Success is the accomplishment of an aim or a purpose.
It sounds simple enough as is
if what we want is a college degree,
and we actually go get a college degree
we could consider that success.
Or if we write a letter,
because we feel like our aim or purpose in writing that letter
is that the other person will feel loved
and by reading the letter the other person actually does feel loved,
we can say that we succeeded.
However,
we need to simplify the concept of success even further
by looking at a more Universal objective perspective.
The reason is that we may accomplish an aim or a purpose
that we don't actually want
and that is not in alignment
with a more objective Universal definition of success.
Please pause and read before you watch this video:
What is Success?
I'm gonna give you an example;
A person may not actually want a specific job,
but they may apply for it
and because they set it as an aim to get that job,
when they actually get the job,
by a standard definition, that would be success.
However, the attainment of that job
did not add to a person's well-being
or sense of personal success in any way.
So, here it is:
from a more Universal objective perspective
the definition of success is to achieve what one wants.
And guess what?
This is why nobody can actually agree upon
what is and what isn't success.
Because,#1: People disagree
about what aim or purpose is good and right.
And #2: Not everyone wants the same thing
because people have different values, needs and desires.
I'm gonna give you an example:
Many people in the Western World
feel that having a mansion and a penthouse
and multiple businesses and five luxury cars
and a closet full of designer clothes
and constantly traveling on your private jet
means that a person is experiencing success.
However if you are Amish, you wouldn't think so.
You would believe that living a modest and simple life
is good and right.
Therefore your picture of success
might look like a simple home with no electricity,
home-cooked meals, a horse and buggy,
spending quality time with family, friends and community
and enjoying the natural world.
Or, for example,
one person might really want and value quality leisure time.
They would see success as someone being able to have
lots of enjoyable zero pressure down time.
And another might really want and value achievements.
They would see success as someone who is proactive and busy
so as to produce and rack up awards and reach goals.
I should say that a person's picture for success
tends to change over the course of their life.
Not only because our perspective changes over the course of our life,
but also because so do our values
and so do our needs.
I don't know if you remember from an earlier video,
but, needs are what creates our sense of values.
So if values change and desires change,
so does our vision of success.
Nevertheless,
we as people love to do something;
We love to project.
And when we project around success,
what we do is that we love to think
that other people definitely should
or do have our same sense of what is good and right.
Therefore, what's good and right to achieve.
Not only this, we also tend to project
this idea that somebody else
should or does have the same desires,
needs and therefore values that we do
and therefore definition of success.
We think our own picture of success is absolutely superior,
so everybody else should definitely agree with it,
and if they don't,
we're somehow superior to them
and then we definitely need to convert them
to our picture of success.
For humanity to progress,
we need to be able to recognize all forms of success,
rather than minimizing or negating some,
while exulting and revering others.
Regardless of whether or not
we specifically want that aim or purpose
and therefore, type of success.
Imagine a world where you have two people.
One is a Thespian who is usually short on cash
and who moves to whatever city has a part in a show to offer.
One as a lawyer with tons of money to burn
and who will not take any real risks in life.
It is obvious that these two people have different desires and values.
Their picture of success,
that is the success they want, is different.
But imagine that the lawyer
can genuinely recognize the Thespian's ability to tell stories
and confidence in front of a crowd,
and dedication to ruthlessly following through on their passions,
as success.
And the Thespian can genuinely recognize
the financial security that the lawyer has built up
and the business they have created
and the legal knowledge they have attained,
as success.
When we say:
"I can't recognize that person as a success",
what we really mean is:
"I can't say that that person has achieved
anything that I need, desire or value".
All this being said,
it's especially hard to recognize something as success
when we watch that somebody attained whatever goal or purpose
that they had in mind
at the expense of somebody else.
Meaning, them achieving that goal
was done in a way that brought harm to somebody or something
or was against the best interest of somebody or something.
But here's the thing,
it actually is success at that goal or aim.
What they didn't succeed however,
is something like harmony,
or at creating safe relationships,
or at creating system health,
or at enhancing the well-being of the other.
Here's the problem though:
that's not gonna matter much
unless that person wants those things.
Unless that person wants harmony in the system
health and the best interests of the other, for example.
So, what most of us are left with is this desperate desire
for the other person to desire that.
And by doing so,
to be able to accommodate the best interests of all
in their picture of success.
Now, that all this has been said
and you understand just how many different types of success there are
and just how individualized the picture of success is for all people,
it's important to know the following:
You are not going to succeed at accomplishing something
i.e. succeeding with someone,
unless your picture of success and theirs, is a match.
You have to agree on the picture of success.
