldn't stay in the church if they say that you don't do deliverance, gifts of the
Holy Spirit are not for today. I would leave that kind of church and I think that you should too. Be
in the church where not only the fundamentals but also second hand issues, like speaking in tongues,
casting out demons, healing of the sick are also practiced and preached and believed,
because those things are very important to your spiritual growth, and so doctrine is huge. And
for those people who are maybe considering and you're noticing that that church is great but it's
something that you don't agree doctrinally in this area, this could be a sign that you need to go.
The second thing is when you're gonna leave them is when you actually have a personal disagreement
that has nothing to do with doctrine. It has to do mainly with the application of biblical principle.
Now we're going to come back to Paul, because Paul you know in chapter 15, in the beginning of the
chapter he has a fight about doctrine. He goes to Jerusalem, they get all their stuff sorted out,
but later on Paul, he has a beef with Barnabas. In fact let's read it. In Acts 15:39-40, it says:
So the background story is that Paul and Barnabas were like these two guys that were traveling and
planting churches, and Paul wanted to go back to visit those churches and Barnabas wants to
bring Mark. And Paul is like, no Mark you know he didn't follow us all the way. He quit halfway and
we're not going to bring Mark. He doesn't need to be on this team. Well Barnabas felt very strongly
they should bring Mark, until Paul and Barnabas actually fought. They had a huge disagreement,
huge fallout, and the Bible says it was sharp. Man, Apostle Paul, how could that be? Yeah,
he was human, and they had a sharp disagreement. This disagreement resulted in them parting ways.
Second reason why sometimes you'll part ways with churches, communities, because you have
a sharp disagreement about the application of biblical principle. Example, you have completely
different approach to how ministry should be done. Has nothing to do with speaking in tongues,
casting on demons. Has to do with "how" we speak in tongues, "how" we cast out demons. Now most
people can give up their "how" and say, "You know what, we're all learning." But some people
have very strong opinions and because they have very strong opinions, not because of pride, just
strong opinions. Not because they're offended, not because they have a lot of ambition, just a very
strong opinions of how things are supposed to be done. They have sharp disagreements and they will
part ways with the church or with the community. Now I wish I would say, "Please don't do it." But
I know that it's not going to be possible. People will leave churches. People will leave communities
of faith. People will leave certain fellowships because they do not agree with a particular
methodology. They don't have a problem with the message, they have a problem with the method. Now
we can condemn those believers and say, oh you should grow up and everything. But here we have
an example of Paul and Barnabas. This is how I look at it. If your motives are pure in the
sense that it's not pride, offended feelings and personal ambition. God can use even disagreements,
like the ones Paul had with Barnabas, to cause division that will become multiplication. Paul
and Barnabas, instead of having one team, became two teams. Two mission teams. It's still sad that
they parted ways, but later on we see actually Paul inviting Mark into his ministry and seeing
a need for Mark. So whether they fully reconcile with Barnabas, we don't know, but one thing we
do know and we trust that the Holy Spirit was working in the heart of Paul and Barnabas not
the harbor unforgiveness or any kind of resentful feelings. If you are in that place and you are
leaving a church or a ministry because they don't do deliverance the way you think they should do
it. I just pray that you keep your heart full of love. That you don't gossip about that ministry,
and you don't try to destroy that ministry because you disagree with their methods. But it's totally
okay, I don't have to give you the okay. I think you're gonna do it anyway, to leave sometimes
because you have very strong disagreements on methodology. That's why we have many churches
who do things differently and they seem to serve many different people. Not every church is the
same. Now the third reason that you need to move on, you need to leave is I call it the brook dried
up. 1 Kings 17:7-9 it says, "And it happened after a while that the brook dried up, and there was no
rain in the land. And the word of the LORD came to him, saying, Arise," and so forth He tells Elijah.
Now God leads him to this brook, God feeds him at this brook and now the brook dries up. And
instead of waiting for God to revive the brook, actually God speaks to him and says, "Move on."
