welcome to the ancestral findings podcast what do you do if you can't find a marriage record
bond or bans no matter where you look fortunately there are alternative ways to find a marriage
date or record that a marriage took place here are some places to look
sometimes you just can't find a marriage record bond or bans no matter how hard you try because it
doesn't exist either it never existed in the first place or it has been lost to time long ago despite
the religious and legal requirements not everyone did these things there were private ceremonies
usually conducted with offshoot branches of a larger church and these ceremonies didn't require
any official documentation and were done outside of involving civil authorities to record it
also common law marriages were much more common than you might realize this is when people never
officially married but lived together as husband and wife for so long and presented themselves
to their community as such that they became considered legally married in the eyes of the law
even without a ceremony or documentation a famous common law marriage was that of no less than
benjamin franklin and his wife deborah deborah had been previously married to a man who abandoned her
as no one knew if he was alive or not and was never seen in his community again
deborah was not legally free to remarry she and benjamin lived together as husband and wife had
children together and were considered married by all of their neighbors friends and family they
were together for decades and are buried next to each other all without a record of their marriage
because there wasn't one so what do you do if you need or want a marriage date for your genealogical
records but can't find official documentation that the marriage occurred or likely occurred
here are some ideas check the census records the 1900 u.s federal census asks how long a couple
has been married it won't give you an exact date but it will give you an idea of what year they
got married this may be the closest you're able to come to a marriage date look at town vital records
these are great resources for colonial and early american new england relatives even if there is
no certificate bond or bans that you can find the marriage is likely recorded in the town records
if you know what town the couple lived in check there you will probably just find names and maybe
the bride's father's name and a marriage date but it is still excellent documentation check old
newspaper records if the marriage record seems to have been lost to time the announcement of it may
still exist in an old local newspaper it may be just a simple one or two line announcement
or it may be a detailed description of the wedding with the names of the parents of both bride and
groom included newer records from the 1930s onward may even include a photo of the bride try local
church records if a couple belong to a local church especially a rural one they may not have
been able to easily record their marriage with the town or county their local church though may have
a record of their wedding taking place there it's worth checking to possibly find this gym
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