hey insider let me ask you a question have you ever wondered when you for
example you're in a room and somebody walks in and they like ooze power
charisma and likability have you ever wondered Wow how's that happening well
the reality is is they've mastered what it's called body language and they've
often I found they most often not most people aren't naturals when it comes to
this they've studied their processes and this is how successful people today they
get advantage over the majority of people who don't know or understand this
stuff because ideally when you want to be more successful it's about
understanding that your net worth is in your network so being able to expand
your network being able to influence people is what's gonna make you more
successful and that's why in today's video I'm gonna break down the five
body language secrets that successful people utilize in order to create
influence and connection like no other and so without further ado make sure to
pay close attention and let's go onto the first point which is about utilizing
what's called a facial triangle now if I'll just gaze at you in the eyes
okay just constantly just in the eyes and not break eye contact it's gonna
seem really really weird right some people do it because when I was shy when
I was an introvert I I heard about importance to make an
eye contact and I made it I was so scared especially when it came to girls
making eye contact and so I just took this to an extreme level and I just
stared at the girls eyes are like this and I remember wondering why girls seemed
always freaked out by myself and I found it's because I just gazing at their eyes
without blinking right now what facial triangle is about is about having a look
realizing that you should glance at both eyes then down to the mouth and if you
do this just naturally by the way it shouldn't be like synchronized like
because it's gonna be so weird okay it's gonna be natural just watch somebody
who's natural naturally good at communicating watch how they communicate
you can watch the videos for example interviews of successful people watch
how they communicate they're constantly not just gazing here at the eyes they're
also looking down as well it's very natural and what you're doing when
you're looking at the mouth you also signifying subconsciously that you're
listening to them and so utilize the first secret is to utilize what it's
called a facial triangle go check it out online there's a lot of you know studies
as well as some further information regards to this it's definitely worth
adopting for those of you who are not aware of the strategy now let's go into
the second secret second secret is slouching okay now if you look at
successful people when they are for example in communication or when they
walk into the room you can tell instantly they're oozing power you can
often tell who are celebrities in the room from those who aren't because the way
they're composing their themselves I found when I used to game a lot when I
was a child I used to be addicted to these like online multiplayer games and
so forth and as a result I was just constantly slouching in just on my
computer because I wasn't watching my posture and yet often heard from my mom
stand up straight sit up straight but I didn't like it I was
resisting even any orders from school teachers to my mum but now I understand
why people are saying that how the society way says sit up straight not
only it is good for composure but it's also how we're perceived I remember when
I was younger trying to get a job and I would walk in slouching you know I was
hanging out with very negative people who were like I supposed dead broke like
myself and as a result we just used to look lazy plus we we people think we're
lazy because I didn't a people make milli second judgment in regards to how
how we how we are based upon the the body language right and so if you're if
you're as a sloucher you wanna make a conscious habit of constantly standing
up straight sitting up straight it makes a huge huge difference it all should
also shows respects that other person because if you look at your hating the
the conversation even if you're loving it but your body if your body language
is showing it like this for example imagine that I've been doing this video
I'm like this hey insiders I hope you're well
hey I wanna show you like you can tell how I'm just not engaging but if I sit up
straight and I'm like hey insiders so I'm gonna show you the power of not
slouching and what you should do instead you can tell a big big difference so
make a conscious habit of never slouching again to sit up straight
especially when you're communicating with the other person that is a second
secret now let's go on to the third secret the first secret is is to not
cross your arms and this is a very common knowledge and I still see so many
people naturally they create a habit of just constantly crossing their arms like
this and I know what you think it's sometimes you're cold or or what but it
sends off for very much a negative energy to the other person because
compared difference I could talk to you right now like this or like this one of
the things I have noticed that I was doing when I was early beginning to be
on stages and learning how to be a public speaker I realized I always
put my hands in my pocket always just cross my arms because I was nervous
right I still am an introvert to this day but I've mastered the art of
being an extrovert through public speaking training and so forth now I
always used to do this I used to do but just compare it right now you can see
the huge difference so you wanna make sure that consciously you're making
a habit of of being in an open body language that way that other person
perceives that you are open opposed to being closed to their information if
somebody's talking to you and you're doing this you're sending off wrong
signals and that's not what you wanna get across because what what if that
person's like an investor right and you're just like yeah I want the
investment this business I'm creating is the best they're just not gonna buy it
okay so make sure to stop crossing your arms
now let's go to the fourth point the fourth point is inconsistency with what
you're saying and how you're perceived through body language for example some
people say to me nowadays I see I see it nowadays when I'm running these events
all across the globe and I say to somebody who wants to try public
speaking for the first time they raise their hands they go onto the stage and
they grab the mic they're normally shaking like this normally the whole body
sometimes shaking right I've definitely been there and they're like and I say okay
I want you to introduce yourself and tell a really cool fact about
yourself and they say something in the lines of hey my name is John and I'm
really happy to be here and everyone's just like looking around just thinking
wow this person seems so happy right now this is over-exaggeration of course I
found when people are communicating because they've not practiced and by the
way I want you to realize I'm not a natural this what I was saying at UCL couple
days ago which is one of the top prestigious universities I was being
invited to guest lecturer as saying I'm not a natural I've just practiced loads
of times for example on camera in the mirror and I practiced how am I using my
hands right am I open body language how am i for example talking am i smiling
when I'm saying something that's happy or am I frowning when I'm saying
something I don't like sometimes have you ever met somebody for example let me
ask you have you ever met somebody where they say oh you know I really understand
what you mean let's say you went through something that's terrible and you want
them to feel how you feel but then there's smiling constantly right that is
also inconsistency as well because if you just constantly smile it's also
deemed as fake all right I'm sure some of you probably are yeah I've met those
people who can't see smile and they're never stop smiling
so you don't wanna be one of those people as well there has to be
consistency behind what you're saying and your body language as well that is
the fourth point the fifth point is exaggerated nodding right I'm sure
you've met those people who can't see like this right and in some cultures by
the way this is a norm in fact this is a habit I had to break by way to notice
whilst i'm doing this and speaking how it's really really irritating especially
if you're talking to me right imagine I'm just doing this right I'm
sure you've met people who just constantly just nod and they're like yeah yeah
yeah in Seoul South Korea when I was growing up we we often when we're in
conversation we're constantly doing this because it's sign of respect however if
we're constantly doing this this is going to be very irritating and in fact
the condition I went through in Seoul South Korea was we also have to say like
for example yes or nay it was in Korea it was just a constantly
thing there like that and I came to England thinking
that was a polite way of communicating with others and everyone just fought I
was really really strange I remember the conversation would run so thin I'm sure
you've had experience where you wanna speak with somebody for a long duration
of time but then the conversation gets shut down straight away it's because
what you're what you're putting out there in regards to subconscious signals
through body language like this because when you're just constantly yes
what you're saying to the other person is you want that conversation to stop
because you're saying that's how they're perceiving because if you're saying oh
yeah I went to or went on holiday and you constantly see like this what you're
sending out is you want you want to be able to talk right and this is why yes
to this day I do not when I'm listening however I also know when to stop and
just be still so you wanna make sure that you become conscious of these
habits because communication is such a vital skill if you wanna be successful
you've got to be able to expand your network you got to be able to reach out
to Mentors and you've got to be able to sell to your clients if you're in
business right now and that comes from mastering communication so I hope you
found this video helpful by the way if you have be sure to click the like
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take care