If not, you're opening the door super super wide
for all kinds of conflict.
A person's picture of success
is a big element of compatibility.
And here's something interesting:
You may share all kinds of values with somebody else,
meaning you and the other person may have the same values.
The question is, in what order?
Because life has a nasty little habit
of pitting one of our values, against another one of our top values
and when this is a case we have to prioritize.
And in relationships when we have to prioritize like that,
it's an issue if you prioritize this way,
and the other person prioritizes this way.
If someone else that we are trying to accomplish something with
would prioritize those same values
that we have in a different order,
it's guaranteed that they will not agree with the decisions and actions we take
and vice versa.
Suddenly their values and our values
will be juxtaposed.
And believe me,
when it feels like, to begin with
you're super aligned with somebody's image of success
and then suddenly you aren't, it's a very confusing process.
So that you can understand all of this,
got an example for you;
Max and Richard own a business in healthcare for seniors together.
Both of them love financial success
and both of them really care about helping people who need care,
so starting a business in healthcare was the best of both worlds.
A few years back their company got sued,
as a result, they needed to make enough money
to afford a court case.
This situation caused both of their top values
to be tested against one another.
Max decided that because
his top value in life is financial security,
money was the bigger value
and therefore, should be the priority.
Meanwhile, Richard has always had family money.
He decided that helping people who need care regardless of money
should matter most.
Both simply assumed the other was on the same page
instead of directly communicating,
and suddenly, they were disagreeing on literally everything.
Max wanted to sever relationships
with insurance companies that were difficult to get payouts from
and discontinue some of the programs they had for seniors on low incomes
and consider murder deals
with much larger competitive companies.
Richard wanted to bleed their accounts dry for the court case
and even do fundraisers if necessary
so they could continue business as they had always done.
Especially their programs for seniors on low incomes.
Now you, sitting here at home with your definition of success
based off of your values
may look at this situation
and in your mind think:
"Well it's obvious who the better
and more moral person in the situation is,
it's Richard".
But here's the thing,
in this situation even all the accountants agreed
that Richard's course of action
could put them entirely out of business.
Not only does that create huge issues for them personally,
both Max and Richard,
it also means that inevitably
there's a situation where all of the seniors
that they're caring for at this moment
suddenly have no care,
and have to go search for other providers.
And some of them have families that can do that,
and others really don't.
The point of the story actually has nothing to do with morality.
Has nothing to do with what you think is right or wrong.
What it has to do with is highlighting this idea
of how important it is
for two people who are trying to accomplish something together
to share the same picture of success.
Not only that,
for them to have compatibility relative to their values.
And this is especially important
in a situation like we just explored
where somebody gets into a situation
where their values have to be prioritized.
When you are trying to establish compatibility
so as to achieve anything with someone else,
whether that is a good relationship or a business goal,
it is important to make sure
that you are on the same page with them about the picture of success
and also, should the need arise,
the prioritization of values.
Long story short,
success is to achieve what one wants.
And it is pointless to do what we usually do
which is to sit here and argue all day long
about whether somebody is successful or not,
or something is success or not,
based off of whether they have achieved something
that WE want or not.
But to make it all more grounded...
If someone wants a millionaire lifestyle
because a millionaire lifestyle is what represents their values,
a millionaire lifestyle is successful to them.
If someone wants to be awakened
because everything that comes with Awakening
is in alignment with their values,
being awakened is successful to them.
If someone wants a close family
because that is what will provide their needs,
therefore it's what they want,
and it's in alignment with their values,
having a close family is successful to them.
If I were to tell you my picture of success
and therefore my definition of success
it would be based off of what I want.
And even if I were to share with you today
a more objective universal perspective
of what the universe at large thinks success is,
it would be something that's in alignment
with what that overall amalgamation of subjective perspective
therefore, universal consciousness wants.
Your picture of success
is going to evolve over the course of your lifetime
because your perspective will change,
so will your needs, so will your desires
and so will your values.
It's okay to let them change.
Now that you know all of this,
the most important question that you can ask yourself
is the following:
Is the way that I am thinking,
are the decisions that I am making
and are the actions that I am taking
actually bringing me to what I actually want?
Have a good week.
If you liked this video,
be sure to hit the like button,
subscribe to my channel
and consider sharing this video with your friends.
You can also click on the bell icon
to be notified of the next time that I post a video.
I wanna thank you personally
for the bravery that you have to step into awareness.
I'll see you in the next video.
Subtitles by volunteer: Tanya Duarte If you would like to contribute to the subtitles Join the volunteer subtitle group on Facebook ASK TEAL TRADUCTION/TRANSLATION