And sometimes I think there is a season that you were in in the church or in the community,
and there was a time there was water there. There was a time there was a spiritual replenishing and
growth that was taking place there. You were serving, and I'm not saying, I'm not talking
to people who stopped serving, who stopped participating in the church. I'm talking about
people who served, who are right in the center of God's will but for some reason it's dry now. The
brook dried up. The place that you used to have revival is the place where you only have routine,
and you're not leaving because the brook is dry. You are leaving because the word of the Lord comes
and says, "Arise and move on." So this is not just saying, "Oh, I feel dry. I don't get fed so I'm
leaving the church now. I'm gonna leave this group and this community." It's not that but the dry
brook becomes this almost like a foundation for you to hear now the Lord is saying, "Move forward,
move on." Give this place up and go to the next place that he has for you. The fourth reason to
move on is your destiny. What do I mean by that? Genesis 31:1-3 it says, "Now Jacob heard the words
of Laban's sons, saying, 'Jacob has taken away all that was our fathers, and from what our fathers he
has acquired all of his wealth.' Jacob saw the face of Laban, and indeed it was not favorable
toward him as before. Then the LORD said to Jacob, "Return to the land of your fathers and to your
family, and I will be with you.'" The background story. Jacob is running from his brother. He goes
to Laban. He works for him seven years, gets an older daughter, works for him seven years,
gets a younger daughter. And then works the rest of the year to get reward and livestock
and all of that stuff. God starts blessing him, finally he catches a break. A breakthrough came
to Jacob and he's noticing that people are saying some bad stuff about him in this place. he's been
there for about 20 years and he's hearing kind of bad rumors. Then he's noticing that Laban
doesn't have any like favor toward him. He is not happy about Jacob, and then the Lord says,
"Go back home." And so the destiny of Jacob was not supposed to be in Laban's house, even though
he spent there 20 years, his wives are from there, his livestock. I mean everything he has came from
Laban but where God has him in his future is not in Laban's house, and how do you know that this
Laban's house is not your destiny? Sometimes you hear conversations behind your back. Sometimes you
see the faces of people, they're not as favorable. but this is the big one. You're listening to the
Holy Spirit and He's telling you, "This is not your destiny here. You have to move on and you
have to move." And so and when you sense that it's a scary feeling make sure that you exit properly,
not like Jacob. Jacob just pretty much loaded his wealth, loaded his possessions, told his wives and
just left. Didn't tell Laban. He was afraid to address to him that he's going to leave,
and so he just took off, and I think that's a wrong way of exiting. And so I want to encourage
you that if you are in the place right now where you're exiting a ministry or a church, that you do
it honorably because the way you enter the next season will be dependent on how you exit this
one. Be honest. Communicate to the elders, to the leaders, the people that you are accountable to.
Don't sugarcoat it, don't lie, don't just simply say that "Hey, God told me to move," but just be
honest. Say, "Hey, I don't see you know myself anymore here and I prayed about it. I've taken
some time to reflect and ponder, and I just don't sense that that's where the Lord has me," and
honor them. You know if you notice something that is there that is wrong and you disagree with, you
be honest. You say why you're leaving, you tell them that you disagree with this or you disagree
with that. But be kind and be loving, but also be very honest. Don't lie, don't say, "Oh yeah, this
is a great place." And then you move to a next season, to another church or another ministry,
and then you start gossiping about this church. That's not right. God is not going to bless that
kind of mess. So be very honest with the ministry that you're leaving, ask for their blessing. Now
if that ministry is more of a cult, meaning like they will threaten you, or they will try to curse
you for leaving, or they're trying to scare you. Then you just go. Your job was done, you asked
them for permission. It is their job to let you go and to release you because you don't belong to
them, you belong to the Lord. And when you receive that blessing if they give it to you, then you
move into the next Church, the next place, the next ministry and be gracious. Don't talk about
the other ministry, don't drag the other ministry into this one ,don't try to compare the pastors,
don't try to constantly talk about, "Oh, when I was in the other church, it was so toxic,
it was so bad." Like unless you're doing it to your counselor, or a therapist, or a particular
mentor who's fully aware of you, don't drag that ministry through the mud. You wouldn't want people
to do that to you, don't do that to them. I always tell people that don't bring your ex into your
next. Leave your ex behind. Jesus says, if they rejected you in one city, shake off the dust,
go to the next city. Don't bring the dust and the dirt from the previous season, the previous
ministry into the next one, because if you do that you will contaminate the next season in your life.
Imagine it like this. Let's say that you have a house and you went to work on your yard. You went
with your boots; it's raining. Now your boots are very dirty, full of dirt. Will you walk into your
living room, into your master bedroom and into your bed with dirty boots? No, you will leave
them somewhere in the garage, you will leave them somewhere outside. You're not gonna contaminate
your house because you're coming from the outside in. So same thing. Don't contaminate the next
season because you're exiting maybe a bad season, or a season that God is just taking you from and
bringing it to the next season. Don't bring the stuff from your past into your present. This
applies to your marriage, if you've been divorced, or this applies to maybe if you had a breakup, or
this applies to exiting one ministry and go into another. Don't gossip, don't spread the rumors. Be
a person that learns the lesson and steps into a new season. Because for a pastor like me for
example, if somebody comes to our church and they begin to talk bad about the pastor they came from.
To me that's a red flag right away not to trust this person. This person is going to do to me
what they're doing to them. It's just a matter of time, and so like I right away like put my walls
up. And I'm like if I don't stop them right away, and say, "Hey, we don't do that here." Then I just
walk away because I don't tolerate that, no matter how bad the church was where they came from.
I just don't play by those rules. I don't do that and I do not want people to do that in
my presence. If they have a problem they need to go to that pastor. I am not put over that pastor
to fix his problems, and so I don't need to know everything you've been, and I don't need to know
everything that you've done and what they've done to you. Unless you're seeing me for counseling and
you need inner healing, but that's a different story. So these are just few thoughts that I
wanted to share with you about four signs or four reasons that you would kind of pay attention to,
if you are on that verge of leaving a ministry, leaving a church and transitioning into to a
new season. I hope this brought some clarity and also some understanding. I tried to use scriptural
references as well for that when people were exiting one season into another. Let me know
in the comments below, have you went through that? What was your experience like? Why did you leave
a particular ministry, move to another one? Have you done it the right way or have you done it a
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